INEVITABLE
by Falling4theFallen
Summary: Patch & Nora have always been best friends, but what will happen when teenage hormones leave them plagued with dreams & fantasy's & tragedy strikes? Will their friendship survive? Will they? Friendship 2 Lust 2 love or none of the above? No flames, I'm new-starts out slow AU/AH/OOC-Plz R&R *LEMONS! CHAP 3 ON-In Progress, I haven't quit! I'm writing 2 other stories at the same time
1. Chapter 1

_**CHAPTER ONE**_

_**TEN YEARS OLD**_

_**PATCH**_

**I was laying in bed thinking about my latest prank and wondering how long I'd be grounded for this time when I heard my window slide open. Nora.**

"**Patch?" I heard her whisper.**

"**I'm awake." I was used to her sneaking in my room in the middle of the night. The truth was I looked forward to them, I just hated the reason she did. "Do I need to get the first aid kit?"**

"**No. He just slapped me this time and yelled a lot." I felt her sit on the edge of my bed and scooted over automatically like I always did so she could lay down beside me. The first time she snuck into my room we were five and her dad had given her a black eye and a split lip because she had accidentally broken a glass when it slipped out of her hands and hit the floor. It scared me when I heard her tap on my locked window. It happened so often after that I just left my window unlocked for her.**

"**He said it was all my fault Patch." I heard her sniff once she was settled next to me.**

"**What was your fault this time?" I hated her dad, he was always blaming her for something and usually with his hands.**

"**He...he said..he said it was my fault my mom got sick!" She broke down in a sob, her whole body shaking against me.**

"**That wasn't your fault. Your dad's a jerk and he's lying. I heard my mom and dad talking and he cheated on your mom that's why she went crazy and had to be taken away." I raised my arm and pulled her into my side as she cried. I wouldn't do this for anyone else, I have a reputation already for getting in trouble and being a bad ass, I didn't need my soft and mushy side getting around school and ruining it because I didn't have one. Except with Nora. I spend more time grounded, about to be grounded and suspended at school then anything else. Even the older boys feared me. My midnight black hair on onyx eyes caught peoples attention but I had a grin that both attracted and scared the hell out of people. I looked every bit the trouble maker that I am. Nora is the only one who see's a different side of me, besides my parents who border between loving amusement and total horror at my pranks and behavior.**

"**He said it was my fault, if I hadn't been born they'd still be together. I don't even know her Patch!" She sobbed. At ten I didn't really have experience comforting anyone, I just hoped I was doing it right as I rocked her gently like my mom did to me when I was little and got hurt. It always seemed to calm her down so I continued to do it.**

"**Shh, it's not your fault. You've never even met your mom. She was hospitalized in that place before you were born." I hated that she felt guilty for something that wasn't her fault.**

"**I hope your right. I miss her and I don't even know her." Nora sniffled then yawned.**

"**Of course I'm right, I'm always right." I gave her a playful poke in the ribs. "We should get some sleep before you have to sneak back out." She was snoring softly before I even had the words all the way out. I knew she didn't get much sleep when she wasn't here with me. You could tell by the circles under her eyes. Nora was a pretty girl with brown hair that had red highlights when the light or sun hit it. Her eyes were a soft gray that changed in depth with her mood. When she was mad or defiant they would turn steel gray, when she was depressed or upset they looked stormy, but most of the time they were a soft, kind shade of gray that displayed her personality perfectly.**

…**...**

_**NORA**_

_**I woke up as soon as I heard the clock radio go off, it was playing some song with the words 'good day sunshine' in it that I didn't recognize but hoped were true. I quickly and quietly got out of bed and reset the alarm for 7:30 am when Patch would need to be up. It took him ten minutes to shower and five to get dressed since he wore the same thing every day: dark blue or black jeans, a dark color Henley, usually black or gray with an occasional maroon or dark blue, and black motorcycle boots. That left him 15 minutes to get to school and since the bell rang at 8:15 he would have 5 minutes to spare.**_

_**I glanced over at Patch and whispered thanks to him before climbing back out the window to get in my bed before my dad found out I wasn't there. I didn't need to give him anymore reason's to hit me then he found on his own. Patch and I have been best friends since I can remember. We live next door to each other and from the time we could walk we've been inseparable. Patch is eight months older than me. He was born in February and I was born in October. His personality can be as cold and frosty as the month he was born in, but to me he's sweet and protective. I'm not an outcast, but I'm not popular like my half sister Marcie who has our dad wrapped around her finger. She's the bubbly one that everybody likes, too bad she's an airhead. She only cares about herself and our money, or should I say 'their' money. Her and dad are two peas in a pod and we've never gotten along. I'm only here because my dad has no other choice. I've never met my mom since he won't take me to see her. People say I look just like her, I have to take their word for it since I really don't know. The only person I have in my life is Patch, well, his parents too. His dad is a prestigious lawyer and his mom is chief of surgery at the hospital here so they're gone most of the time. They love me like they do Patch, his mom is the closest thing I have to a mom. Since his parents are gone so much they have a nanny who takes care of Patch, her name is Dorothea. His mom and dad made sure to tell her that I'm welcome there anytime and to make extra after school snacks and dinner for me because I'm over there more than I'm home. I don't have to worry about being hit when I'm with Patch. No one messes with him, he's been in more fights than any other boy in our school and he's won them all.**_

"_**Nora! Get your but out of bed or I'm going to tell dad your making me late!" Marcie was standing in my doorway yelling at me. She lived to get me into trouble and embarrass me. Her and her mother were the bane of my existence. As if my dad didn't hate me enough they were perfect in his eyes and they did everything they could to rub that in. Our first day of first grade Marcie stole my chocolate milk. The second day she "accidentally" spilled the chocolate milk we fought over, she won, all over my favorite new school shirt. I didn't get clothes very often like she did, I got just enough to look nice so that people wouldn't notice the way I was treated compared to my sister who got anything and everything she wanted. I didn't care about material things, I just wanted him to see me like he saw Marcie. I worked hard in school, did my chores without arguing, I didn't get in trouble but no matter how hard I try my dad doesn't care or take any interest in me. I just keep hoping that if I continue to try some day he'll love me like he does my sister.**_

…_**...**_


	2. Chapter 2 - THIRTEEN YEARS OLD

_**CHAPTER 2**_

_**THIRTEEN YEARS OLD**_

_**PATCH**_

"**Patch! Wait up!" I heard my favorite voice in the world shout at me. I was just putting my books in my locker when she came running down the hall. I saw her glance at the stack of folded notes in my hand.**

"**How many today?" She asked.**

"**I don't know, I haven't counted them yet." I lied knowing she would call me out on it.**

"**Liar." Yep, I was right. Nora was normally quiet but under it all she had a strength that people over looked. If push came to shove she would be the person to have on your side and she was honest, thoughtful and the best friend a kid could have. She didn't make many friends though, she kept mainly to herself and her girl friend Vee who did most of the talking for her. Vee was loud and hard to miss and we had an uneasy acquaintance.**

"**Who are they from?" **

**I smirked. "Four." I gave her the number of the different girls the stack of notes all folded into fancy shapes was from instead of the names like she asked for.**

"**That's not what I asked, Patch." Her eyes flashed.**

"**I know." I loved seeing her get all fired up. What can I say? Girls had discovered me and I discovered that it paid to be a 'bad boy'. I wasn't interested in my best friend any more than she was interested in me which was not at all, least not in the more than friends way, but that didn't mean we were used to each other being noticed in that way. **

"**You know we always walk home together so what are you so excited about that your yelling at me down the hall?" I tried to distract her.**

"**Scott asked me out." Her words came out in a tumble. **

"**What did you say?" I asked her coolly. There was no love loss between Scott and me. It was no secret that I didn't like him.**

"**I said yes." She looked nervous. Nora had been trying to win her dad's approval up until this year when she finally realized that she was never going to get it, now it's just my approval she cares about and honestly, I didn't approve of Scott but Nora liked him for some unknown reason. **

"**Nora, you don't need my approval. Do what you want, I don't care who you go out with." So long as they don't hurt you or come between us I added to myself. I had no doubts that Scott would do at least one of those and it made my stomach lurch and my fist clench.**

"**I know you don't like him but.." I cut her off.**

"**It's not that I don't like him, I don't TRUST him, not with you." I shook my head. **

"**Then trust me. You'll see, I like him Patch." **

"**I do trust you, you know that." I sighed and slammed my locker door shut ready to be done with this conversation. "You ready to go?"**

"**Yeah. Hey did you hear we're getting a new student tomorrow?" Nora fell into step with me. She wasn't short but she wasn't tall either like Vee was so I had to slow my pace for her to keep up. Vee was tall for a girl, not as tall as me, definitely taller than Nora.**

"**Yeah, fresh meat." I smirked and elbowed her. Nora laughed. I needed somebody knew to pick on. There was no guys in our school worth hanging out with but since I was popular with the girls they thought I was worth it. At one point or other I had done something to every one of them so it didn't make any sense to me that they thought I was their buddy all of a sudden. The only friend I had was Nora and that was enough for me. **

"**You're still grounded from skipping class last week. You can't even call those desperate girls writing you love letters." She teased me.**

"**Dorothea loves me, plus, what she doesn't know won't hurt her." I winked.**

"**You mean it won't hurt you." She rolled her eyes.**

"**That too." I grinned. "Are you coming over?"**

"**I don't know. I have homework to do and I promised to call Scott before my dad get's home."**

**I tried to shake off the dark cloud that rolled through me at the mention of Scott's name. He was already invading my time with Nora. She must have sensed it because she quickly glanced at me and started talking again.**

"**You know that if I don't get my homework done my dad is going to freak out and school pictures are this week, I don't want my face or arms bruised. Besides, you're just going to be on the phone with all those pathetic girls drawing hearts around your name on their notebooks." She wrinkled up her nose.**

"**Careful Nora, I might think you're jealous that girls like me. You're the one who wants to call Scott the dumb jock." I teased her while pretending to gag. Deep inside I knew that it was me that was jealous even though I had no reason to be. I was just used to her wanting to spend all of her time with me.**

**Nora stopped walking and turned to face me with narrowed eyes. "Should I be jealous?" She looked like she was searching my face and my eyes for an answer she was never going to get from them. I was awesome at reading people but no one could read me, not even Nora. Even at twelve years old I wore a perfect mask that never gave away what I was thinking and I was good at saying things that weren't lies but evaded answering questions. Her question caught me by surprise though which was hard for her to do since she was so easy to read.**

"**What do you mean?" I asked. We were friends nothing more so why would she ask if she should be jealous?**

"**Are you going to replace me with one of those drooling girls? They're just like Marcie all backstabbing gossipers." She huffed and I could see the storm clouds pass through her eyes at the mention of her sister's name before the steel set in a show of indifference that I could see right through.**

"**I'm not going to replace you, Nora, you're my Angel. You'll always be my number one." I put my arm around her and turned us, guiding her down the street again. **

"**Do you promise? Promise you won't let those girls come between us." Her voice held a trace of the anxiety I could tell she had. Her dad had cheated on her mom when she was pregnant with her and he had knocked his mistress up too. He told Nora's mom about his affair and that the other lady was pregnant, which was ironic since the reason he'd had the affair was that he was pissed off Nora's mom was pregnant. He was head over heels in love with her mom but he hadn't wanted to share her with any kids so in anger he had acted out and slept with his secretary and that's how Marcie came to be. Like I said, ironic. When he told Nora's mom she lost her mind, literally, and they put her in a mental hospital where she still lives. To save face her dad kept Nora and later married the secretary who was just as money hungry as he was and looking to climb the pathetic social ladder of the "upper crest". He blamed Nora for what happened to her mom instead of his actions and he never failed to tell her that. Her step-mom hated her because she looked just like her mom and was a waste of space and money that could go towards her and Marcie in her opinion. I was the only person Nora had, the only family she had and I wasn't ever going to turn my back on her or let anyone come between us. No matter what happened, Nora would be my number one priority.**

"**Of course I promise. I can't remember a day you weren't my best friend nothing is going to change that or take me away from you." I reassured her before trying to lighten the mood with a joke. "I can't help that I'm so full of charm that all the girls want me." I flashed her the grin I used when I was flirting, hoping to make her crack up.**

"**You're more harm then charm, Patch." She laughed.**

"**Mom and dad will be home for dinner you should come and eat with us. You know they love and miss you. It's been a week since they last got to see you." I added hoping that she wouldn't spend the whole night on the phone with Scott.**

"**I'll see what I can do." She smiled and I knew I had won her over. She loved my parents as much as I did and that was with everything in me. There wasn't anything not to love about my parents. They were as loving as they were successful and they were amazingly successful. I couldn't have better parents. Sure they worked a lot, too much even, but when they were home they showered me with love and attention. They knew that Nora had it rough at home, they didn't know exactly how rough, they didn't know about her frequent middle of the night sleep overs even after all these years but Nora was like the daughter they'd never been able to have. They'd tried for a long time to have a girl, a sister for me, but that just wasn't in the cards so Nora was a sort of surrogate daughter to them who just happened to need and love them as much as they needed and loved her.**

…**...**

_**NORA**_

_**I slammed my math book shut and glanced at the clock. Almost six. My dad would be home soon and I didn't really want to see him. I had my homework done and had talked to Scott for two hours. Scott. I smiled thinking about him. Vee and I had been crushing on him for a while now but he asked me out first. Vee is a few pounds past curvy with minky blond hair and emerald green eyes. I had been worried it might ruin our friendship when I told her he had asked me out but she had squealed and got all excited about being able to finally talk boys with me, like we didn't already. Vee was more into them then I was though. She had already made it to first base but she wasn't a slut like my sister. The thought of Marcie threatened to ruin my good mood. When I got to school today I'd found maxi-pads and tampons glued all over my locker. I was mortified! Then I found out from Vee, who was in the bathroom hiding in a stall devouring one of her favorite doughnuts out of the site of anorexic girls like Marcie, when she over heard my sisters friends laughing about watching her do it. Scott had saved the day when he asked me out at lunch. Patch has a strong dislike for Scott. He says he reminds him of my dad and he HATES my dad with good cause. I don't see my dad in Scott, I mean Scott's tall like my dad and strong like my dad but I trust Scott and I don't trust my dad. I glanced at the clock again. Five after six, I could still make it to Patch's house for dinner.**_

_**When I was old enough to learn to ride a bike it was Patch's dad who taught me how. When I started bleeding at his house the first time and panicked it was Patch's mom that explained my menstrual cycle to me. As far as I was concerned his parents were my parents. I probably would have ended up eating with Patch anyhow but when he said his parents would be home I knew for sure I would be there. Even though it had only been a week I missed them like it had been a year.**_

_**It's finally Friday and I have my first date ever with Scott. Vee is coming over to help me get ready even though I know it must be hard on her to see us together. When we were younger I didn't like Scott he was mean to me always picking on me but now that we're older things are different. I'm excited and nervous about the date, we're going to the movies together. I tried to talk to Patch about my anxiety after dinner two nights ago, the day Scott had asked me out but his parents had found out that day that he switched the R key on the teachers computer with the A key so that everything she. typed came out wrong. It had taken her the whole day to figure out what was wrong and about five seconds to blame Patch. I could tell his parents found it as funny as I had by the twinkle in their eyes but they still had parental duty so Patch got his cell phone taken away which left him in a bad mood and when I brought up my date with Scott...well let's just say his mood was even worse when I left. The next day though that new kid, Rixon, came to class and for reason's beyond me they hit it off. It's not that I don't like him having other friends it's just that Rixon makes me uncomfortable, he gives me these weird looks when Patch and Vee aren't looking and he thinks I'm not paying attention. I see them out of the corner of my eyes and it kinda creeps me out. Vee thinks he's the greatest thing since sweets were invented. Maybe it's just his accent, he's from Ireland. Whatever it is I hope he likes her as much as she likes him and he stops giving me those creepy looks. **_

…_**...**_


	3. Chapter 3- FIFTEEN YEARS OLD

_**CHAPTER 3**_

_**FIFTEEN YEARS OLD**_

_**PATCH**_

**Today was Nora's fifteenth birthday. Vee threw a big birthday party for her which worked in my favor because as part of my birthday present to Nora I released a hundred crickets into her sister Marcie's bedroom. That should keep the self appointed beauty queen from her beauty sleep and it was paybacks for her putting the moves on Nora's boyfriend Scott. I didn't have proof yet, but her boyfriend and her sister sure ended up in empty halls and exciting empty rooms a lot together. I couldn't say for sure yet he was cheating on Nora, but my hunch was that he was and even worse, it was with her arch enemy, her sister who'd been making her life hell since I was old enough to remember. **

**Nora and Scott have been a couple since we were twelve and in all this time I hadn't grown to like him any better, in fact, I liked him even less. Scott wasn't the smartest tool in the shed, unlike Nora who excelled in school and was on the student newspaper. Nora was the sweet and innocent type that would probably wait for that "special moment" before losing her virginity. Unlike me who lost it at thirteen. I know, I was too young to be messing around like that but I was mature for my age and what can I say, I like living life hard in the fast lane. I wanted Nora's first time to be special though not like mine. Being a virgin wasn't cool and my hormones have been in over drive since I turned twelve and discovered girls as the opposite sex and not just annoying, whiny inconveniences. I doubted Scott cared if Nora's first time was five minutes of fumbling disaster like mine had been, (it's been improved to the point that my phone rings off the hook and every girl wants me to be their first time which means I score a new date every night of the week if I want) or sappy with the candles, flowers and romance that girls our age and older drool over. Personally, I couldn't care less what the girls who sleep with me want, I'm in it for my own good time but thinking it would be anything less than perfect for Nora made me want to punch things. When I thought about Scott touching her I'd have to take to the gym to work out my aggression on the punching bag so I wouldn't rearrange that perfectly preppy face of his. Scott may be strong and athletic but I was stronger and quicker. There would never be a fair fight between us. Scott's just lucky that Nora and I are only friends, that I'm not into her as more than that. No sooner had I thought that that the party began to replay unwelcome in my head. It was a costume party and Nora had dressed in a red devil's outfit which I found amusing at first, given how naive she was about somethings. She was more an angel than a devil, she was MY angel. She even eats all organic and writes poetry that no one knows about but me. I say at first though because that damn outfit had me thinking things no best friend should think about their friend, even if they were the opposite sex. Especially when said best friend has a very frequent need to sneak into your room for first aid from an abusive dad or just to be able to get some sound sleep because she feels safe with you. **

**From the time puberty had hit through now I had tried to keep a little more body space between us and get up before she did in the morning, pretending that I had developed the need to get up much earlier so that I could impress the girls. Truth was, I was hiding in the bathroom so she wouldn't see the body reaction every male has first thing in the morning. I didn't want to freak her out. I had dressed as a fallen angel, all black clothes, black mask and black wings and all night long my eyes had been falling away from whatever girl was blabbering to me back to rest on Nora. It was like I had discovered she was a girl for the first time. I blame it on the outfit. It was like she was trying to make a statement and she had succeeded. None of the guys could take their eyes off of her. I'd bet money that Vee helped her pick it out. It was a metallic red spandex jumper with a zipper up the front that stopped high enough to not be obscene but low enough to notice that somewhere along the line she had developed cleavage. It hugged all of her light curves, she wasn't curvy like Vee who had more curves than a roller coaster, Nora had more of a slight build like a runner but she wasn't stick straight. She was proportioned just right and the eye catching spandex had shown it and when she decided to pair it with what I called "come fuck me" heels she was a show stopper and the problem was my body was reacting to the show in ways it shouldn't be. I closed my eyes trying to block it out but it was no good the image of her was burned into my mind. I looked down at my traitorous body in disgust. There was no way I would be getting any sleep without dealing with that. I firmly gripped the base of my erection and tried to conjure up the face of one of my many conquests. It wasn't working my mind kept going back to Nora, her soft gray eyes sparkling in amusement at my latest prank on Marcie, the way her lips would curve up as she tried to stop her smile, they were so perfect just begging to be kissed. Then I saw her face the way she looked in her outfit tonight, all confident and sexy with a wicked mischievous smile I'd never seen on her. She looked like she had been transformed, ready to take on the world or lead an army. I pictured slowly unzipping her jumper letting my hand brush over every centimeter of skin as I uncovered it. She was wearing a black lace push up bra that only covered half her breasts. I gripped my cock a little rougher applying just the right amount of pressure. The knot in my stomach was getting tighter. I stopped for a moment to admire them, brushing my thumb over each one making the already hardened peak even harder. I bent and sucked one into my mouth then the other making her whimper and arch her chest as her fingers found their way to my hair and pulled me closer. The sound she made shot through me like lightening straight to my crotch. I pulled back and gently blew on each nipple making her moan before I placed a gentle kiss on it and continued peeling her costume off her body. Her stomach was firm and her skin creamy and I couldn't help but trail kisses all over it. I had to hold back a groan at the matching barely there black panties she was wearing. Where had this she-devil come from? When I reached her ankles she stepped out of it and I rose to capture her lips in a heated kiss. No sooner had a pulled back for each of us to catch our breath when she gave me an evil grin and dropped to her knee's in front of me. My hand started sliding faster up and down my shaft, my thumb swiping over the head and across the slit where the thought of having her run the tip of her tongue over the sensitive nerves underneath and all around it had me weeping pre-cum. I couldn't hold in the groan that escaped as my mind created the image of her wrapping her pouty lips around me and sucking me in her mouth. I could practically feel the heated moister as she pulled back running her teeth gently but firmly down my pulsing cock. I couldn't help it, my hands found their way to her soft hair and wrapped around the length pulling her closer again as I thrust into her mouth but not hard enough to gag or hurt her. She hummed her approval and the vibration I could almost feel pulled the knot so tight I knew I was seconds from cumming. My eyes squeezed shut and my hips were moving in time with my hand that was vigorously pumping and squeezing my cock, relentlessly chasing my orgasm. She was bobbing her head up and down me faster now as we moved together, sucking hard like I was her favorite dessert at the same time her tongue was dancing wicked circles and lines up and down my throbbing shaft. I knew it was almost over when my body began to tremble and I was breathing in short gasps groaning in a way that seemed to urge her on. My other hand slid down to massage my tightened balls and she hummed her pleasure, that was the end of me, my body stiffened and my hips jolted forward unbidden as she took me all the way to the base, my head hit the back of her throat and she swallowed as my hands held her there I shot loads of my hot cum down her throat in a geyser that she continued to swallow eagerly like her favorite milkshake until the last of my seed had been spent and my orgasm had fully subsided and she pulled back making sure not to waste a drop of me before meeting my pitch black half shut eyes with her smoldering gray ones. I looked down and the evidence of my mental molestation of my best friend was all over my hand and my toned abs. What the hell had I just done?**

**...**

_**NORA**_

_**I opened my eyes and stretched, looking around Vee's room I couldn't help but be happy. Last night had been amazing even though my party had been crashed by some out of control punks, (that I'm positive will feel the wrath of Patch and were probably sent courtesy of Marcie) I had accomplished what I had set out to do when I told Vee what I wanted for my birthday: a total make-over. Not the hair and make-up kind, though that had been a part of it, no this was a total revamp. From this day forward I would no longer be only quiet blend into the crowd Nora I was going for broke and cutting loose a little. My whole life has been spent under the thumb of my ruthless father and in the shadow of my anorexic manipulative popular sister. I wasn't looking for head cheerleader popularity or popularity at all, I was focused on confidence and fun. I had spent the last two weeks thinking about what I wanted for my birthday when Vee asked and this is what I'd come up with. Everyone around me had fun and it was time I had some too. Gone are the days and nights spent as a slave to school and a slave to my dad and evil sister. Patch had been having fun reeking havoc on people since our first day at school, Vee was out going loud and somewhat obnoxious with a knack for being sly. Scott had football and weight-lifting and he played bass in a band called Serendipity at the local hangout The Devils Handbag. Even Rixon had fun hanging out at Bo's Arcade now that he was old enough to get in he would play for bets. Starting yesterday I was a brand new Nora and all eyes had been on me much to Marcie's dismay and I had a sick feeling in my stomach that even the new Nora would feel her wrath, difference was New Nora was also going to start dishing it right back...with a little help from someone with experience. Yes today was a fresh start and I was ready.**_

_**There was one thing that had me feeling a little bit off. Last night at the party I kept seeing Patch give me the strangest looks, looks that I couldn't place. He's my best friend, my family, my confidant and my guardian angel all in one. There's no secrets between us, well, more accurately there isn't anything I can't talk to him about or that he can't talk to me about which means we can pretty much read each others minds. He's better at it than me but I'm getting better all the time. So it's just a little weird that I can't put a name or emotion with the look he had on his face. He is a master of disguise though. Maybe he didn't like my outfit. He isn't use to seeing me in anything but jeans and a sweater or sweat shirt in the winter and just a plain top in warmer weather. Nothing fancy, nothing real feminine and definitely nothing sexy. Maybe I didn't look as good as I thought I did? I should ask Patch when I see him what was wrong. I don't care what anyone else thinks besides Vee and Patch but if he didn't like it I wanted to know. It couldn't have been offensive to him because hey, this was PATCH who oozed sex appeal with every breath he took.**_


	4. Chapter 4- The New Nora

**CHAPTER 4**

**THE NEW NORA**

_**PATCH**_

_BEEP BEEP BEEP..._

**I reached over and slammed my hand down on my alarm clock. I must have forgotten to turn it on the radio setting after the party. The party. I groaned, I didn't want to think about it. It had plagued me all night long. First it was that damn outfit making my body react to Nora in a way I was DIFINATELY NOT comfortable with. After two hours of tossing and turning with the image of her in it burned into my head and my cock as hard as the moment I had first laid eyes on her wearing it I had caved to relieving the throbbing ache left in my groin. I had tried to conjure up pictures of the hottest girls I'd been with but that hadn't worked. I dug out some girly magazines, still my mind slid back to her. With school looming in the morning I had given in and found relief in a full blown fantasy of her and then I had to face the disgust I had in myself. Now I had to face her at school and to say I wasn't looking forward to it would be the understatement of the century. Had it been any other girl, and I mean ANY other girl I couldn't have given a damn but this was my best friend, the one who trusted me and I had used her to get myself off. If she ever found out that could be the end of our friendship and I wasn't willing to let that happen. No, this was a one time deal. Never again would I allow myself permission to violate her that way. It wasn't that I didn't have respect for other girls, I just didn't have the same level of respect. If they wanted to put out who was I to stop them? If they wanted to dress in a way that begged for them to be undressed well hell, I'd start with undressing them with my eyes and see where my good looks and charm got me. Nora wasn't one of those girls though. She had self respect and I admired that in her. That was the other thing about her party. The way guys were looking at her, the same way I had looked at her made me want to cover her back up and beat them all for thinking of her like some cheap sex object. If that made me a hypocrite so be it. I didn't necessarily have a problem with her dressing how she wanted, I just wasn't accustomed to the looks she was getting. Nora has always been pretty, beautiful even, but last night she was also sexy. The way the metallic in the red made her curves stand out in the lights, the way that her innocent angelic face looked with her hair in loose curls framing it. The red natural highlights in it stood out against red glittery horns she was wearing giving her a decidedly naughty look. Then there was her make up, dark enough to fit with her costume but light enough that she didn't look like a common street whore that would've been easy with an costume like that. Her lips were colored with a medium lipstick that I would hate any other day, she really didn't need make-up she's a goddess without it, but in that outfit it had given her lips the hottest little pout, they looked so soft so full I can almost feel them...SHIT! I have to stop thinking this way! I shook my head hard trying to get those images out of my head and bolted for a much needed cold shower.**

**I looked around the high school campus, good no Nora, I had a few more minutes to collect myself. I had cranked the stereo up in my jeep as loud as I could when I got in and quickly hit the skip button when Nickleback came on singing 'I like your pants around your feet, I like the dirt that's on your knee's, I like the way you look when your looking up at me you're like my favorite damn disease.' Great. All I needed was a song called Figured You Out which is exactly what I was hoping to avoid along with the picture my over active imagination had created of her looking up at me last night. It only took me that one part to switch the song to something heavy metal with lots of screaming and guitars so that I could fill my head with something else, anything else but that. **

**The thing I had going for me was how good I could be at masking things and avoiding things. Nora thought she could read me pretty well, it's true she could better than anyone else and she had been improving she was far from being accurate consistently so the chance of her guessing what had been plaguing me was little to nothing. That should have been a huge comfort, the fact I had to hide anything from her though made me queezy.**

**I was standing in the hall outside of the bathroom the first time I spotted Nora coming down the hall towards me. She looked different. Not last night different, but different. I couldn't pin point what it was but acting on instinct not thought I ducked into the bathroom where I was confronted with something that made me pissed. There on every bathroom stall door was Nora's number with the words 'Looking to unleash my devil within, for a sinfully good time call xxx-xxxx' in her sister Marcie's handwriting. That bitch!**

…**...**

_**NORA**_

_**I needed to talk to Patch. I grabbed Vee's arm and drug her across the crowded lunch room to where I had spotted him. Before I could get a word out Vee was up in his face accusing him of writing my name in the boys bathroom. **_

"_**I hope you're happy!" Vee screeched, green eyes blazing.**_

"_**As a matter of fact I am. Thanks for being concerned." Patch smirked at her.**_

"_**I'm not concerned. How could you? How could you do that to Nora, you're best friend?!"**_

_**Patch's face flashed something that looked like shock and guilt before instantly settling back into his perfect mask. That had to just be in my head, he wouldn't have done anything to me that he should feel guilty about and there was no way in hell he would do that to me. No, I knew who was behind the latest attack. Marcie. Before I could jump in, Vee was yelling some more.**_

"_**It's always you, you're behind everything! Every time something like this happens its..." I cut her off. **_

"_**It wasn't Patch, Vee, it was Marcie. I heard two of the girls from her cheer leading squad laughing about it so just chill. I have an idea to even the score. I'm going to need both of you guys to help though." I looked at both of them.**_

"_**What do you need me to do, Angel?" Patch asked.**_

"_**First I need Vee to print up fliers with Marcie's number advertising stripper services. Then Patch, I need you to distribute them with a 'personal referral' since guys seem to want to imitate you and I'm going to post them at the mall and a few other places. Maybe we can get HER phone ringing like mine has been. If she wants to play I'll play. No more nice little Nora."**_

_**Patch had a look of amusement and admiration. "Hell ya, it's about time you paid her back and I like it. Way to go!" I had to smile. I knew he'd be on board with me but seeing the look of pride boosted my confidence even more. I liked new Nora.**_

"_**Anything for you babe." Vee grinned. **_

"_**Thanks Vee, I knew I could count on you guys." I know I shouldn't feel good about what I was about to do but this was Marcie. "Vee, I need to talk to Patch alone for a minute."**_

"_**But.." She started to argue, shooting suspicious looks between Patch and me.**_

"_**It doesn't have anything to do with you , I'm not leaving you out of anything I just need to ask Patch about something." I tried to reassure her.**_

"_**Fine, I'll be at our table, if there aren't any Krispy Kreams left when you get there don't say I didn't warn you."**_

"_**What did you want to ask me, Angel?" Patch assessed me with cool eyes.**_

"_**I wanted to ask you if you were okay last night." I fidgeted.**_

"_**Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" His voice was smooth as glass. Almost too smooth.**_

"_**I don't know, you seemed...off. Like you didn't want to be there."**_

"_**Of course I wanted to be there. Where else would I rather be then there with you? Spit it out Grey, what's really on your mind?" Damn he was good.**_

"_**When I came out in my costume you had a look on your face I've never seen before. I don't want to be invisible anymore, I want to have fun like everyone else but I don't want to look or act like Marcie, I don't want you to lose your approval. If my costume or anything is over the top I want you to tell me."**_

"_**You don't need my approval or anyone else approval, Nora. You of all people deserve to have fun and it wasn't over the top, what was over the top was Marcie's outfit. I wasn't the only person there, especially guy's thinking that her skirt was more a tube top stretched down over her bony body and the only thing keeping it there was gravity. You're was..." I waited for him to continue, when he didn't I prodded him.**_

"_**Mine was what, Patch?" I could hear the slight sound of anxiety in my voice that I was feeling. He said he'd tell me if it was too much but he was good at saying things without saying things. I knew he wouldn't lie to me , that didn't mean he wouldn't take an indirect route. Sometimes talking to him was like trying to figure out riddles. Very frustrating. **_

"_**...Not something I've ever seen you in before. It just took me a little by surprise. Nothing bad, nothing wrong with it it was just...different on you." His voice cracked for a second I thought when he was talking but he recovered so fast I couldn't be sure I hadn't just heard wrong.**_

"_**Okay, good. I feel better now." I smiled. "Let the games begin." Patch laughed and joined me at the table so I could scarf some lunch before the bell rang.**_

_**I had a late start this morning, missed my usual ride with Patch who had his license and a car since he was older than me, then I had the non stop text's and calls courtesy of my sister, in the end my day hadn't been so bad. Vee had the flier's printed by the end of school by pretending she was working on a project on behalf of the school newspaper and teacher, all that was left was distributing them.**_


	5. Chapter 5- Christmas

**CHAPTER 5**

**CHRISTMAS**

**PATCH**

**I was sitting on our black leather couch waiting for the doorbell to ring. It was Christmas day and every Christmas since Nora was five she had spent the day with my family, ****_our _****family. Her dad preferred her at our house, out of sight out of mind. They had a big gathering of family and friends at their house every year with a big feast, Nora wasn't welcome.**

**Her dad wasn't home much anymore, some club he belonged to or was President of was taking up most of his time. That was probably a good thing since Nora had changed so much after her birthday. I still hadn't placed what had changed so much over night that would cause me to have the response to her I was suffering from. I say suffering because it was like pushing a boulder up hill on an almost vertical mountain to keep my thoughts of her...innocent. I had listened to more bands like Slip Knot and Lamb of God than I had ever intended to in a lifetime in hopes that their racket would keep my mind occupied enough that I wouldn't be mentally stripping my best friend of her clothes every five minutes. Don't get me started on how many ice cold showers I had been taking since October. I use to only go out on the weekends with girls, now it's several nights a week on top of that. My theory was that if I cured the lust with enough sex then maybe my imagination wouldn't run so wild. Ya right. **

**I glanced up at the clock, Nora should be here in the next five minutes. I finished helping my mom set the table, gave her a kiss on the top of her head, at almost sixteen I was already towering her at nearly six feet tall, and went to get the gifts I had for Nora to place underneath our tree. One of them was a long black perfect feather. I didn't know where it had come from but I knew that Nora was meant to have it. On our first Christmas that she had spent the day with us I had wanted to give her something special. I wasn't quite six yet so my mom and dad had helped me pick out a nice gift for her. I don't remember what it was now I just remember that I hadn't been satisfied with it. I wanted something for Nora from ****_ME_****. I had thought about coloring her a picture like my dad had suggested but art really wasn't my thing. My mom said she'd help me bake cookies, that DEFINITELY wasn't my thing. I liked cookies as much as the next kid but baking? Me? Baking and me didn't belong in the same sentence. For days I had moped around trying to think of something. I had gone for a walk the day before Christmas sad that I hadn't been able to come up with anything when I saw a feather. I had picked it up and stroked it between my fingers and across my cheek. It was silky soft and smokey gray just like Nora's eyes and that's when it came to me, I would give Nora the feather. It was perfect like her. No missing or bent strands, not even a speck of dirt on it. It was like it had been placed there just for me to find. That had started a tradition of ours. Every Christmas since then I have given her a gift and a feather different from all the others before it. So far she had feathers from a peacock, one from an albino peacock, scarlet macaw, painted bunting, red cardinal, an American kestrel, lorikeet and one from both a northern and southern blue jay among others I had carefully located and had shipped in if they weren't found locally. They had to be perfect though or I refused to give them to her, nothing but the best for my angel. The oddest thing had happened yesterday though, I had picked up a blue feather from a hyacinth macaw the day before but when I woke up in the morning there was this perfect black feather, the kind of black that rivaled midnight like the color of my hair and eyes. It was long, too long for any bird that I knew of and it wasn't fake, it hadn't been dyed. I had no idea how it had gotten. I searched online for any bird it might have belonged to but nothing came up with feathers anywhere near as long as this one or black like it. The closest thing I could compare it too was...the angel wings on my costume I had worn to Nora's party which was ludicrous because there was just no way that that was an angel's feather. This one was the same length, shape and color as my wings had been, the only difference besides it not being dyed or synthetic was that the black was unearthly black and it glistened in the light.**

**I had just finished placing the boxed and wrapped mysterious feather along with my other gift for her under the tree when Nora rang the bell. When I opened the door my breath hitched in my throat at the sight of her. Before me was a smiling girl I almost didn't recognize, how was it that she kept shocking me in a matter of months? First it was the red she-devil costume, then it was her plan to get back at Marcie for the next day fiasco, which by the way, had worked like a charm only better. Marcie had to change her phone number several times since somehow (no idea how) her new unlisted numbers kept getting around as a number for a cheap stripper for private parties. Since then every time Marcie has come up with an attack on Nora she's been either quick with a plan or quick to go with one of mine. She had started dressing a little bit differently too, a little bit more feminine and it hadn't failed to go unnoticed. That seemed to be an issue for Scott leaving me the impression him and I might be having a little chat here real soon. Then there was right now, standing before me with eyes twinkling and cheeks all rosy was Nora in a red velvet Santa dress that, unlike most that were almost indecently short, came down to just above her knees in a flair that was bordered with white fir. The top was cut to fit so it was just two inches on top of her shoulders leaving most of them and her neck revealed and it was bordered with matching white fur. My eyes couldn't help but follow the slope of her shoulders and the curve of her neck that was so elegantly exposed. The bodice fit snug to her and was cinched at the waist with a shiny black belt. She had a matching Santa hat on over her long curly hair and instead of a coat she had a matching cape complete with red velvet and white fur. On her feet were a pair of white Uggs with, big surprise, white fur and white puff balls on the front. She was a Christmas vision and suddenly my tight black jeans just got almost painfully tighter. This was going to be a long Christmas day. I wasn't IN love with my best friend but I certainly was suddenly in lust for her. I ushered her in and after a quick hug, long enough for me to feel her full breasts (where had those come from again?!) pressed against my chest she turned to greet my parents. I took a second to close my eyes, take a deep breath and pinch the bridge of my nose in preparation for the headache inducing battle of my brain and body I was now going to have to endure.**

…**...**

_**NORA**_

_**I got up feeling the excitement bubbling in me. I couldn't wait to spend the day with Patch and his parents. It wasn't just about avoiding my house and my so called family, it was really about spending the holiday with those I loved and the one's I loved just happened to live next door with a different last name.**_

_**I had bought a new outfit just for this occasion which I've never done before. I've always just dressed in whatever nice sweater I had and a pair of nice pants. This Christmas was my first one since my make-over and I splurged on myself. Once I had my new outfit on and somewhat tamed my unruly curls so that my Santa hat would stay on and look good. I put on a light lip gloss, a little mascara and called it good. Looking in the mirror I saw the reflection of the happiness I felt. I couldn't wait to give everyone my gifts. Each year Patch and I get each other something special and Patch gives me a feather. I never know what kind or color to expect, it's always a surprise and always breathtakingly beautiful. I have each one labeled and displayed in shadow boxes with black frames around my room. I wanted to show them off but also preserve them. Every time I'm in my room I can look at any one of them and be reminded of how great a bond I have with Patch. No matter what happens I know that he'll be by my side and that he'll always love me.**_

_**This year for my gift to him I had located my favorite pictures of us for the last four years, one from each year. This years pick was of me and him at my birthday party in our costumes. He had looked so...hot? Sexy? Both, definitely both. Not that I was paying attention, I had overheard all the girls at the party talking about how his black jeans fit him so perfectly hugging his derriere and only leaving just enough to the imagination of what lies behind the zipper of said jeans to keep them longing for him all night. His black Henley hugged his muscular upper body that I happened to know hid a set of very sculpted abdominal and pectoral muscles, not that I had ever paid any attention to that either... His sleeves had been pushed up to just below his impressive biceps that were large but not so large as to look unsightly. His black mask accented and brought focus to his blacker than midnight raven hair that was slightly longer and curled at the bottom of his neck. I could only imagine it would feel silky under...**__Crap!__** He's my best friend, none of that kind of thinking! I won't allow it! I have a boyfriend, a very handsome boyfriend that any of the girls would love to have, including my sister. A boyfriend I was starting to have problems with. As good looking as Scott was didn't have Patch's matching black onyx eyes and his smile that was both sexy and held the promise of trouble. Just thinking about him now looking like...ugh I really need to get some better control of my mind. Directing my thoughts back to my gift and not his costume I smiled at the idea that had come to me to put all the things I loved about him in elegant script on the matte around the pictures. Things like his sense of humor, his funny but annoyingly arrogant remarks, his loyalty and protectiveness. There were so many things I loved about him that I had ran out of space to write them all. I hoped he would like it as much as I did. I glanced at the clock, five minutes till two, the time I was supposed to be at the Cipriano house for dinner. I gave Vee a quick call wishing her and her mom a very Merry Christmas then put on my boots and cape and made the trek through the snow to next door.**_

_**Dinner had been great. We had turkey and ham with all of the trimmings followed by pumpkin, pecan and apple pie. I'm not sure who Mrs. Cipriano thought she was feeding but she cooked for an army. It must be their Italian roots showing through. After the beautiful meal they had set on a candle lit table decorated with Christmas boughs, ribbon and glass vase style containers filled with dusty pearl blue Christmas bulbs decorated with silver glitter we moved into the family room for our gift exchange. The only gift I had gotten from my family was a car like Marcie, the difference was she got a brand new Toyota four runner and I got a ford festiva...Not that I'm not thankful for a set of wheels, but when mine needs to be flint stoned hers will be purring away without foot power. The most meaningful gifts come from Patch and his parents anyways. This year I had gotten a black feather that was of unknown origin and a pillow which, funny enough, had the picture of us on it and he had written his favorite things about me around it. It was the picture of us at my party. We had a good laugh over that coincidence and I told Patch it was the best gift to date aside from the feathers each year that I had ever gotten and I had meant it. There was no way I would sleep on that pillow but it would remain next to me on my bed where I could gaze at the moment in time that I had changed to be a better and stronger person with him by my side. I could also read all of the kind things he had to say about me whenever I was feeling a little bit down or just needed to see them affirmed. His parents had given me a locket with a picture of all of them that matched a gold watch they gave to Patch and finally I got a pair of diamond earrings from all of them. When all of that had been done I had changed into pants and a sweat shirt and Patch, his parents and I all went outside and made snow angels. Patch said he always knew I was an angel and there was his proof. I had rolled my eyes and tried to hold back a laugh but when he winked at me and gave me his mischievous smile before tackling me into the snow I couldn't hold it back anymore and after shoving snow in each others clothes and face he helped me up and into the house for hot chocolate by their fire. It had been a spectacular and memorable day. **_

_**I fell into bed replaying all the day's events knowing sleep would quickly be carrying me away but with each image came an unwelcome one of him greeting me at the door looking all sexy and an expression that looked an awful lot like...desire.**_

_**Suddenly I'm laying in a field of wild flowers on a blanket with the sun beating down on me. I was still slightly chilled by the cool breeze blowing but nothing that the sun wasn't evening out. I closed my eyes to absorb the feeling of the rays and the scent of the flowers. A small shiver runs through me as a gust blows by for a moment leaving goosebumps on my arms. Suddenly a shadow appears over me and my eyes snap open in shock just in time for me to hear a voice I would be able to pick out from anywhere. It's so deep so velvety it can only belong to one person. Patch.**_

"_**You look cold, Angel. I bet I could warm you up." He gives me a devilish grin.**_

_**I laugh and close my eyes again before speaking now that my heart has returned to normal knowing I'm safe because he's here. "I think the sun will do just fine if I give it a minute."**_

"_**Now where would the fun be in that?" Before I can answer I feel the slight weight of his body above mine as he holds it in a hover so we are just barely touching and he leans down and gently bites my ear lobe. "That would be no fun at all." I hear him chuckle and the vibrations of it shoot from his body to mine and south.**_

"_**Umm...Patch?" I know we shouldn't be doing this but for the life of me I can't remember why because his lips have moved from my ear lobe down the right side of my neck and back up to where he places a love bite on my chin before continuing up to place gentle kisses on my forehead, each of my eyelids, my nose and the corners of my lips before covering them with his own running the tip of his tongue seductively along my bottom lip asking permission to enter. Without thinking about it my lips part and his tongue begins to dance with mine. We explore every nook and cranny of each others mouth and run our tongues along each other gaining more familiarity with each other than we've ever had. His lips are both soft and full of promises at the same time. The pressure of them is perfect and I feel myself moan softly into his mouth and he echo's my feelings of contentment with a sound of his own. When all of our oxygen is spent he pulls back slightly.**_

"_**You had something you wanted to say, Angel?" He asks me. Again, before I can collect my thoughts enough to know what it was I feel his breath on my skin as he starts a trail of heated kisses over to my left ear where he delicately licks the shell before placing a butterfly bite on it then leaving and burning a fire path down to my collar bone where he places more nips. My hands find his hair and it's as silky as I had imagined it to be. No, that's not right, it's even softer. I hold him to me. My breath is starting to come in shallower gasps and his lips continue across my shoulder to the strap of my spaghetti strap tank top. He slides it down my shoulder and his head dips lower so that he's kissing all along the top of breasts across to my other shoulder.**_

_**I feel his body slide down lower and the hem of my shirt inching up under the guidance of his thumbs that he's ghosting along my flushed and over sensitive skin. **_

"_**I love it when you blush. That color looks good on you." He follows the path of my top with his lips placing tender and loving kisses all over my flat stomach and along each rib until I literally feel an inferno burning under my skin and each kiss is stoking it higher and higher.**_

"_**I want it off." He whispers huskily in a voice warning of promises only he can fill.**_

"_**Mmmhmm.." I start to raise up just enough so that he can slip it off of me when...**_

_BEEP...BEEP...BEEP...BEEP_

_**I sit up in bed struggling to find my alarm and shut that hideous sound off so I can bury myself back under my comforter where Sco...I bolt upright in my bed. THAT was not Scott that was Patch! I was mere seconds away from being topless in front of my lifelong friend! I buried my head in a pillow and flopped backwards down onto my bed. **__Get it together Nora. I don't what the hell that was but you better stop that right now before you destroy the friendship you have with him. Friendship before lust, friendship before lust..._


	6. Chapter 6- New Years Eve

…_..._

**CHAPTER 6**

**NEW YEARS EVE**

_**PATCH**_

**Stepping out of the shower I towel dried off before slipping into a pair of dark blue jeans and a royal blue Henley. Sitting on the edge of my bed I slid my feet into a pair of black Harley Davidson motorcycle boots. One last look in the mirror and a quick run of my fingers through my hair I grabbed my leather jacket and set out across my yard on the well worn path to Nora's house to pick her up. We were meeting Rixon, who was dating Vee now which I hadn't fully come to terms with, and Scott much to my dismay. I was flying solo meaning I could work the crowd without being tied down until some girl caught my eye. **

**I stepped up to Nora's door posed to knock, before I did I took a deep breath. ****_Please please please don't be wearing something that's going to keep me distracted all night. I need one night, just one night not filled with uncontrolled thoughts of you._**

**Christmas day in her little Christmas costume had nearly killed me. I had made the mistake when we sat down at the table of noticing how much I liked her better without anything on her lips and had brushed my thumb across them to wipe her gloss off. "You don't need that" I'd told her. Truth was, I hadn't needed THAT. From the moment my thumb connected with the silky skin of her lip a bolt of electricity had ricocheted through my body straight down to my favorite appendage. As if my pants had not been tight enough, as if my mind couldn't already keep my hands from touching her, I had gone and done that leaving me with what I thought was going to be a permanent zipper imprint. **

**Who knew what she'd have in store for me, what outfit she'd come up with to turn me on, I mean Scott on tonight. I let out a silent groan I raised my hand as prepared as I could be for whatever lied behind that door.**

**I heard Nora's approaching footsteps as she hollered that she was leaving and Marcie's smart ass remark asking if she thought they cared. That one was going to cost her I promised myself. I knew that Nora wasn't fully invested in Marcie's opinion of her, especially now, but I knew her well enough to know she had a big heart and those little digs on some level cost her. I'd never be okay with that. The door swung open and much to my great relief Nora had answered my prayer and was wearing a dark pair of jeans like mine, don't get me wrong they were clinging to places that I wanted to...****_FUCK! NOT AGAIN! THERE JUST A PAIR OF JEANS FOR CHRIST SAKE GET A GRIP PATCH! _****I closed my eyes for a moment counting slowly to ten when I heard her giggle. What was so funny about this? Couldn't she see what she was doing to me? Of course not, my face was the perfect shield. Thank God for small miracles. I opened my eyes and asked her what was so funny. Looking me head to toe in a full body scan that heated me up under her gaze she answered when she was done accessing me.**

"**We match." I looked down shocked I hadn't noticed that indeed she was wearing dark jeans, a royal blue Henley with the only difference being she had black high tops on and I had boots. She even had her black leather jacket with her. **

"**We really have to stop doing this. If we start dressing the same people are going to think we're one of 'those' couples now." She laughed.**

"**If you don't like it, I could take it off." I went for my old ally of flirtation when my heart skipped a beat at the word couple and hoping she wouldn't notice me swallow when her eyes flickered for what felt like a moment to long on me. Confidence can be an excellent cover up so before she could say anything I gave her a wink and wrapped my arm around her shoulders urging her towards my jeep that I had left warming up for us. **

**I parked on the street by the Devil's Handbag and after flashing our fake ID's I'd scored us by winning one of countless games of pool at Bo's Arcade we scanned the packed room for any signs of the others. **

"**Over there, far left." Nora said leaning in close to my ear so I could hear her over the crowd. I followed her finger and gave a little wave to Rixon and a tight nod to Scott. **

"**I'm going to get something to drink, what would you like?" I asked her.**

"**Diet coke please."**

"**No cherry?" I asked surprised since that's what she usually drank.**

"**Saving the cherry for later." She winked. Winked at me! I couldn't miss the innuendo. She'd never joked about things like that, that was always my field of expertise.**

"**One diet coke hold the cherry coming right up." I smirked before weaving my way to the bar. I could almost feel the heat from her gaze which she must be boring into my back as I walked away. What the hell was going on between us? Or was it just my overactive imagination at work again? I needed a distraction. As I waited at the bar I scoped out the buffet before me. There were red heads, no not in the red head mood tonight, there was a girl with long black hair with a nice rack and round booty that looked very appealing and she could dance, maybe that was the one who would get my mind off things. Just to be sure I finished perusing the cluster of people when my eyes fell on a brunette. She looked like she was standing alone and her back was to me. Perfect so far. I couldn't really make out what she was wearing but I didn't think it would matter since she wouldn't be wearing it for long if I had my way. Something about her caught my eye and I couldn't peel them away. Finally. Finally a girl to take over the thoughts that had been consuming me, a girl that could put my friend back in her spot safely as just my friend and not my fantasy. Now all I had to do was..**

"**One beer and one diet coke." I heard the bartender say behind me.**

**I quickly paid, and looked back to find the girl so I could introduce myself but she was gone. I gave a slight growl low in my throat and searched the crowd once again only this time I had a target. She was about 5'5 so I could skip any girls too tall or shorter than that so that eliminated a fair share of them. Now I was looking for a brunette with soft curls that hung down her back in a kind of untamed manner just begging for my hand to be wrapped up in it while she...There! I spotted her, she was standing next to Rixon. That dirty bastard was moving in on...Wait, her body language is all wrong, she's leaning away from him and actually turning like she's looking for an escape route. That's great, no competition. Come on, come on turn this way just a little more so I can see if your as delicious as... Fucking A! No fucking way! Nora, that was Nora?! I gripped the bottle in my hand so tight it almost broke. I was really going to need this beer now underage or not. I didn't make a habit of drinking, in fact I didn't really like it so I wasn't quite sure why I had ordered it tonight but suddenly I was very very thankful I had as I made my way back to where she was still looking like she had just stolen something and needed a quick exit. Where was Scott? I slammed the beer and went to rescue the damsel in distress.**

"**Hey baby, looking for me?" I whispered from behind her, chuckling when she jumped which quickly turned to shock when she turned and threw her arms around me like she hadn't seen me in years not minutes.**

"**Patch! You're back! I thought you left me to go chase some ratchet girl in a short skirt and I was going to be stuck here dying of thirst listening to Rixon give me play by plays of all the fights you two have been in."**

"**I won't ever leave you, Angel, even if I'm gone for thirty minutes to an hour I'll always be back." I gave her a squeeze then gently pushed her back into a safer body space zone. "Ratchet? Since when do you use the word ratchet?" I chuckled again at the look on her face. **

"**I can use the word ratchet. Just because I'm not from the hood doesn't mean I can't call them as I see them." She had her chin jutted slightly out in challenge.**

"**That's kind of like a Catholic preacher telling his congregation not to kneel." I laughed. "It just doesn't sound right." **

"**Fine. I won't use ratchet it's just one of those bad things that suddenly doesn't seem quite so bad." She giggled and eyed me in a way that made me a little bit nervous.**

"**Words like ratchet aren't usually followed by giggles either, Angel." I teased her, choosing to ignore the look. "That's something girls normally tougher than you would say because it could easily provoke a fight."**

"**I can be tough! Are you saying I'm not tough? You've never seen me fight how do you know I can't?" Her eyes lit up in indignation. **

"**I don't, because you've never been IN a fight."**

"**So you're saying I'm not strong enough to win a fight?" Her voice was taking on an edge. Why is she suddenly so defensive?**

"**I haven't said anything about your strength. Strength doesn't always mean brute force. You don't have to kick ass to be a fighter. Violence doesn't equal strength." I explained.**

"**So what your saying is that to win a fight requires thought."**

"**That's one thing, yes. What's going through that pretty little head of yours?" I could see the wheels turning.**

"**I'm thinking. You know, a process where I use my brain to make rational decisions. Like the one's you apparently think I can't make." Oh boy. How had I ended up on the hot seat when I hadn't done anything? Somehow it was always me making her mad and frustrating her. It was kinda hot the way her eyes got all intense and her face flushed...**

"**I never said you couldn't, Nora, you've just never been taught how to think during a fight." I looked around eager for something to change the subject when I noticed Scott was still absent. "Where's Scott? Shouldn't he be here with you?"**

**She sighed and tilted her head towards the stage. "The bass player for the band got sick so they asked Scott to fill in for him." As soon as she'd said that the lights flickered on the stage and I saw him step up with the band and the music started to pound.**

"**Want to dance?" I asked her. It was New Years Eve, I came to party not watch her sulk. To my relief her anger at me must have subsided and she smiled up at me. We danced for quite a while, luckily the music so far had been fast paced. No sooner had I thought that that a slow song came on. Looks like my luck had ran out.**

**I pulled her in closer to me but I felt her stiffen. "What's the matter?"**

"**I don't have the body for this." She lifted her chin to a voluptuous woman nearby who was moving her body firmly against another guy giving a swivel to her hips against his on every up and downward motion she made. "No curves."**

**I held her gaze as I spoke. "Are you asking my opinion?" She had curves, they were just more the feminine goddess type then the sinfully wicked kind. That woman was the kind a man dreamed about for a one night stand, Nora's were the kind men hoped to have on the woman they asked their hand for. I hoped Scott appreciated what he had, truth was, I knew he didn't. I just hadn't had the heart to break it to Nora yet.**

"**No..I just.." She stammered and looked down. **

"**You just what?" I gently coaxed her to finish.**

"**I can't compete with that." Her voice shook just a fraction.**

"**Put your arms around my neck."**

"**What?"**

"**Just do what I said Nora, put your arms around my neck." I felt her slide them around me and I pulled her up against me rather shocked she had listened since under most situations she would refuse to do what I asked her to do. "Now close your eyes and just feel the music, feel the movement in my body. Don't think, just feel." I whispered in her ear. **

**I felt her take a deep breath then I saw her eyes close and she relaxed into my arms and moments later she was moving right along with me like we were one. She could move, she just needed the encouragement. I kissed the top of her head like I'd done to her and my mom a million times before but I froze for a moment when I felt her fingers start to play with the curls on the nape of my neck. Here it comes, my traitorous body was never going to let that just slide by.**

…**...**

**_NORA_**

**_I sighed softly after letting the tension out of my body that had accumulated while trying to keep up with the fast beat that the band had been playing all night. I really wasn't a dancer. I had been here a handful of times with Scott to either listen to him or listen to another band he wanted to check out, but we rarely danced. Patch, however, could dance. There really wasn't much he couldn't do. He moved with style and _****_grace like he'd been dancing for centuries. _**

**_I felt him pull me a fraction closer to him unconsciously and somehow at that moment my hands had unlocked and my fingers had found their way into his hair. I could have swore I heard him groan and felt a shiver run through him before I felt him freeze. I was trying to think fast for something to say when I felt a hand on my shoulder._**

"**_Mind if I steal MY girlfriend from you?" I saw Scott glaring at Patch. Scott was taller than Patch right now but I wasn't convinced Patch was done growing and in a fight, well, that's not one fight I'd want to witness. I'd never liked seeing Patch fight. I knew he'd win it wasn't that it was that I was always afraid he'd still be hurt. I never wanted to see Patch hurt. Shouldn't I be worried about Scott though too? I mean he IS my boyfriend and it was a pretty safe guarantee that Patch would win soooo..._**

"**_Sure. I saw a blonde over there eye fucking me anyways." Patch smiled tightly in a way that didn't reach his cold eyes he hadn't taken off of Scott. A shot of jealousy ran through me and I instantly dumped ice water on it. Patch was free to do what he wanted with whoever he wanted. I was his friend and nothing more. Somehow that didn't help, I felt sick the instant the words nothing more crossed my mind._**

"**_I need a drink." I grabbed Scott's arm and quickly started tugging him away from Patch towards the bar._**

"**_Fine. I could use one before I have to be back up on stage and by the looks of you two you could use cooled down." He said frostily._**

"**_Give it a break, Scott, take a chill pill, whatever. We _****_were just dancing." I wasn't in the mood for his jealousy, I had my own to deal with._**

"**_By the way you were holding each other I'd say _**_you_**_ need the chill pill." He bit back. _****_Were we really going to do this here and now on New Years Eve in a packed club?_**

"**_I didn't do anything wrong so back off. Patch is my friend, Scott, friend. Do you know what that word means? It means nothing more nothing less." There it was again. That knife in my stomach as the dreams I'd been having crept into my head. Nothing more._**

"**_You were seconds from his hand creeping up under your shirt. The other one was almost grabbing your ass . I suppose you were too busy rubbing on him and playing with his hair to notice." Scott's eyes blazed with his accusations._**

"**_For your information I wasn't rubbing up on anyone and Patch would never cross that line unlike you!" We were almost to the bar and I just wanted a drink and to collect my wit. _**

"**_I have a right to cross that line! Fuck, Nora! We've been going out since we were twelve and I'm almost sixteen! I think I've waited long enough." _**

**_We'd finally reached the bar and not meaning to I snapped my order to the bartender who didn't deserve my rude treatment and whipped around to face Scott._**

"**_Pity you're so old, that you've had to wait so_****_ooo_****_long. I'm so so soooo sorry that I'm not ready and you are. Please allow me to set what I want aside to make _**_you_**_ happy." I snapped._**

"**_You've never cared about making me happy! Patch just got more action out of you then I do! _****_Hell, he's been getting more action than me for years now!_****_"_**

"**_Take that back! Take it back right now, Scott! Our whole relationship has been about you. Your sports teams, your band, your mom, your sports car, me tutoring you...you you you you. So take it back! _****_You sound jealous of Patch and we're FRIENDS, Scott, FRIENDS!_****_" _****_People were starting to stare our voices had escalated so loud._**

"**_I won't take it back. You claim to be 'just friends, I bet there's more to it then that. I bet that it's him that get's you off and that's why you don't want me to touch you! _****_You're just wishing I was him! Wake up Nora, your best friend is a male whore he'll fuck you then chuck you like he does every other whore!"_**

**_That was it. Regardless if it was true or not about Patch getting around, it was none of his damn business and the part where he implied I was just another whore to Patch...that crossed the line and the glass of cherry coke the bartender had just set down made a quick trip straight into Scott's angry face._**

"**_There's your drink AND my cherry. Consider yourself dumped." I stormed away towards the bathroom feeling more nauseous by the moment. I made it to the hall when a pair of hands spun me around and trapped me against the wall. Patch. He had let go of me and was now braced with one hand on each side of me on the wall so that I was caged in by his body. _****_My breath hitched at his nearness. Why was his body suddenly having such an impact on me? People were walking to and from the bathroom bumping into him knocking him into me before some big dude stopped behind him and staggered backwards while talking, pressing Patch flush with my body. Patch's lips were moving but I couldn't think my body had froze along with my mind. What was he saying?_**

"**_What?" I mumbled._**

"**_I said he got lucky I didn't turn around and punch him for that." _**

**_I glanced at the retreating back of the big biker dude. That was questionable, that guy probably had liquid courage flowing through him._**

"**_You mean you got lucky." I surmised._**

"**_No, I'm about to _**_get _**_lucky." He whispered in my ear tickling it and for a second I thought he meant with me and my mouth fell open. Then I heard him laugh and saw him nod his head towards the blonde he had been telling _****_Scott about. Anger flared in me. I had just had a fight with Scott, broken up even and he was going to _**_leave _**_me?! After I had defended him and he had promised me!_**

"**_You're just going to leave me here to screw some girl you don't even know?!" His eyes flashed and his face showed some kind of reaction before he smoothed it back into his perfect mask. Damn him. _**

"**_I would never leave you Angel." He ran his finger down my cheek. _**

"**_Hey!" The blonde bimbo tapped on Patch's shoulder impatiently._**

"**_I'll be right back. I promise." He glanced between me and the blonde who was tapping her foot impatiently._**

"**_Fine. I have to pee." I knocked his arm out of the way in my haste to escape before the tears and sobs took over my body. Just before ducking into the safety of the bathroom I saw the look of confusion on Patch's face. Friends. We were just friends. I had no right to be crying or upset about him having sex, but _****_honestly _****_I just wanted it to be...No, that sounded too much like more than friends AND _****_more than sex and no way was I going close to the 'L' word when it followed the word 'in' before my best friends name. I was failing at drawing the line at lust I wasn't going to take the next step now or ever. That could ruin everything and I needed Patch in ways I'd never need anybody else._**

**_With my back against the locked bathroom door I slid down to the ground and broke sobs _****_just in time to hear the countdown. 10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1 HAPPY NEW YEAR! Everyone was cheering. Scott was ringing in his New Year on stage with his bass, the real love of his life, Vee had been wrapped around Rixon's body before dragging him away to what I presumed would be some dark corner or her purple neon while Patch and I had been dancing and Patch...well he was starting his new year off with a bang. Literally. Here I was crumpled on the floor of a filthy bathroom bringing in my New Year in tears completely alone._**


	7. Chapter 7- New Years Day

…**_..._**

**CHAPTER 7**

**NEW YEARS DAY**

_**PATCH**_

**I was startled by Nora's sudden departure, she'd moved away so fast she'd knocked my hand clean of the wall to get away and I could have swore I saw tears on her face. Why would she be crying though? Before I could contemplate that farther the blonde who's name I couldn't remember was tugging me into a back room that stored extra sound equipment. My head wasn't really in the game and she must have sensed that because she pushed me down on something I couldn't really see enough in the dim light to tell what it was, maybe a sub or a smaller speaker I thought absently? She was all hands running them through my hair down my neck and arms up my chest as she removed my shirt. I tried to focus, she was straddling my lap as she stripped off the fabric that was between us. I heard her moan at the sight of my chest. Normally I would have flipped her around, removed her short skirt and plunged into her without warning to make her scream. There was enough noise with a crowd this large to hide any sounds we could make. The problem was I couldn't get Nora out of my head. Not her body this time but the look on her face before the door closed. This was New Years Eve time to cut loose and have fun and I could tell she wasn't. **

**The blondes hands were now unbuckling my belt and undoing my jeans. Reaching in to grab me she made a sound of surprise that I wasn't already hard for her. That didn't stop her though she started squeezing and stroking me up and down trying to get the response she wanted but I couldn't, not when my friend was in need. Something was wrong, I sensed it.**

"**Excuse me." I knocked the girls hand off of me and quickly stood and fixed my clothes up.**

"**Hey! Where are you going? I thought I was going to get some action!" She half whined, half whimpered and part growled in frustration.**

"**Call me." I muttered already halfway out the door.**

"**I don't even know your name." She cried.**

"**Patch." Just as the door shut I heard her say. "But I don't even have your number." **

"**I know." I shouted back at her before adding a thank God in my head.**

**The countdown had just begun...10...9...8...I weaved my way swiftly down the hall breezing past people in a rush to make it to Nora before the strike of midnight. 7...6...5...4... I could see the door but just before I reached it some drunk guy took a swing at another and I was shoved back. 3...2...I shoved the guy out of my way and just as the crowd screamed 1 I reached the door and knocked. To begin with I didn't hear anything and I thought maybe I was too late and she had already left the bathroom and gone back to Scott. Then I heard a sniffled "Just a minute." She was crying. I felt horrible, what kind of friend was I to not have noticed she was upset, or was it me that upset her? I tried to think back to those last few minutes I had her pinned against the wall before her mad dash. Come to think of it she had looked upset but only for a minute then it looked like she had collected herself before things went bad again and she made her escape. What had I said? All of this shot through my mind in a matter of seconds and the determination to make whatever it was right set in.**

"**Nora. It's just me open up."**

"**Go away." She's never told me to go away. What the hell.**

"**I'm not going away. Unlock the door, please, so I can talk to you."**

"**Go away!"**

"**You know I'm not going to do that. If I have to I'll pick the lock." She knew I could do it, let's just say I went through a phase that let's just say could have left me with a lengthy police record.**

"**Can't a girl use the bathroom in peace!"**

"**You're not using the bathroom, Nora, you're crying I can hear you. Now open up before I.." I heard a soft click as she unlocked the door moving just a fraction to let me squeeze through.**

**What I saw broke my heart. She was leaning partially on the door and partially on the wall with her knee's tucked tightly against her chest, her arms wrapped snug around them and her head was resting on her knee's. Her long curls were shielding her face and her shoulders were shaking softly in silent tears. Had I done this?**

**I sat down beside her on the dirty floor and pulled her into my arms tucking her against my chest. Holding her as she cried was nothing new. We'd been practicing this routine for so long it was instinct. Every time her dad raised a fist at her or a hand she would climb through my window and I would fix her up and hold her as she cried. I nicknamed her dad 'the black hand' because his hand left black and blue bruises on her so often growing up that she stayed more nights at my house then hers. Either my parents still didn't know or they just hadn't said anything. They knew that Nora and I were only friends and we could be trusted to keep things innocent. My mind quickly flickered on the word innocent since as of late my thoughts had been anything but innocent. Sighing I brushed her hair back off her face stroking the tears off as I tilted her head up to look at me. Her eyes were red from crying and threatening to spill over again.**

"**Care to explain to me what I did to cause the waterworks so I can start making it up to you?" **

"**It's not really you that caused them." She averted her eyes which didn't go unnoticed by me.**

"**What do you mean 'not really'?" I thought these things were fairly simple, either I caused her tears or I didn't. Apparently I was too black and white in my male logic. Trying to get more information I questioned her more. "Did I do something or say something that upset you?"**

"**I was upset before you grabbed me in the hall." She drew in a shaky breath.**

**How could I not have noticed that? Oh yeah, I was too busy thinking about getting laid to get her off my mind to pay attention to what was in front of me. This is why lust and friendship don't mix, she'd needed me and I was too concerned about getting my dick wet to pick it up. I wanted to slam my head into the wall. Nothing I could do to change it now, the past was in the past so I just had to move forward and be the friend she needed me to be. **

"**I'm sorry I didn't notice, that was wrong of me. What happened to make you upset? Did Scott break up with you?" I don't know why that slipped out it just kind of did. Why else would she be ringing in the New Year on the filthy bathroom floor when he was out there having a good time. I knew he was because I saw him on my way back to the restroom.**

"**No, he didn't break up with me. I..I...I" She stammered and tears started to spill over again. **

"**It's okay, shh, I got you." I held her to me again, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "You what? What did you do? Did he hurt you? If he hurt you I will..." She cut me off.**

"**No, he didn't hurt me. I broke up with him." Her sobs took over and for a moment I was stunned into stillness. ****_She _****had broke up with ****_him_****? That didn't make any sense. Nora loved Scott. She'd been planning their wedding since grade school. **

"**What do you mean you broke up with him?" I was still reeling, elated, but reeling.**

"**You know, that thing where you tell someone it's over right before you throw a drink in their face." She gave a humorless laugh.**

"**You threw a drink in his face? I'm sorry I missed that." She giggled a little at that when I chuckled. My voice turned serious though, this was little Nora who as stubborn and defiant as she could be just didn't have a harmful bone in her body. He must have done something pretty bad to get her to react like that.**

"**Why did you throw your drink in his face?" She didn't answer me so I tried tilting her head up again to look at me, she wouldn't. "Nora, look at me, please?" She shook her head.**

"**Nora, look at me." I tried tilting her head up again, at first she shook her head and refused, finally she met my eyes. "Why did you throw your drink in his face?"**

"**I was mad."**

"**Obviously." I smirked. "What were you mad about? Did he do something?" Maybe she had caught him with another girl?**

"**No, it was something that he said." She looked away from my eyes and something clicked. It was 'not really' me...They had been fighting about me. **

"**It was about me." It was a statement not a question. I had already figured it out I didn't need confirmation.**

"**Kinda." She really was being evasive, it must have been pretty bad if she was trying not to tell me. I couldn't imagine anything he could say about me that she couldn't just say. It wasn't like I cared what he thought of me.**

"**Explain, please."**

"**He said..he said that.." She stammered. "He said that you're a male whore."**

**I laughed. "That's it? I am a male whore. So that's why you threw your drink at him? That was a waste of a good diet coke."**

"**There's more." She started fidgeting.**

**I stopped laughing. "How much more? What else did he say?"**

"**He said if he hadn't come up to us when he did that.." She stopped and turning away quickly brushed her fresh tears away.**

"**That what?" My voice sounded cold even to me. Her next words came out in a rush like if she didn't say them fast she wouldn't get them out, it took me a couple seconds to register what she'd said.**

"**He said you were seconds away from putting your hands up my shirt and on my ass and that Iwasjustanotheroneofyourwhore's." I wanted to kill him. I would rip him to shreds, break every bone in his body slowly and then do it again. Nora would never be just another girl, she would never be a whore. It wasn't even in her to be one and this is why things had to stay the way they were between us because that's what people would think and I couldn't lose her over rumors and insecurities. Besides, what I was feeling ****_was _****lust, not love. I loved Nora like a friend, like a sister...okay, maybe not a sister right now since I'd never fantasize about my sister but there was no way I was ****_in_**** love with her.**

"**You are not like the girls I've been with nor will you ever be. You have self respect, dignity, morals and values. You want love and marriage, even kids. You're not one of those girls that just gives it away and I'm not the kind of guy that would take that from you just to get temporary satisfaction. What you and I have is worth far more than sex to me and he's lying to you. I would never put my hands on you like that. You're a good girl, Nora. I'm bad but you're not." I saw her eyes shift to watch my mouth while I spoke.**

"**What if I don't want to be a 'good' girl?" She said barely audible.**

"**You are. Trust me." Why was she looking at my mouth like that like she...****_Oh god she just ran her tongue over her bottom lip and now she's biting it...look away Patch, look away. Think about something else._**

"**Maybe I could be naughty." She was trying to kill me. Naughty? I gave an internal groan. I didn't need her trying to be naughty when I was doing a perfectly fine job of making her just that myself. No, she was plenty temptation as is.**

"**Naughty? Nora you're in jeans and a shirt, not exactly naughty girl attire." I teased her hoping to get her mind off this conversation before my thoughts took on a collision course of what her being naughty might entail that it hadn't already. Her head jerked up and she leveled her eyes with mine penetrating them with a look of storm clouds. **

"**Are you telling me I can't be nau..." Her eyes were narrowed, I knew she was about to spit fire when somebody knocked on the door.**

**Phew. Saved by the door. "Just a minute." I stood and offered her my hand to help her up which she accepted, but ungraciously. As I turned to unlock the door I heard her speak.**

"**Don't think for a second this conversation is done." **

"**Great. Looking forward to it." Not.**

…**...**

_**NORA**_

_**I couldn't help the way my eyes were drawn to Patch's mouth, the way his bottom lip was so full like it was begging to be kissed. I knew I must look like a wreck from all the crying. Here I was dirty from sitting on the disgusting floor littered in paper towels, toilet paper and God knows what else in the Devil's Handbag bathroom with my eyes all swollen and red from the tears I'd shed that had probably left tears stains down my face, I was sure I was flushed and I was turned on. I knew he wouldn't return my feelings but I couldn't help but fantasize just a little while he spoke. What would those lips feel like? What would he taste like? Would they be soft or firm? Gentle or rough? And then he'd gone and said I couldn't be naughty. Why couldn't I? Sure, I didn't have the experience he had, Scott and I hadn't gone much farther than his hands up my shirt playing with my breasts through my bra. It wasn't for a lack of him trying, I just hadn't been ready. I thought we'd get married, settle down, raise a family, but since my birthday things had been steadily changing. It wasn't just getting back at Marcie or dressing different. It wasn't only having normal everyday fun I wanted, it was passion, romance, adventure, danger, adrenaline, doing things I wouldn't have done before. What Patch had said may have been true before but now that I had turned a new leaf and had broken up with Scott I wanted to change and break out of who I had been even more. I hadn't thought about all of this when I decided I wanted to work on myself, now though, now I had a taste of what that felt like and why Patch was so drawn to the bad boy side of life. I was no longer the girl that wanted to settle down, I had left her behind. I hadn't slept with Scott because it hadn't felt right with him, thinking about it I never craved his touch, he was more security. Another reason for it was that I really didn't know all I felt I should know about sex. Things that you can't ask your sex ed teacher without humiliation. It had felt so good throwing my drink in Scott's face for what he'd said, like a rush and I couldn't help craving that kind of rush again. Would sex be that kind of rush? I wanted to ask Patch but somebody knocked on the door halting any questions before I could ask. I had told Patch on his way out the conversation wasn't over and it wasn't. If he didn't think I could be naughty then we'd just see about that. There was nothing I didn't like more than proving him or anyone else wrong. When push came to shove I would push back every time.**_

_**I was so beat by the time I got home that I quickly washed my face, crawled into a T-shirt I had 'forgotten' to give back to Patch once I borrowed it several years ago and slid into bed. The fabric on it was worn to the point of being soft and the black had faded to a softer shade like the color of his eyes as he comforted me. They would lose their sharp obsidian edge when he was being soft and gentle. A side of him no one saw besides me. I snuggled deeper down into my covers tucking my thick fluffy comforter up under my chin like Patch does when I stay at his house. Once I was comfortable my mind started replaying the nights events. When I got to the part right before we were interrupted I couldn't help but hit repeat on the way his mouth had looked, it really was just begging to be kissed. It had been a long night indeed and even though I knew with every fiber of my being it was wrong I couldn't help but allow myself one last fantasy about what those lips and that guy could do. Closing my eyes tight I beckoned back the only other dream I'd had of Patch, the one in the meadow. In an instant my mind had recreated it, I'm laying on the blanket with Patch hovered above me pressing down just enough so that I'm physically aware he's on top of me, he smiles up at me with a mischievous grin and goes back to raising my shirt off of me before laying me back down. He doesn't let my back fall all the way down until he's unfastened my bra with his one hand. As soon as I feel the clasp let go my breath catches. He's seen me in a bathing suit but never topless. Not even Scott had seen me and here I was about to be fully exposed in bright daylight. I closed my eyes, trying to fight back the swarm of butterflies that had been released to reek havoc in my stomach when I felt the breeze of cool air on my now revealed skin making me gasp.**_

_**I felt his lips place gentle kisses on the top of each breast and then each nipple. The combination of the summer breeze, his breath and his lips causing a shiver to run through me and my nipples to harden.**_

"_**Nora, open your eyes." He whispers. Slowly I open my eyes meeting his for the first time since he saw me bare. **_

"_**You're beautiful. Don't hide from me. There's no reason to be shy." His voice is soft and seductive making me blush ten shades of red. "I love that color on you. I wonder what else I can do to make you blush." **_

_**Suddenly he was sucking my nipple into his warm mouth twirling his tongue around it as he sucked making a moan in his throat that turned the heat in my veins to fire causing me to arch up into him. He pulled back and switched to my other breast replacing his mouth with his hand so that both were receiving equal attention. My hands sought out his hair, tangling in the silky locks and tugging gently as he sucked on one side and lightly pinched and rolled the other making me whimper. **_

_**I was so wrapped up in my fantasy that I didn't even realize that my hand was imitating the movement I was experiencing in my head. **_

_**Needing more I raised my hips up trying to bring relief to the ache he was creating in the most intimate place. I didn't know what I wanted exactly or what I needed, I just knew it was something more than this.**_

_**He let my nipple slip out of his mouth and started placing light kisses all over my flat stomach and ribs heading further and further south towards the waist band. **_

_**My hand had a mind of it's own and as my fantasy heated up it trailed behind his lips ghosting over every inch of skin he covered before passing him and making it to the valley between my thighs. **_

_**I had never masturbated before but I was too far gone to think about it being embarrassing. Honestly, most people do it anyways I just hadn't ever needed to. It was like my hormones hadn't really been woken until now. My hand dipped under my panties touching the sensitive skin my Brazilian wax left bare. Just because I didn't have sex or rampant hormones didn't mean I was immune to looking good down there just in case. I liked the look and fleetingly wondered if Patch would.**_

_**I ran my fingers one on each side of my lower lips teasing myself before running a finger up my swollen and slicken folds. "Ahhhh..." I moaned at the feeling of being touched there. Behind my eyes it was Patches talented fingers that had slipped below to explore my hidden treasure. Just as his/my fingers reached my engorged bundle of nerves I heard my window slide open somewhere in the back of my head. **_

"_**Nora?" I heard Patch whisper my name. **_

_**Oh My God! He had almost walked in on me getting myself off on him! I thought about pretending I was asleep and couldn't hear him but that would never work since he knew I was a light sleeper and always woke up when he spoke. Dammit! I was squirming under the covers still turned on by my fantasy.**_

"_**Nora, I know you're awake, I can see you moving." Damn, damn, damn...**_

"_**I was having a bad dream (Ya right! The only thing bad was you interrupting it!). What are you doing here?" He had come over before a few times in the middle of the night to check on me when he sensed that something was wrong, but Marcie had a habit of sneaking in my room even after I had installed a lock she found a way to pick it. Last summer she filled my night stand drawer full of condoms and then told our dad that she'd 'accidentally' found something he should know about in my room. My 'dad' had screamed at me about being a little slut and slapped me full force across my face making my nose gush with blood, that hadn't stopped him he hit me again then took the two by four he kept in the hall closet for when I was in big trouble and beat my ass until it was black and blue along with the tops of my thighs. Tears had stung my eyes the few times I couldn't avoid sitting the next couple weeks. Surprisingly, she never came in on the nights he was here or even mentioned hearing our hushed voices which she would use to blackmail me without hesitation.**_

"_**I wanted to see how you were doing." I felt rather than saw him move across my room till he was next to my bed talking. **_

"_**I'm fine. Thank-you for checking on me." I wasn't feeling exactly hospitable since I was mentally beating myself over the head for what I had been doing when he crept through my window but the concern in his voice softened me up.**_

"_**Do you have room for one more?" Great. I can't say no without raising suspicion and if I say yes, well, I'm in his T-shirt and I'm still fighting my hormone high. Sighing I pull the covers up just enough and scoot over for him to crawl in. We've been doing this so long it seems perfectly natural. Nothing had been different for us compared to any other best friends, being a male and female had been of no consequence...**_

"_**Cute pj's. You're shirt is the perfect match for one I use to have. It was my favorite shirt, to bad it went missing a couple years ago or we could have worn them on twin day." He smirked knowingly at me.**_

"_**I don't know what your talking about." I feigned innocence.**_

"_**Of course you don't. You'd never take anything from me like that shirt or my favorite sweatshirt or jersey or baseball cap or..."**_

"_**Alright! Alright I get your point. So what ya going to do about it?" I challenged him, my eyes showing my amusement I'm sure.**_

"_**You'll know when I do it." Patch flashed a downright dangerous and evil smile before pulling me into him. As normal as this felt, as safe as it felt, as good as it felt I couldn't stop the feeling in the pit of my stomach that this wasn't a good idea, not tonight, not now that I was so turned on and definitely not when he was the reason...**_

...

**NEXT CHAPTER...WHEN FANTASIES BECOME DREAMS...PATCH AND NORA SMUT AHEAD-Things are about to get uncomfortable, maybe even a little...awkward. I'm zoning in on a major turning point for these two, things can't be too easy for them. The teen years are fraught with hormones, lust, confusion, first love's and sometimes tragedy. Patch and Nora will have their lives changed very very soon and it will test their friendship in several ways. I'm just tying together some loose ends so please bare with me.**


	8. Chapter 8- WHEN FANTASIES BECOME DREAMS

**CHAPTER 8**

_**WHEN FANTASIES BECOME DREAMS**_

_**PATCH**_

**I pulled Nora into my arms instantly feeling better knowing that the storm of emotions she had felt had, for the most part, past. I closed my eyes and before I knew it I was asleep. In my dream I was back at the club in the storage room only this time instead of the blonde it was Nora there with me. I was talking until I noticed she was staring at my mouth like she wanted to kiss me. My experience assured me that's what she wanted when I licked my bottom lip tantalizingly slow and she mimicked it. Suddenly the air around us sparked, both of us taking in only shallow breaths. After a beat she spoke.**

"**Patch?" Her voice coming out barely above a whisper.**

"**Yeah?" **

"**Kiss me."**

"**Kiss you?" I asked in a hushed tone. I had to be sure I heard her right.**

"**Please." In that instant everything was forgotten and my lips captured hers. Silk on silk, fire on fire. It was smooth it was passionate it was electric, raw, and somehow tender. She whimpered into my mouth. A groan escaped my throat as she brushed her satiny tongue against my bottom lip begging permission to enter which I readily gave. Our tongues met in a heated dance sliding along each other while seeking every curve, corner and crevice of each others mouths. Her fingers find their way into my hair tugging gently while she grips my shirt like she's afraid I'm going to disappear. My fingers stray up under her shirt, ghosting along her ribs and stomach exploring her soft skin before I take the weight of her firm breasts that fit perfectly in my hands. As soon as my thumb brushes against her hardening nipples we moan in unison and she arches into my hands more.**

"**Do you like that?" I asked.**

"**Yes." She gasps, arching into my touch again.**

**I smirk and continue exploring her skin, one hand rolling and pinching her already hardened nipples as the other continues exploring the expanse of skin under her shirt.**

"**Take it off." I oblige and remove her shirt and she immediately captures me in another heated kiss getting my already erect cock even harder. **

"**Better?" I ask her huskily.**

"**No..." She half cry's and half moans.**

"**No?" I'm confused for a second before I feel her tugging on my shirt. Ah, I understand and a smile creeps across my face. **

"**Off." She whimpered. I comply readily, quickly shirking out of my shirt. It doesn't even have time to hit the floor and she has her fingers in my belt loops yanking me back into her. **

**I can feel her succulent globes pressed against my skin. Her pointed peaks poking through her sexy lace bra and rubbing the bare skin of my chest in the a way that makes me groan. I grab a fist full of her hair and pull back enough to show a little dominance and angle her so that I can kiss her more deeply. She responds with fire thrusting her hips forward into mine. I trail my hands down her back to cup her perfect little ass and she takes that opportunity to wrap her legs around my hips and lock her ankles behind me pulling me into her again. I growl at the sudden sensation of her hot core against my throbbing cock and I grind up into her...hard, letting her feel everything I have to offer her. My eyes roll back and close for a moment taking in and absorbing every feeling of my body against hers. Somewhere in my lust induced haze my brain triggers a warning... This is starting to feel all too real. I'm lost somewhere between deep sleep and waking up when I hear a soft moan and a shiver against me that takes me right out of the in between phase into Oh Shit phase in a flash. Reality slams into me at the same time that my hips shift automatically into Nora's firm ass and she's pushing back! She's the one making those sounds and...oh god...my hips thrust one more time and we both fall apart. ****_SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT! That didn't just happen. Please tell me that didn't just happen, that I'm still asleep. No, I know I'm wide awake. Great! What the fuck now Patch, think think think. Okay, she doesn't know you're awake or that you know she just came and let's just hope she's asleep or at least not aware that you just came. _****I suck in a deep breath to calm myself when I realize that my hand is still up her shirt and stroking her still heaving chest. ****_Fuck my life._**

…**_..._**

* * *

**_NORA_**

_**I closed my eyes and tried to settle the butterflies that were once again flying thrashing around in my stomach. This was Patch, I could trust him to be at my side through anything and to never hurt me. It's just this strange hormones suddenly doing this. Maybe it's part of the make-over, the new me coming out of my shell. I should talk to Vee, she knows a lot about boys and this stuff, I just have to skip over the Patch part. I yawned and before I knew what happened I was sound asleep.**_

_**Patch's lips were on mine and I was kissing him with a passion and energy I'd never felt before. Patch wasn't hesitant about responding. He wrapped his hands around my waist pulling me hard against him like he was trying to pull me inside. I devoured his lips like they were my oasis in the middle of the desert. I relished in the feeling of his lips on mine, the taste of his tongue and mouth as we explored each other relentlessly and the firm muscles of his body wrapped around me holding me flush against his body.**_

_**Patch deepened our kiss, pushing me back against the smooth concrete building behind me, our hands roaming all over each others bodies, he was searching and discovering all of my curves and I was learning every dip and valley of his chiseled torso. I felt like I was starving and he was the last morsel of food. His lips lift my mouth leaving a trail down my throat, across my collar-bone, over the tops of my breasts. I followed suit, kissing down his neck, nibbling on his pulse point making him growl before continuing on my journey south. Everywhere our bodies touched we set each other on fire. I could feel the lava start to pour and pool between the valley of my thighs. There were no thoughts just physical sensation running through me.**_

_**My fingers raked through Patches black hair, pulling and tugging on the raven locks, grasping his shirt I pulled his body closer. Patch's hands continued to study my body like a blind man reading, he cupped my breasts making me moan softly. When had my breasts become so sensitive? He grabbed my hips trying to pull me closer again but there was no room left between us already. His hands traveled lower to my ass curving around them he lifted me enough to grind his rock solid erection against my melting core. I gave a small gasp and cry of approval.**_

_**Savoring the feel of Patch's arousal against me fueled my need. Not that it needed any more fuel. I brushed my fingers up and under Patches shirt, exploring his defined abs, feeling his well muscled chest, discovering the sounds and noises he would make when I found his most sensitive spots.**_

_**I hooked my leg around his and he got the hint giving me a small lift so I could lock my ankles around his waist. Now he was pressing squarely on my center where an inferno was roaring. I rolled my hips against him thrusting into his hard on and reveling in the primal sound he made and the feel of him rocking his hips into mine in answer of my need. Friction. That's what I needed. That felt so good I did it again and again, each of my hip rolls met with his thrust until I was panting. Our kisses became desperate and searing biting each others lower lip, sucking on each others tongues as we moved against each other. The coil in my body, the heat in my stomach burned like the surface of the sun and I was about to burst. I was so close, so close.**_

"_**Patch." I whispered between kisses and pulls of air.**_

"_**Me too." His voice was gravely and raw with want.**_

"_**Oh God." I moaned arching into him. He picked up his speed and angled my hips so he was rubbing my clit through my jeans on each stroke of our bodies against each other. Just a little more and I was going to come apart. Another thrust and his mouth found my nipples as he pulled the cups of my demi bra down, sucking one in and rolling, pinching and tugging the other my feet feel off the ledge I'd been teetering on and I came. Hard. I ground myself shamelessly against him riding out my orgasm as I heard him find his release. As the waves of my high started receding I became dimly aware that I was not against a wall, in fact, I was in my bed indeed grinding back into my best friends hips behind me who was trembling from my movements. Fuck. I had not only been dreaming, I'd been acting out every single freaking motion. I was mortified. Did he notice? Was he awake? God this was going to be awkward if he was. I tried to focus on his breathing, was his chest moving like it does when he's asleep or awake? It was difficult to concentrate with the results of the flood between my legs and the feel of him pulsing...wait...pulsing?!... behind me and his hands are stroking my breasts... **_

* * *

_***THIS WAS A SHORT IN BETWEEN CHAPTER, HOPE YOU DON'T MIND TOO MUCH I WANTED TO KEEP SOME TENSION BETWEEN THEM AND GIVE NORA A LITTLE MORE SOMETHING SOMETHING... REVIEWS HELP ME KNOW WHAT YOU LIKE, DON'T LIKE, AND WHAT I CAN IMPROVE ON AND THEY ONLY TAKE A COUPLE MINUTES SO PLZ LEAVE FEEDBACK :) THANKS TO THOSE FOLLOWING, HOPE YOU'RE ENJOYING THIS AND THAT I'M DOING THESE CHARACTERS JUSTICE.**_

_**AS ALWAYS ALL CHARACTERS BELONG TO THE TALENTED BECCA FITZPATRICK 3**_


	9. Chapter 9- NOW WHAT

**HERE IS MY NEW UPDATE, SORRY IT HAS TAKEN ME SO LONG. I AM FIGHTING PNEUMONIA AND GETTING READY TO MOVE SO THINGS HAVE BEEN A LITTLE HECTIC. AS YOU CAN TELL THIS CHAPTER IS TWICE AS LONG AS MY OTHERS SO I HOPE THAT MAKES UP FOR THE WAIT. I FULLY INTEND ON FINISHING THIS STORY. I'M LEAVING THIS WITH A CLIFF HANGER SO SORRY, I'M EVIL THAT WAY-LOL. I WAS GOING TO ADD WHAT'S IN STORE FOR YOU IN THE NEXT CHAPTER INTO THIS ONE, BUT THIS ONE IS ALREADY SO LENGTHY. I HOPE YOU ENJOY IT AND THANKS FOR THE FEEDBACK I'M GETTING, IT MAKES WRITING EVEN BETTER :) DON'T FORGET IT ONLY TAKES A MINUTE TO REVIEW!**

* * *

**CHAPTER 9**

_**NOW WHAT**_

_**PATCH**_

**I pulled my hand slowly back hoping she was still dreaming and hadn't noticed where it was or what had happened. Nora isn't exactly the sexual type, that's Vee. Nora is, well, innocent and a little naive. I'm the throw caution into the wind and to hell with the consequences, Vee is in between in her personality. Up until her birthday Nora lived through our experiences. Vee had her share of mischief and sexual experience with Rixon, but it had never crossed my mind that one day Nora would want that too. God, what if she had been dreaming about Scott while I was touching her? I groaned. Had they had sex? My anger started to rise. Wait, why do I even care? It's not like I'm her boyfriend and she cheated on me, hell I get around enough why can't she? That was true, but apparently my stomach didn't agree because I suddenly felt sick. She would have told me if they had, right? I was starting to get a headache from the thoughts swarming around in me. I needed a shower and I need to get out of here before she wakes up. I slowly and carefully inched away from her, trying not to wake her, I want to pretend this never happened and never talk about it. Talking would lead to lying, I wouldn't lie to Nora, I'd have to side-step it which always pisses her off and after her break up I don't think she needed another reason to be upset.**

**I stilled at the edge of the bed trying to make sure she was asleep. I couldn't tell, but she hadn't moved so that was a good sign, right? She also hadn't screamed and yelled or punched me. I crawled out her window and dashed back to my place before Marcie or her dad could spot me, relieved once I was back in the safety of my room.**

**As I scrubbed down in the shower letting the cool water run over me and erase the evidence of what had just happened off my body I wished I could erase it from my brain. I've known Nora my whole life, she is like a sister to me so how am I going to face her now that I had touched her? I felt like such a pervert, disgusted with myself, she'd been asleep completely unaware that I was basically molesting her. Yeah, I had been asleep when it started but I was awake when my body erupted in response to our hips meeting. I shook my head under the spray of the shower. I couldn't lose her, how could I act like nothing had ever happened? What if her and Scott hadn't touched like that and I'd just taken her first experience away from her? The thought of her with Scott sent a bolt of emotion through me way too similar to jealousy for my taste. I was a fool not thinking of how the fantasies I'd been having might affect me sleeping in her bed. I've cuddled with her countless times since hitting puberty and that's never happened. She's the only girl I would cuddle with, I'd never been with someone I wanted to stay with past us getting off. Nora was different, and that just made me feel a hundred times worse. This was all my fault. I slammed my fist into the wall letting the anger seep through. I needed to hit the gym and take some of guilt and hate out on a punching bag before I lost it on the next idiot who pissed me off. I finished my shower, got dressed and grabbed my gym bag before hollering good-bye to my parents and driving to the gym. Hopefully Nora didn't show up at my house and track me down.**

**I hadn't seen Nora since 'the incident' in her bed yesterday morning. What a way to start the New Year. I pulled into the parking lot at school and sat there for a few minutes collecting myself. Nora usually came over and got a ride with me, this morning she never showed up so I left. Maybe she stayed home, I perked up for a minute with that thought then realized that would mean she was really sick, the last thing she wanted was more time at home where her step-mom and her dad were in and out all day. Her step-mom was a really tall woman with a temper and a way of carrying herself that said "if you mess with me I will knock your ass into next week". When it came to Marcie and their dad though, she was all sweet as pie. I wasn't sure if it was his money or if she really loved him. She belonged to whatever club he was apart of and I got the impression they were leaders. I had bad bad feelings about what that club might be about, but I could care less what happened to them as long as it never affected Nora. I glanced up just in time to hear the bell ring and spot Nora walking through the doors into class.**

**Nora and I only shared two classes and they were in the afternoon. Normally we saw each other in the halls, today I hadn't seen her once. I was trying not to make a big deal of it, in a big way it was a relief, but it also caused me to feel a little sick to my stomach. Was she purposely avoiding me? I slammed my locker shut just as I felt a hand slap me on the back. The only person daring enough to do that was Rixon.**

"**Hey what's up?" I greeted him.**

"**Not much man. Did you you see Nora?" **

"**No, I was going to ask you that, why?" Rixon and I were like brothers, he knew all of my secrets and I knew all of his with one exception: Nora.**

"**I saw her in the hall a couple times, she didn't look so good, maybe she's sick. Just thought you should know. Catch up to you at lunch."**

"**Sounds good." I was immediately concerned. Nora was healthy, she took care of her body so she wasn't sick very often. I searched the halls for her quickly scanning the crowd for her reddish brown curly hair. I spotted her right before the bell rang.**

"**Nora!" I yelled, trying to get her attention, she looked back at me gave a split second wave and practically ran into her class. Hmm. Was she avoiding me? No, I know she was asleep. Before I could give it any more thought the bell rang and I had to run to make it to my class before the next bell rang.**

**I could hardly concentrate in my next two classes, when the class was dismissed for lunch I made my way down the hall to the lunch room, thankful for the way the other students ran to get out of my way, some out of fear others out of respect, it didn't matter to me as long as they moved. In just a few minutes I'd be able to clear things up with Nora. **

**Skipping the cafeteria line I headed for our table, before I made it half way there Nora saw me. Normally she greeted me with a big smile and a wave, today her face turned white and she yanked Vee's arm dragging her behind her out of the lunch room and out the door of the school. I tried to catch up but she had disappeared by the time I made it outside. A weight settled in my stomach. What if she knew? What if she hadn't been asleep like I'd thought? Here I'd been worried she was sick, maybe she was sickened by me? I slammed my hand into the wall causing the kids around me to give me curious stares. When I turned my eyes on them they quickly averted their gaze. Had I just lost my best friend?**

**Whatever happened I had to fix it. If she was awake when the 'incident' happened we needed to talk and sort this out. **

**I tried numerous times to catch her in the hall, to talk to her in the classes we shared that afternoon. She'd given me a weak smile, blushed and avoid me. I attempted to see her after school, I even went to her house but Marcie answered the door refusing to let me in unless I agreed to a date. That was NEVER going to happen. If I hadn't lost Nora already that would seal that deal with a promise. She'd never forgive me for that. **

**The afternoon turned into evening without a word from Nora, the evening turned into the next day and the next day turned into a week and a weight settled in my chest. How could I fix this if she wouldn't even speak to me? Was it really **that** bad? Okay, I admit it was a little more than...awkward. Still, to throw away all those years over that didn't seem fair, it wasn't like I planned it. Stupid, stupid me. If I hadn't insisted on sleeping next to her, if I'd just left after checking on her, if she hadn't been in only my t-shirt, if her body hadn't...**Fuck.** For the first time since puberty hit I cursed my body and my hormones. If I couldn't feel them then I wouldn't have this problem. This never would've happened. We would have remained as close as we were, finished school, went off to college together, she'd get married, have kids and I'd be uncle Patch. We'd still be best friends and I dare any guy try to come between us. Anger shot through my veins thinking about a guy trying to ruin our friendship, then the irony hit me, **I **was the guy who had done that. Me, and me alone.**

**The following week came and went as the fog continued to roll in shrouding me in darkness. When February arrived Rixon had had enough of me.**

"**What the hell is going on between you and Nora? You've been so depressed I feel like it's raining on me. What gives?"**

"**Nothing." I shoved the tray of food away from me. **

"**Obviously, she's been side-stepping you since New Years. We've been like brothers since I arrived in the sixth grade and there hasn't been a day I haven't seen the two of you together. You're practically attached at the hip. Did you nail her and call her by the wrong name?" He smirked at me. **

**My thoughts immediately took me back to my dream, to the feeling of her beneath my hand, moving with me and I swallowed hard and blanched for a split second before my mask slid carefully back into place. I was **not **discussing that with Rixon. **

"**You're not getting off that easy, I hit a nerve. You banged her didn't you and then what, she wasn't impressed with your minute man status?" His face was serious but his eyes were filled with humor. Humor at my expense.**

"**Listen here, Rixon." I growled. "If you ever talk about her like that again.." I was seething, my fist clenched as I glared at him and my jaw was clenched. He could tease me all he wanted with the minute man joke since we both knew that was untrue, but Nora, no fucking way. I could have punched him in the gut and drop kicked him without flinching.**

"**Geez take a chill, I was just joking with you, lighten up. Christ Patch, you act like you're her boyfriend sometimes instead of just her friend. Is that the problem? She wants to be more than friends and you don't?" His face was serious now.**

**I sighed. How could I explain this so I wasn't giving anything away and he would believe me? "No, it's nothing like that. It has to do with something that happened on New Years." That sounded vague enough, now I just hope he bought it.**

"**That's the night she broke up with Scott. Hey, did that have something to do with you?" Bingo! There was my out. That wasn't what was going on between us BUT she had broken up with Scott over me so if I say yes and he **assumes **that's what it is that isn't the same as flat out lying since I never admitted that was the issue at hand.**

"**Yeah, that's the night she broke up with him, he told her I was trying to use her for sex." Once again that flash of rage rolled off me at the thought of him even **suggesting** I would do that to Nora. **

"**You guys are like a married couple without the marriage." He smirked. "And no sex. Hell, you sure you aren't married?" He gave me a firm slap on the shoulder as we dumped our trays. "You'll work it out, you always do."**

**That's just it though, we've never had to work anything out. This was all new territory. Nora was the one who walked in our shadows, who was more introverted, the suffer in silence type. This new person she was becoming had stirred things up a lot. She had started settling old scores with Marcie, she was dressing different, she was talking more, or at least she was before she decided to quit speaking to me. I didn't know how she was doing now and that bothered me. She stood up for herself now too, that was new. She was becoming someone new, maybe she just didn't need me anymore.**

**With thoughts like that I'd soon be playing Russian roulette. I pinched the bridge of my nose trying to stop the headache that was forming before I had to sit through class staring at the back of the head of the person I missed spending time with. When either of us felt this way it was the other one who cheered us up. Sure I had Rixon, but we weren't the type of guys that got all mushy gushy. Damn, thinking about my conversation with him I realized I'd forgotten to ask him how she was, he should have a clue since he was with Vee, her next closest friend.**

**I took my seat and my heart almost stopped when I saw Nora turn and give me a shy little smile that lingered a little longer than anything I'd gotten from her in the past month. I smiled back instantly, it gave me a tiny bit of hope that maybe I didn't lose her. **

**Half way through class Nora was called to the principles office. That was odd, she'd never been called to the principles office before. What the hell did Marcie do now that she was going to get blamed for? There was no other explanation, Nora was a goody two shoes, she'd never be in trouble of her own volition. All I could think was, now what?**

**Every day that week Nora became a little more friendly, a little more relaxed looking around me. She still hadn't approached me, but I got the impression it wouldn't be long. That lifted the black cloud that had been hanging over me to gray. Part of the reason it was gray was that every day this week she was called to the Principals office and her car had been parked in the lot long after the others had left. I know because I still look out for her. That could only mean one thing. Detention. It didn't make sense though, Nora was an angel, that's why I called her Angel. As soon as she started talking I planned on finding out.**

...

**Today was Valentines Day. I wanted to chuck my pillow at my alarm clock and pretend I didn't hear it to avoid school. I hated Valentines Day. First of all it was a totally commercialized holiday. Second, if you love someone you should show them **every** day of the year, not just the day marked on the calender with a heart. Third, and possibly the biggest reason was the way girls went nuts on this day and flooded me and my locker and my desk with cards, notes, candy, stuffed animals, flowers... I even had girls hand me their thongs! They'd hang on me trying to push each other out of the way lining up to hopefully get a date with me. It was all so...pathetic. Girls generally hung on me, but on Valentines Day you would think I had a magnetic force or was some big Hollywood star. The fourth and final reason I dreaded this day is the one thing most kids look forward to; February 14th is my birthday. That's right, I was born on Valentines Day. My parents loved each other with a love that others should envy, a love that no one I had ever met in my short sixteen years could rival so it was sort of fitting that me, the only child they'd ever been able to conceive, was born on the day of love. Girls thought it was romantic and it gave them all the more excuse to shower me with unwanted gifts. The only person I wanted to spend the day with was Nora and for the first time in my life it didn't look like that would be happening. I glared at my alarm clock until I heard my mom and dad knock softly on my door.**

"**Patch? Are you awake?" My mom asked in an almost too quiet to hear voice. I had to smile, my parents were hardcore highly respected members of Coldwater Creek and at the top of their respective fields, but when it came to me, they were all hearts and flowers with a very rare occasional thorn. The thorn being when I got in trouble and they had to come down on me. **

"**I'm up you can come in." I sat up in bed, stretching. My mom came over first, already dressed in her hospital uniform scrubs, and gave me a kiss on my cheek and a lingering hug. I gave her a tight squeeze before letting her go. She really was a good mom and I was lucky to have her, lucky to have them both as my parents. I could have been born to someone bad like Nora's dad, Hank Miller. My dad came up and gave me a firm pat on the back before pulling me in for a manly one arm hug. **

"**Happy birthday, son." They said almost in unison.**

"**Thank-you." I smiled.**

**My dad cleared his throat. "It's your sixteenth birthday and we wanted to get you something special, something you would love. Your mother and I put a lot of thought into this and we hope that our gift is something you will love as much as we love you." I stopped him.**

"**That's impossible." I chuckled, what could I possibly love more than they loved me? It was crazy.**

**My mom gave me a sweet smile. "It's almost time for me to leave so without further a due here is the keys to your present, it's parked in the garage since you can't ride it until the ice melts." She handed me a key on a key ring with two feathers on it. **

"**No way! Is this..." I swallowed hard. I had been drooling over a black vintage Harley Davidson sportster motorcycle. My mom had carried on about the dangers of motorcycles, the accident victims that had come through the ER needing emergency surgery, they often didn't make it or barely survived. I hadn't seen this coming.**

"**Happy sweet sixteen, son. Let's go look at that bike, you have two more gift down there waiting for you." Sweet indeed. I followed them out into the garage. My breath caught a little in my throat and it wasn't just because of the motorcycle. Standing next to it holding a large gift wrapped box was Nora. **

"**I didn't expect to see you." I choked slightly on my words, my voice coming out a little rougher than I wanted. I hated showing emotions, but with Nora it just slipped out.**

"**I couldn't let my guardians birthday pass by without a hug and a gift." She smirked before walking towards me and giving me a one arm hug. That wasn't going to cut it, we hadn't talked in a month, I took the gift from her and sat it down before scooping her up and spinning her around. **

"**I missed you, Angel." I whispered in her ear as she giggled. "We need to talk. Alone." I told her before setting her down.**

"**Not today, it's your birthday." She answered quietly. "Now open your present from me!" Excitement lit her eyes.**

**I took the large box and carefully unwrapped it. After slicing through the tape holding it together I reached inside and pulled out one shiny black helmet. I raised my eyebrow at her knowingly, this wasn't exactly a present for me, it was a helmet for her. The real gift was that it was a clear messaged to me that she planned on spending time with me for the foreseeable future which was the best gift I could ask for. I knew Nora was terrified of motorcycles so that was another reason it held a special meaning...she trusted me with her life.**

"**Start it up hunny. See how it feels, I know you can drive it yet, but doesn't hurt to get the feel for her." My mom beamed.**

"**Him, mom, him. Not her." I mock glared at her. This bike had 'I'm a bad ass' written all over it, it was meant to be mine. I started 'him' up and he purred underneath of me like a sleek and powerful black panther. A little push of the throttle and the jungle cat roared with power.**

**When I went to pull the key out of the ignition I noticed the feathers that I had seen but not really noticed when my dad handed them to me. I ran my thumb over them. I looked up at my mom, she had tears in her eyes. "One for you and one for Nora, like the black mystery feather. I saw them and knew they were meant for you. We have one more gift for you." My mom handed me a long slim rectangle box wrapped delicately with black wrapping paper and a pearl colored satin ribbon. I looked at them curiously. **

"**Open it before we have to leave." My dad chuckled.**

**I untied the ribbon and when I lifted the lid I saw a silver chain with a pair of angel wings. I lifted it up holding the two wings up to the light to get a better look, one was clear and cast rainbows like a prism, the other was black glass, like the onces on the key ring, that let a fraction of light through when held up to it.**

"**One to symbolize Nora, your Angel, and the other to symbolize you, her fallen angel. Each of you are like an angel with one wing and every time you embrace each other with your love and friendship you both soar. Wear it as protection and as a reminder to guard after Nora, we are the only real family she has."**

"**Always. Thank-you, for everything." I clasped the chain around my neck.**

"**Mr. and Mrs. Cipriano, Vee invited me to go out tonight with her and Rixon and since it's Patch's birthday and a Friday do you think he could go with us, if he wants to?"**

"**What have we told you about calling us that? You're as much our daughter as Patch is our son. I don't mind if he goes, but be careful and home by a reasonable hour. Without company, Patch." My dad gave me a stern look that didn't quite reach his kind eyes.**

"**If you have plans already Patch, I'll understand." Nora said.**

"**Actually, I do." I was only teasing her but my heart gave a squeeze at the disappointed look on her face. "I have a hot date."**

"**Oh. Well, umm, okay. It'll be weird to not spend your birthday with you, enjoy your date." Nora's voice broke a little at the end. Maybe our separation was just as hard on her as on me.**

"**I will, I always do when I'm with my best friend." I gave her my most evil smile and winked. She punched me in my arm and even though I barely felt it I feigned injury making her and my parents laugh.**

"**Alright you two, it's time for you to get to school and us to work. One more thing, I wanted to remind you that your dad and I are going out tonight for a Valentines date of our own so we probably won't see you again until tomorrow. We love you hunny, have a good day and happy birthday." My parents each gave me another hug and a kiss on my cheek as they said good-bye to us.**

"**I love you, see you tomorrow. Have fun on your date and don't do anything I wouldn't do!" I called after them. I heard them laugh and my dad call out over his shoulder before shutting the door. "Then I guess we're free to do pretty much anything we want since rules don't apply to you." I knew he was teasing me, in spite of all the headache's I gave them, they loved me.**

…**...**

**_NORA_**

**I was sitting in Vee's room listening to her go through her expansive wardrobe for something to wear on her date with Rixon tonight to the Devils Handbag. I leaned up against the black scrolled wood headboard with the intricate floral carving and took in the room like I did each time I was here. There was something so comfortable, so...Vee about her room. It just fit her. Her sheets were a purple silk set off by a bright black and white zebra print comforter that was fluffy and soft. She had a generous amount of pillows in all sizes, shapes and shades of purple, black and zebra print to match. Three of her walls were in varying shades of medium to deep purple and the fourth wall was covered in smoke black large square mirrors tiles. She has little decorative wood shelves painted in black and hot pink hanging around her room on the walls holding collectibles that are usually Marilyn Monroe themed like the framed images of her curvy ideal. I love that Vee is a full figure girl and even though she often tries different diets, they never last long, as Vee explains the first three letters of them is die, she is actually quite happy and comfortable with her full curves, she exudes a confidence I'm still trying to achieve. The colors in her room are bold just like the girl who resides here and I wouldn't have her any other way. Next to Patch, she's the one I can turn to, the one I trust with almost all of my secrets. The only thing I keep from her is Patch. **

**Vee used to really like Patch, thought he was hot and he is, but somewhere along the line she lost her trust in him. She says he's going to break my heart, I don't know how that's possible when there's nothing more between us then friendship...except my fantasies and...that morning..._Push it out of your mind Nora, just don't think about it. He probably doesn't even know, and even if he did it's not worth losing your friendship over nothing more than overactive imaginations. _**

"**Hey, Vee, can I ask you something?" I adjusted the pillows behind my back. Vee takes forever to decide what to wear so I might as well get comfortable and what I'm about to ask her is probably going to get her talking. Then again, when does Vee ever _not_ talk?**

"**Go for it babe, I got nothing to hide." She flashed me a smile over her shoulder before turning back to continue perusing her closet.**

"**Umm...I...I..." I stammered trying to get my courage up and my words out.**

"**Spit it out, Nora, it's not like I'm going to make fun of you." I knew she wouldn't, but that didn't make it any easier.**

"**What's it like?" Okay, that was vague, but I'm still a chicken shit. I hate showing any signs of weakness no matter how insecure I'm feeling, but this was...well... SEX.**

"**What's what like? Could you be more specific?" She asked me.**

**I might as well spit it out, I'm going to have to tell her soon anyways. "Sex." There, I said it.**

**Vee burst out laughing and I shot her a warning look which halted her in her tracks. "I'm sorry babe, it's just that I didn't expect that coming from you."**

"**Why? Who else would I talk to about it? It's not like my mom's around and there's no way in hell I'm asking Marcie or my step-mom even though Marcie probably has a Master's degree in it by now."**

"**Maybe that's how she stay's so skinny. I read that you burn more canaries through sex than most other forms of exercise, makes you wonder why we have so many fitness clubs and so little sex clubs."**

"**VEE SKY! You are sick!" I laughed and threw a pillow at her, which she dodged. "And for your information I'm sure that America is full of more sex clubs then us in little 'ole Coldwater Creek are aware of."**

**When we were done laughing she said, "See? Right there, Nora you embarrass so easily and your not exactly the type."**

**I sobered up instantly at that, she was right about the embarrassed part, hell, I'd turned five shades of red just saying the word sex. This was the second time in two months that someone had implied that I was not capable of being sexy, at least that's what it felt like they were implying. I narrowed my eyes at her. "What makes you say that? You're supposed to be one of my best friends, some support you are."**

"**I AM supporting you, Nora. I'm not saying you couldn't or wouldn't have sex, I'm just saying you're not the wild type. Look, babe, the only guy you ever dated was Scott and I doubt you let him get very far. Hell, I bet you didn't even make it third base, maybe not even second with him. Am I right?" Well she did say **_with Scott_** so Patch didn't technically count...right? I decided to go with that even though I felt kind of guilty for not telling her. I hated keeping things from her.**

"**So what if Scott and I didn't fool around. I wanted my wedding night to be special." I defended myself. God, I sounded like a prude.**

"**Exactly my point. You aren't the spontaneous type, you sleep next to the hottest guy in school and don't even think about sex. There's nothing wrong with wanting to wait Nora, in fact I admire you." Ouch. That may have been true in the past, but not anymore. This conversation was headed in a dangerous direction, time to steer it back to my original question before she figures out that I'm not being completely forthright with her. She has an uncanny way of knowing what I'm thinking just like Patch. She's pretty much my 'untwin'.**

"**I can be bad and spontaneous! Just last month I printed up those fliers, then there was the blow horn under Marcie's chair that went off when she adjusted it _and_ I wrapped her new Toyota 4-runner in saran wrap! And don't forget..." She cut me off.**

"**My personal favorite, the condom wrappers you put in the boys locker rooms that had her name and phone number printed on them after she displayed your underwear with the word 'whore' on your locker. I don't know where or how you got those, but that was worth the month of detention you got." We laughed.**

"**You have to love the Internet." I grinned. "Seriously Vee, what's it like."**

**She sighed. "I think that depends on who your with and how much you care about each other. There's a difference between let say having sex, fucking, and making love. At our age it's usually the first two and almost never the last."**

"**What was your first time like? Was it with Rixon?" Vee had dated a couple other guys, none of them ended well for her.**

"**No it wasn't." She said quietly. **

"**You weren't..?" I was horrified that my best friend might have been assaulted and I didn't know.**

"**No, no, no." She cut me off. "It was Jules."**

"**That's almost as bad. Did it hurt?"**

"**Yeah but not for long, of course he didn't last long so it's hard to tell." She laughed. "He was kind of distant and rough, just like his personality."**

"**What about Rixon? Does it hurt with him?"**

"**No it doesn't hurt with him. I think he cares about me." She smiled. I hoped she was right.**

"**So then it's more like making love with him." I surmised.**

"**I wouldn't go that far. When I think of making love I think of flowers and candles and all the mushy stuff, that's not Rixon. That's what I'm talking about though, that's what you want, the wedding, the reception, the wedding night bliss. Most of the kids our age just want to experience new things, it's new and exciting. Someday you'll understand when you meet someone who you don't want to take your hands off."**

**Too late, already have that problem. "Do you ever...umm...fantasize?" I swallowed, this was a loaded question.**

"**Of course, I don't know a teenager yet who doesn't fantasize. Other than maybe you." Wrong again. I looked away avoiding her eyes. "I turn on the T.V. and that part of my brain clicks on, or walking down the street and seeing a cute guy and Rixon...don't get me started on him." She giggled. Rixon is Irish, he still has the accent even after years of living here in the United States. He's tall, stringy, with a hawk-like nose and shaggy blue-black hair and Vee and a lot of other girls in our school think he's 'sexy to the max'. He has good taste in people, I mean he's dating Vee and he's Patch's only other close friend. Something about him though throws me off. He's been nothing but polite to me, I just get this feeling I shouldn't trust him. Patch does though so I just try to ignore it.**

"**Do you..I mean have you..." I draw in a deep breath before asking my next question. Vee is now sitting on the bed with me in her pink work-out suit with writing across her butt looking at me with focused attention. I have to be careful to not look at her too long so I'm not giving myself away, but not so much that I look like I'm avoiding her eyes. So far she thinks it's all from my nerves over the topic, and part of that is true but what it really comes down to is the same thing that's been haunting me. Patch. "Have you ever experimented?" The words tumbled out of my mouth so fast I was surprised Vee understood them.**

"**Damn babe, you really are full of questions today. What gives, why are you suddenly so inquisitive about sex? Did you find somebody you like? Does somebody got little Nora all hot and bothered?" I blanched, we can NOT go there. She must not have caught that because she went on. "A few positions that's about it. I'm still not sure where things are headed with Rixon and we have a lot of years to experiment. I have to save something for my future husband." She winked coyly at me making me laugh. Things were getting dangerously close to her finding out, better to end the conversation before hit shit the proverbial fan.**

"**Did you find something to wear yet?"**

"**No I didn't, we may need to go shopping." She lit up at the word shopping. Vee loved to shop, me, not so much. **

"**Didn't you just buy a couple hundred dollars on clothes last week? Your mom's going to pitch a fit if you use her credit card again." I warned her. "Maybe you should use some of your savings this time."**

"**I can't, my piggy bank is officially anorexic." **

"**Could be all those doughnuts and pastries you eat." I teased.**

"**I've been following a new diet." She sniffed.**

"**What diet is that?" I raised my eyebrow.**

"**It's eating food from each color group."**

"**So what did you have for lunch today?" I asked her knowingly.**

"**A chocolate heart and marshmallow shaped flowers, like the Easter peeps." **

**I snorted. "I don't think that's what they had in mind when they said different colors, Vee."**

"**It's not my fault that the first three letters in the word diet spell die and that's exactly what they make me want to do! Rixon never complains about my voluptuous figure anyway."**

"**That's good. If we're going shopping we'd better get going so we have time to get ready." I coaxed her, our conversation forgotten. Almost.**

**We pulled up to the mall and Vee parked her purple neon in the closest spot she could find. That didn't surprise me, Vee wasn't exactly your fitness buff.**

"**So what store do you want to hit before we have to go?" She'd already found her outfit for tonight at the last store. Without a pause or second thought she said. "Victoria Secret."**

"**Wait, what? Why?" It wasn't exactly my kind of store. I had been working on being a little more girly, I had a long way to go before needing anything Victoria Secret specialized in.**

"**See. Now your being a prude again. If you don't want to look at intimate apparel then look through their Pink line, they have a lot of cute stuff." She suggested as we walked in.**

"**Fine." I muttered, heading towards the pajamas, work-out clothes and yoga pants they had. **

**I selected a couple things I wanted to get, a pair of leggings that would match the shimmery silver button down blouse I had found on clearance at the last store that I could layer over a black tank top. Vee still wasn't done so I started wandering looking at things to kill the time while she continued to shop. I should have known better. Satin and silk hung on almost every wall reminding me of Patch's bed sheets. Navy, maroon and black lace bra's made to reduce, lift or create the perfect bosom were all over and my body suddenly burned where Patch's hand had been cradling my breast. It was a perfect fit. I tried to turn away from the bra section only to come face to face with lacy lingerie. Did he like corsets that pushed breasts up or teddy's with stockings? Maybe a long silk shirt? _Stop Nora! You have to stop thinking this way he's your BEST FRIEND, not your boyfriend and if you want to be able to face him tonight you have to quit this! _ I needed air, I needed to get out of there. I quickly paid for my items and went out to the seating area outside the store to wait for Vee. Why had I thought I'd be okay in there? I shouldn't be looking at lingerie or even be near it, lingerie made me think about things that are sexy which leads to thinking about kissing which lead to Patch and his damn wondering hands...okay, my INVOLUNTARY hip thrusting didn't help, but neither did his body pushing back. Dammit_, here we go again._**

"**Hey babe, I was looking all over the store for you what are you doing out here?" Vee came walking out of the store.**

"**Oh, I uh, I was done shopping." I smiled up at her weakly, still trying to get myself under control.**

"**_Are you okay? You look a little flushed, your cheeks are all pink and your breathing funny. You're not getting sick are you? Please tell me your not getting sick! It's Valentines Day and we always go out on Valentines Day!" __She cried._**

"**I'm fine, Vee, really. I just needed some air I got hot in there." No sooner had I said the words I regretted them. Vee's eyes twinkled.**

"**You got hot...in Victoria Secret? What kind of 'hot' did you get? Like hot and bothered or like I melting in the afternoon sun hot? After our little conversation I'm guessing it's the first one." I wanted to punch her.**

"**Yes Vee, that's exactly what it was (actually that was true), I got so hot and bothered I had to come out here and sit down." I glared. "If you keep speaking like that I'm not going to talk to you anymore about things." I threatened.**

"**Speaking of not talking..." Uh oh. How did I walk in to that one? I should have seen that a mile away. Letting out an internal groan I braced myself to hear what was next. "What's up with you and Patch? We go back to sandbox days and you two haven't been apart a single day, not even when you caught pneumonia and were in the hospital. What gives?" Shit. There was no way out now.**

"**I don't know, ever since my make-over I've been trying really hard to change things about me, not just dressing more feminine and it's sometimes made things weird between us." **

"**Weird how?" She narrowed her eyes at me. "You're finally waking up to notice he's a guy, a sinfully delicious guy?"**

"**It's not like that with us." Or at least it never used to be.**

"**Why not? You guys are practically married. You spend most your time together, even when you were dating Scott you were with Patch more than him. You sleep in the same bed, you eat together, hang out together, you're best friends, you know everything there is to know about each other. Need I go on?"**

"**I don't see him that way, he doesn't see me that way. Besides, it would ruin everything and I won't lose my friendship with him because of some stupid..." Oh. Shit.**

"**HA! I KNEW it! Nora Grey you have a crush on him!" To her credit for as much as she didn't trust Patch she was taking this remarkably well. The problem was, it wasn't a crush.**

"**I don't have a crush on him." **

**I could feel Vee's eyes penetrating me like she was trying to read my mind. Finally she seemed to get the answer she was looking for. **

"**You're right, you don't have a crush on him. Yet."**

"**What do you mean 'not yet'?! That's never going to happen." We had reached the neon and I was hoping beyond all hopes that this conversation was not going to continue all the way back to her place.**

"**I mean exactly what I said. Not yet. It will happen and when it does don't say I didn't warn you." Vee put the key in the ignition and the rest of the way back to her house she talked and I stared off into space. Was I really doomed? A sense of foreboding came over me.**

**By the time we arrived back at Vee's house it was time for us to get ready to go. Saved by the clock I sighed in relief.**

**Vee is voluptuous, Scandinavia fair, and in an unorthodox way, incredibly sexy. Our friendship is the only thing that keeps me from being obsessed with jealousy. If you were to compare us, the only thing I have going for me are my legs and maybe my metabolism. Definitely not my hair.**

**Tonight Vee is sporting a new pair of fitting black jeans, black is slimming she informed me, a sandblasted green silk blouse that she has has layered over a black tank top that has black lace that will show through the blouse courtesy of the buttons she is leaving undone with a pair of heals. I watched as she applied her make-up, creating soft smoky eyes with her shadow, a light blush to the smooth skin of her cheeks, a coat of mascara after a thin line of black eyeliner, just enough to accent her already startling green eyes before applying a medium shade of lipstick and a shiny gloss. Next she combed out her hair and put it in a french twist with a few strands strategically placed left down and curled into soft ringlets. She was sexy in a classy way that I will never be. Patch and Vee were right, sexy and naughty aren't going to be words ever used to describe me. It made me a little sad, what girl doesn't dream of being sexy when she's older. I know that I'm pretty, I'm not anything special, just an average girl. Normally it doesn't bother me, I'm thankful for what I have, but sometimes you just want a little more.**

**After Vee was finished I slipped into my black leggings, slid my tank top over my head then buttoned up my blouse before tying it at my belly button showing about an inch and a half of skin, I could at least _try _to be sexy. Then I slid into a pair of black flats. I took a look in the mirror inspecting my outfit and after a few minor adjustments I shaped the hair framing my face around my finger, the way I'd learned to manage my natural curls, and... voila! Half-decent spirals. I stepped back from Vee's mirror for another twice-over and with Vee's enthusiastic approval we headed out for the club where we were meeting Patch and Rixon. I was very excited to spend the evening out and since it was Patch's birthday and he had scored us all fake ID's a little while back, I thought I deserved a couple drinks. New Nora needed to have some fun and I hadn't spent time with Patch in over a month. More important then that was my sudden need to shake this sense of foreboding that overcame me at the mall, the feeling that something bad was going to happen tonight. Something very bad, the kind of thing that would change lives. It must be the hormones and anxiety causing it. I hope...**


	10. Chapter 10 - VALENTINES DAY

I AM NOT TRYING TO PROMOTE TEEN DRINKING. IT IS A COMMON THING AMONG TEENAGERS SO I DIDN'T FEEL IT WAS OFF BASE IN THAT SENSE. I'M TRYING TO KEEP THEM IN CHARACTER AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE WHILE STILL MAKING IT MY OWN STORY. IF THE DRINKING OFFENDS YOU I APOLOGIZE.

* * *

_**CHAPTER 10**_

_**VALENTINES DAY – SWEET 16**_

_**PATCH**_

**I was pulling out of our driveway when my dad waved for me to stop. **

"**Hey son, I know you're on your way out to meet your friends I just wanted to remind you that your mom and I won't be home tonight so we expect you on your best behavior, no bringing strange girls home." **

"**No girls with tattoo's and piercings. Got it." I smirked at my dad who rolled his eyes.**

"**That's not what I meant by strange, Patch." He chuckled.**

"**I know, I won't bring anybody home that I don't know."**

"**Patch." My dad warned me. "I don't want anybody here while we're gone whether you know them or not."**

"**Can Nora come over? She can be kind of strange." I grinned.**

"**You really are something kid." He shook his head and chuckled. "Your mom and I love you, have a good night with your friends and you know that Nora is always the exception, she's welcome here anytime. Be careful and we'll see you tomorrow afternoon." **

"**I love you too, give mom my love. Have fun spoiling her and I'll see you tomorrow." He tapped my door and gave me a little wave which I returned and then eased my jeep out of the drive before turning to head to the Devils Handbag where everyone was waiting for me.**

**I pulled into the parking lot and immediately saw Nora standing with Vee in the first parking space by the door. I had to smile, only Nora would show up early and save me the best parking spot and I bet Vee had complained the whole time. **

**It was so good to see Nora, I couldn't wait to spend the night out with her. I really had missed her, enough to forget the reason I had missed her, the reason she had avoided me. I barely had my door open and my feet out before Vee was complaining.**

"**Hurry up Cipriano! I've got a hot boyfriend waiting for me in there and I wanna get my groove on."**

"**It's his birthday, leave him alone." Nora defended me.**

"**I'm pretty sure the 'groove' thing went out in the '70's, Vee." I smirked.**

**I could hear the music and the people already from the parking lot. It was going to be packed tonight. They had a DJ spinning tunes for the night and since it was Valentines day songs about sex and romance would be the menu, by romance I mean sex since that's pretty much what romance means to most teenagers. I held the door for the girls and a split second later Nora was dragging me behind her and she was being pulled through the throng of kids by Vee to what I assumed would be Rixon, she must have spotted him. Her height gave her an advantage most girls don't have, she was almost six feet tall, that's quite tall for a girl. When the girls finally came to a stop we were standing by a booth that Rixon had somehow snagged us.**

**The girls had their coats on since it was cold in Coldwater Creek in the winter. When Nora started to remove her jacket I immediately did the gentleman thing and held it for her to remove her arms. With her back thankfully to me I drew in a sharp breath when I took in her outfit for the night. Any chance of forgetting the reason I hadn't seen her flew right out the window and all I could think was how her skin had felt under my hands. Not exactly best friend friendly thoughts. Against my own better judgment my eyes gave her a full body scan before resting for a few moments on the tantalizing exposed skin between her shirt she had tied off at her belly button and the top of her low slung black leggings. In that brief time the room temperature shot up ten degrees and my pants got slightly uncomfortable. With the song Bad Girlfriend blaring in the background I needed a few minutes to collect myself away from Nora, the best way I could think to do that was to offer everyone drinks. Her and I were both going to need one if she was going to have enough confidence to dance and me enough sanity to survive the night.**

"**I'm going up to the bar to get something to drink, do you guys want anything? It's on me."**

"**I'll take a shot of Tuaca." Nora said without hesitation. **

"**Starting with the hard stuff already? You don't exactly have a high tolerance for alcohol, are you sure that's what you want?" I cautioned her.**

"**Quit parenting her and get her damn drink, we're here to have fun tonight. I'll take a strawberry daiquiri with coconut, please." Vee stuck up for Nora.**

"**I'm NOT carrying a girly drink like that across the bar." I have a reputation to uphold that did not include pink drinks in girly glasses that should never have made its début in a bar like The Devils Handbag.**

**Rixon laughed. "I'll go with you, I'm secure enough in my manhood to carry her drink."**

"**It has nothing to do with my manhood and everything to do with my principles." I told him as we weaved our way to the bar.**

"**Tell yourself whatever makes you sleep better at night." He laughed.**

"**Thanks." I said dryly.**

**Before he could respond with another comeback the bartender was in front of us. "What'll it be?"**

"**I need two beers, two shots of Tuaca.." **

"**And a strawberry daiquiri, double the alcohol." Rixon pitched in.**

"**I could have ordered it."**

"**I know, but I didn't want you to do anything that was against your principles." He smirked.**

**I rolled my eyes at him.**

"**Nora's looking hot tonight." Grrr. I trusted Rixon, but I didn't appreciate guys noticing her like that, even if the guy was me and even if it was true. Misinterpreting my face he added, "Oh come on, you can't tell me you didn't notice!" I punched him in the arm in response. Hard.**

"**You have a girlfriend, stop checking out MY friend out." I grabbed my beer the bartender just sat down, paid and took a long swig of it.**

"**Hate to break it to you, but she's not yours, Patch."**

"**Yes she is, she'll ****_always_**** be mine." I growled.**

"**No she won't. Look, I know how close you guys are, but she's over Scott and some guy tonight or two years from now is going to scoop her off her feet." I already knew that, that didn't mean I wanted to have it thrown in my face.**

"**You really know how to make a friend feel good on their birthday."**

"**Are you saying now would be a bad time to tell you that I saw Scott here tonight and he's helping the DJ? Or that the minute he spotted Nora he hadn't taken his eyes off her?"**

"**Just fucking perfect." I muttered before pushing my way back to the girls with our drinks.**

**As soon as I saw Nora I felt a bit better. Her face lit up when she spotted me and she jumped up grabbing the first shot, held it up in the air waiting to make a toast. **

"**Italian liquor from an Italian stallion, my kind of celebration." She smirked and winked at me.**

"**You know what they say, if you want a stallion you have to go Italian." I teased her.**

"**Happy Birthday to my best friend. Your sweet sixteen so this night is to honor you." We clinked glasses and bottles. "I don't know about you but I plan on getting a buzz and letting Vee drag me all over the dance floor." Nora threw back her shot and made a face.**

"**That good?" I laughed.**

"**Feeling the burn. A couple more and.."**

"**You'll be feeling the floor?" I raised my eyebrow at her.**

**The next song that came on was Porn Star Dancing by My Darkest Days. As soon as the first few notes played Vee was grabbing Nora's arm excitedly.**

"**Hurry up and take your other shot, I love this song, I wanna dance!" **

**Nora dutifully downed her shot and followed Vee out into the crowd of kids dancing. I could still see her from where we were and while she had improved some since the last time we danced she could use a little more help. She looked like she was starting to have fun and that's what mattered. When the next song came on she looked like her buzz was settling in. **

**Vee and Nora stayed out dancing through quite a few songs before Nora came back to the table saying she needed a drink. After that shot she returned to the dance floor just in time for the song Cyclone to come on. Her and Vee were dancing together when I saw a blonde guy that looked a few years older come up behind Nora and place his hands on her hips to dance. I didn't see him ask her and I could tell by the look on her face she was instantly uncomfortable, buzzed or not. **

"**I'm going to dance with Nora after I get that creeps hands off her." I told Rixon over my shoulder as I headed into the crowd. **

**When I reached Nora I looked the guy, who was a couple of inches shorter than me and nowhere near my build, in the eyes and asked Nora who her friend was.**

"**I don't know him. I haven't met him before."**

"**Did he ask you before he put his hands on you?" I was still speaking to her, but looking at him. He finally spoke up.**

"**Who are you? Her boyfriend?" His tone was mocking. He had already irritated me, next I would be angry and that could lead to pissed, not pretty.**

"**Something like that. Nora, would you like to dance?" This time I looked at her. She still had that tightness around her eyes, but she was visibly more relaxed by my presence and that gave me a good feeling. In the background I could still hear the song playing. It probably wasn't the best song to be dancing to, but this guy needed to learn respect before he leaned it the hard way. By hard, I mean my fist.**

"**Do you want to dance?" The blonde turned to Nora. For a minute I saw the old insecurity pass across her face and then she reigned it in and told him no, I had asked her first. Liquid courage or bravery it didn't matter I was proud of her.**

"**You know what, I'm out of here. Your loss." He turned to leave and I heard Nora say 'good riddance' under her breath and I had to chuckle.**

"**You get em' tiger." I smiled down at her.**

"**I thought you asked me to dance?"**

"**I did."**

"**Then shut up and dance with me!" She laughed. I didn't have to be told twice. The song was almost over so I turned her around and pulled her back towards me with my hands firmly on her pants and I could barely contain the groan threatening to escape me when I realized just how low those form-fitting pants sat on her hips.**

**The song continued to play as I very gently guided her hips helping her find her rhythm.**

_**She moves her body like a cyclone**_

_**She makes me want to do it all night long **_

_**Going hard when they turn the spotlight on**_

_**Because she moves her body like a cyclone**_

_**A mighty cyclone**_

**We danced to several more songs before we decided to go get another drink. **

**I slid into the booth next to Nora who was talking animatedly to Vee. She was riding a pretty good buzz and the changes she had made to herself intensified. I had to smile at how happy she looked in that moment.**

"**Drinks are on me this time." Rixon announced. "What does everybody want?"**

**I took the last long drink of my beer and almost choked when Nora said she wanted two shots of Tequila. **

"**Nora, Tequila? You can't drink two shots of Tequila back to back, you're going to be lucky if you survive one shot." I warned her. I didn't want her getting sick. She looked buzzed yes, but not drunk, that was a good thing at least.**

"**I don't want both of them." She rolled her eyes. "One's for you, it's your birthday and we're going to celebrate with a body shot." If I had anything in my mouth I would have choked for sure.**

"**You want to do a body shot? Are you serious?" Vee sounded as shocked as I felt. "With Patch. As in your going to let him lick salt off of you, down the shot with no hands off of your BODY and then suck a lemon out from between your teeth?" She looked almost sick and that took me from not wanting to tempt myself to prodding the proverbial bull, the bull being Vee. **

**I smirked. "Do you know another way to do a body shot?" I raised my eyebrow in question at Vee.**

"**No." She sighed.**

"**That's what I want so Rixon, two shots of Tequila with Lemon and salt." She beamed up at him with a look of excitement. It was a good thing I could hold my alcohol because I had a feeling Nora would be doing the one tequila, two tequila, three tequila floor pretty soon IF she kept it up. Just because she was riding the happy train now didn't mean that a couple more shots wouldn't find her praying to the porcelain Gods.**

"**Anything else for you, Patch? Vee I'll grab you another Daiquiri" Rixon asked me.**

"**I'll take a honey flavored Jack Daniels straight." That was my drink of choice.**

**Rixon left to round-up our drink order and I sat back listening to the girls for a few minutes before making a sweep of the cluster of people. As soon as he arrived back with our requested drinks Nora was up and out of her seat. **

"**Your first, Patch!" She handed me the salt shaker and my shot of tequila, but kept the wedge of lime they had instead of lemon to place when we were ready.**

"**Alright, alright. If you lay down I can place the glass on your stomach." Her stomach was flat enough that I would have no problem sitting it there and taking the shot.**

"**No! It's your birthday we're doing this right. It goes right here between my cleavage." She reached for the shot.**

"**Nora.." I started to warn her. This couldn't possibly end well.**

"**Don't Nora me, we're going to do it my way." She could be a bossy little thing. Fine, if she really wants to play it this way we'll see what she thinks of this...**

"**Lean back so I can put the salt on. " People were starting to look. She wanted a show, she'd get one. I put my beer bottle against the exposed skin of her abdominal muscles so the condensation would wet the skin just enough to make the salt stick.**

"**Hey! What was that for?" Nora almost jolted up off the table, but I pinned her hips faster than she could move.**

"**You wanted to do body shots and since it's my birthday and you picked where the shot glass is going I'm picking where the salt goes." I smirked at the shock that crossed her face before she covered it and her eyes lit up with a determination. **

"**Fine, but it's your turn next so remember that." Her eyes narrowed as if her threat would scare me. I almost laughed. "I'm glad you find this amusing." She said dryly, but her tone had an under current of her own amusement.**

"**Are we doing this or talking?" She laid back and I put the bottle to her again since our conversation had given her body a chance to absorb the water droplets. I shook the salt shaker all around her belly button. Being friends with someone as long as we had been you learn a few things about them...Like where they're ticklish. I suppressed a smile when I saw her shiver. I put my face almost touching her and looked up at her eyes, she was looking down watching me so with our eyes locked I slowly licked all around her belly button several circles before dipping the tip of my tongue in it. I heard her give a soft moan and buck up into my hands that were still on her hips. That little sound shot straight to my groin. With my eyes still holding hers I bent and removed the shot glass from her full breasts. I downed the shot and leaned down to get the lime wedge that Rixon had placed in Nora's mouth. I bit into it and let my lips linger there for just a moment longer than necessary. She wanted to do body shots I might as well make it worth the torment. The crowd that had gathered to watch erupted in cheers and whistles. Nora's chest was rising a little faster than it had been. **

"**My turn." She looked like she was aiming for confidence, but it came out as breathless.**

"**Do you worst." I bowed my head dramatically.**

"**Lay down on the table." The shyness had passed and she was back in control. This time it was her that wore the expression promising trouble. I wasn't worried, what can she do to me that I hadn't done to her? It wasn't like I was going to be holding a shot glass in my cleavage.**

"**As you wish." I laid down on the table. **

"**Rixon can I borrow your beer please?" I heard her ask.**

"**Yes ma'am."**

**I started to pull my shirt from the waist band of my black jeans when she stopped me.**

"**Allow me." She finished untucking it and raised it up my stomach. I didn't fail to notice the way she let her thumbs both trail up over the lines of my six pack as she slid it up. She was really playing with fire. **

"**Nora.." I let my voice carry my warning.**

"**Yes?" She asked in a voice too sweet to be good.**

"**Be nice."**

"**Oh I plan on being VERY nice, just like you were to me."**

**This was really not good. I suppressed a groan. She ran the cold bottle along my neck leaving a trail of condensation from just below my ear lobe down my neck after the contour of my jaw line. She applied a generous amount of salt and I closed my eyes for a minute to prepare myself. Before I'd even opened them I felt the first swipe of her warm tongue grazing up my neck. When she reached my ear she nipped it and I almost yelped. That would ****_not _****have been manly. I took a shallow breath and felt her lick me again, removing all the salt, but before she pulled away she nipped my chin. My eyes locked on to hers and I could see the smile she was trying to control. It's almost over I told myself. She had placed the shot glass fairly high on me so that was good, less torture then if it were lower. **

"**Happy birthday, Patch." I heard her whisper, then she lifted the shot glass with her mouth, only she spilled the Tequila somewhat all over my stomach. It didn't drench me, but it did leave a mess and by the look on her face she'd done that on purpose. I was about to raise up to wipe myself off when she bent and with her eyes on mine ran her tongue along the waistband of my low slung jeans. I growled which did nothing to stop her, if anything she seemed to think it was funny and her hot little mouth started tasting every inch of the skin she had uncovered. With every flick, sweep and... did she just bite me?! I felt my self grow impossibly harder. When she reached the hem of my raised shirt she rose off of me and Rixon handed me the lime.**

**Right before she bit into it I heard her whisper to me. "Pay backs a bitch." Then her mouth was on mine. ****_Holy Fuck..._**

**The group of people around us grew loud again, but I was locked within Nora's gaze. Her eyes were dark with...desire? She was obviously very buzzed and I wanted to shake my head clear, to gather my thoughts but I couldn't look away. **

"**Want to dance?" I saw her lips move and unconsciously licked my bottom and saw her eyes drop to follow the path of my tongue. Her words were lost among the warnings my brain was firing at me. The problem was, I was just as buzzed now as she was.**

"**What?" My voice came out a little to husky to be friendly.**

"**Want to dance?" I heard her repeat with a chuckle.**

"**Sure." I swallowed. Dancing was safer than more body shots. I tucked my shirt back into my pants and followed her to the dance floor. **

**The notes of the next song started to play as we reached the floor. Casual Sex by My Darkest Days flooded the room. **

_**...I'm never gonna fall**_

_**but I'm never hard to catching**_

_**She say's she's cool with it**_

_**She's down with it**_

_**There's nothing wrong with it**_

_**It's easier this way**_

_**She so cool with it**_

_**She's down with it**_

_**There's nothing wrong with it**_

_**Don't want it any other way**_

_**Just your typical hardcore casual sex**_

_**We're single but we're lovers**_

_**Crazy for each other**_

_**Just your typical hardcore casual sex**_

_**We're wild under the covers**_

_**Crazy for each other**_

_**Everybody wants a lover like that...**_

**I tried not to think about the message of the song, or about the way my mind was enticed by the thought of having a friends with benefits relationship with Nora. Before I knew it the song ended and a new one began. I hadn't heard this one before, it was slower and I was buzzed enough, or stupid enough to stay, turning Nora around to face me and pull her in closer.**

"**I love this song!" I heard her say. "You have to listen to the words." Her eyes twinkled. I felt her tighten her grip around my neck and her fingers were playing with the longer hair that was just starting to curl at the bottom along my neck. Warnings should have gone off louder this time, but I was to sucked in to our own personal world.**

"**This song goes out to all the lovers out there. Happy Valentines. Enrique." The DJ announced. **

**As the notes drifted louder I instinctively put my hands low on her hips, bringing her almost flush with my body. I told myself it was to guide her movements, to help her since she hadn't been dancing very long. That's what I told myself anyway. The words reached my ears at the same time her body reached mine and the room fell away as a bubble descended on us. It was only us and the almost haunting words of the song as she softly sang.**

_**Heartbeat**_

_****_**_[Enrique]_**_**  
**__**Heartbeat Heart-heartbeat**_**_[Enrique]_**_**  
**__**I saw you talking on the phone,**__**  
**__**And know that you were not alone.**__**  
**__**But you're stealing my heart away,**__**  
**__**Yeah you're stealing my heart away.**_**_[Nicole]_**_**  
**__**You're acting like you're on your own,**__**  
**__**But I saw you standing with a girl (hmm)**__**  
**__**Stop tryin' to steal my heart away**__**  
**__**Stop tryin' to steal my heart away**_**_[Enrique]_**_**  
**__**I don't know where we going**__**  
**__**I don't know who we are**_**_[Enrique]_**_**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat**__**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (he said to me)**__**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (running through me)**__**  
**__**Feel your heartbeat**__**  
**__**(She said:)**__**  
**_**_[Nicole]_**_**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (she said to me)**__**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (she said to me)**__**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (running through me)**__**  
**__**Your heartbeat, feel your heartbeat**_**_[Enrique]_**_**  
**__**Maybe it's the way you move,**__**  
**__**You got me dreaming like a fool.**__**  
**__**That I could steal your heart away,**__**  
**__**I could steal your heart away.**_**_[Nicole]_**_**  
**__**No matter what it is you think**__**  
**__**I'm not the kind of girl to blink,**__**  
**__**And give my heart away**__**  
**__**Stop trying to steal my heart away**_

**_[Enrique & Nicole]_**_**  
**__**I don't know where we going**__**  
**__**I don't know who we are**_**_[Enrique]_**_**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (he said to me)**__**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (he said to me)**__**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (running through me)**__**  
**__**Your heartbeat**__**  
**__**Feel your heartbeat**__**  
**__**(She said:)**__**  
**_**_[Nicole]_**_**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (she said to me)**__**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (she said to me)**__**  
**__**I can feel your heartbeat (running through me)**__**  
**__**(Feel your heartbeat)**_**_[Enrique & Nicole]_**_**  
**__**Stop stealing my heart away**__**  
**__**Stop stealing my heart away**__**  
**__**Stop stealing my heart away**__**  
**__**You're stealing my heart away**_**_[Enrique & Nicole]_**_**  
**__**I don't know where we're going**__**  
**__**I don't know who we are**__**  
**__**It feels like we are flowing**__**  
**__**High above the stars (stars, the stars, the stars, the stars...)**__**Ooooooo;**__**  
**__**Ooooooo**__**Heartbeat, heart-heartbeat**_**_[Enrique & Nicole]_**_**  
**__**I can feel it, I can feel it, I can feel it**__**  
**__**I can feel it, I can f..**_

**_can feel your heartbeat (he said to me)  
I can feel your heartbeat (he said to me)  
I can feel your heartbeat (running through me)  
Your heartbeat  
Feel your heartbeat  
(She said:)  
[Nicole]  
I can feel your heartbeat (she said to me)  
I can feel your heartbeat (she said to me)  
I can feel your heartbeat (running through me)  
(Your heartbeat, feel your heartbeat-beat-beat)_**

**[Enrique & Nicole]**  
**Stop stealing my heart away (Just tell it to me girl)**  
**Stop stealing my heart away (Ooo) (Give it to me boy)**  
**Stop stealing my heart away (Just say it to me girl)**  
**You're stealing my heart away**

**Stop stealing my heart away (I can feel your heartbeat)**  
**Stop stealing my heart away (I can feel your heartbeat)**  
**Stop stealing my heart away (I can feel your heartbeat)**  
**Your heartbeat, your heartbeat.**

**I was mesmerized by the words of the song. I could see why she liked it. The next song began without a thought of backing away. Down On Me by Jerimih featuring 50 Cent... I spun her around so her back was to me, but kept the space between us close.**

**_...Girl you are a beauty well I am a beast_**

**_They must have been trippin _**

**_to let me off the leash_**

**_I like the way you grind with that booty on_**

**_Shorty you a dime why you lookin _**

**_lonely_**

**_We'll by another round and it's all on me..._**

…**_..._**

**_Gurl all I really want is you down on me_**

**_Put it down on me_**

**We were so caught up in the song that when it was ending I didn't even see Rixon approach until I felt him tap on my shoulder.**

"**I just thought you should know that Scott has watched you two like a hawk, especially since the two of you took shots from each other and he's headed this direction right now." He tilted his head to the right and I caught sight of him. Scott is 6' 7 putting him a good five inches over me in height. He's strong, but I'm stronger and if he want's to challenge me over Nora he better believe I'll bring it. His little gold earring in his right ear and his 'boyish charm and money' won't stop me from wiping the floor with him. Compared to me, Scott was a wimp.**

"**I knew you'd never be able to keep your filthy hands off of her." Scott sneered. "Isn't there one girl in this town you don't have to seduce?"**

"**I'm not seducing anyone and even if I did it wouldn't be your business."**

"**When it comes to Nora it **_**IS **_**my business." He glared.**

"**Not anymore, she broke up with you, she's moved on."**

"**She's moved on to you you mean? That's a step in the wrong direction. I wouldn't want to be associated with you."**

"**Then it's a good thing we don't associate. Get lost Scott, you're not welcome here."**

"**You don't own or control me, I've never pledged fidelity to you." Scott looked at me with disgust clear on his face.**

"**This is your last chance. Get. Out. Of. Here. Leave Nora alone or you will pay for it." My voice was hard as steel. **

"**When you break her heart, and you will, it's going to be me there to pick up the pieces and put her back together."**

**I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. I wasn't going to break her heart, was I? We were just having fun, I wasn't seducing her. **

…**...**

* * *

**_NORA_**

**_When I saw Scott approaching I thought for sure there was going to be a fight. Neither of them were one to walk away. I didn't appreciate Scott's implying that he had ownership of me, that I would ever take him back, and worse of all that Patch was seducing me. It had been my idea to do the body shots and my idea to dance, not Patch's._**

**_Patch looked so tense, here it was his birthday and we were out having a great time together and Scott had to go and blow it. I'd spent a month ignoring him before getting my nerve up to face him, the least I could do was make his birthday a good one. I just had to figure out how to get us back on track and my mind was still hazy with alcohol. _**

**_I was deep in thought when the lyrics of the song playing reached my ears. They hadn't been playing rock tonight and the irony of the song wasn't missed by me and I gave a little snort as the next bar was sung. _**

**_NEXT CONTESTANT_**

**_BY: NICKELBACK_**

**Is that your hand on my girlfriend?_  
_Is that your hand?_  
_I wish you'd do it again_  
_I'll watch you leave here limping_  
_I wish you'd do it again_  
_I'll watch you leave here limping_  
_There goes the next contestant**

**_I wasn't Patch's girlfriend, but I knew if Scott or anyone else laid a hand on me they'd leave here limping...or worse. Then my drunk mind spoke for me before my rational thinking could process what I was saying._**

"**_The thing is, Patch, I'm _**_not_**_ his anymore. Maybe I should teach him a lesson." The words sliding somewhat slurred from my mouth._**

"**_What kind of lesson did you have in mind?" Patch's face that had looked so grim a moment ago started to light up with amusement at the thought of me teaching Scott a lesson._**

"**_Well..." I started out slowly, not sure how to put what I wanted to say into words without letting my inexperience and lack of confidence in this area sway his answer. "He thinks it's _**_you_**_ seducing _**_me_**_...so what if it was me seducing you..." I looked up at him from under my eyelashes._**

"**_What?! You want to seduce me?" He laughed._**

"**_Do you have a problem with that?" My indignation sparked. "I'm not good enough is that it?"_**

"**_Whoa, whoa, whoa, Nora." He held up his hands in mock surrender. "If you want to try to seduce me by all means have at it. It's just a bit of a shock to me, the whole night has been. First it was the body shots, now you're proposing seduction. My brain is trying to keep up."_**

"**_I know, I don't know what I'm doing I..."_**

"**_You want to have some fun and you want to make him as angry as he made you. Trust me, I get it. You don't have to explain to me. You know I'm down for anything devious, especially when it involves pissing Scott off." He gave me a lecherous grin._**

"**_I don't know what to do though, this isn't exactly my strong point, maybe I should forget about it."_**

"**_Nora, stop. You're over thinking it. You were doing a fine job of making him jealous before he interrupted."_**

**_He was right, Scott hadn't known it was me initiating all of it, but it had caught his attention. With a smug look I asked Patch for another dance._**

"**_You just can't keep your hands off of me tonight." He teased. _**

"**_Where's the fun in that?" I said coyly, earning me a laugh._**

"**_I like seeing this side of you, she should come out and play more often." He teased._**

"**_Less talk, more dancing." I drug him back on to the dance floor that was packed with bodies. When Scott had charged towards us we'd met him off to the side of the throng of people, if anything happened we wouldn't be right in the center of things, not that we wouldn't be in the center once people realized there was a fight to see._**

**_They were playing a slow song I hadn't heard before so I wrapped my arms around Patch's neck and let him pull me close to him. We still had a couple of inches between us, but it would be impossible for anyone to see that wasn't up close to us. It felt good to be close to Patch again. I realized how much I'd missed it. We still hadn't had that talk, how would he feel finding out that I had dreamed about us having sex? I could feel the blush start to creep into my face and buried my head in his shoulder to hide it._**

**_Patch always offered me that feeling of safety, things with us were comfortable. He kept me on my toes, often leaving me tongue-tied or furious, but never for long. We hadn't fought like other people do, we just sometimes had very different opinions on how to handle things, but that had nothing to do with how we felt or thought about each other, it had everything to do with whatever the subject was that we were debating._**

**_I took a quick peak at Patch and he caught me, giving me a sweet smile that he reserved only for me. He hadn't worn his trademark baseball cap tonight so it was easier to get a good look at him. He really was gorgeous. I could see why the girls flocked to him. His face alone was a picture of perfection, strong and masculine. The solid feel of him as he held me was doing strange things to my body again. I was so lost in thought that I hadn't noticed the music change again until he suddenly spun me out away from him and pulled my back against the front of him. I squealed in surprise. _**

**_Then things started to really heat up. We found our rhythm together, his hands guiding my hips since I was still getting the hang of this. I could tell already that confidence was the key to this type of dancing, you couldn't be afraid to touch your partner. Every brush of his finger tips on the strip of skin between the hem of my shirt and the waistband of my pants had shivers racing through me. Several times I had brushed against his groin and I was sure I felt the tale-tell signs of arousal. It had started out as innocent fun, then turned to a game of 'paybacks are a bitch', now it was...a slow burn. It felt like somebody was turning the dial on the heater higher and higher, little by little as each song ended and another began. We had started out as one couple among countless, now we were one couple all alone, flowing like a river into the sea we were being swept along by the romance of Valentines day, the celebration of his birthday, the energy of the room, the hormones of the teens and young adults around us, the fog of alcohol and feel of each others bodies._**

**_I closed my eyes and let the words of the song that was beginning wash over me echoing in my ear, then I realized it was Patch whispering the words of the song in my ear..._**

**_STRIP_**

**_BY: CHRIS BROWN_**

**_..._Nice thighs, nice waist, and you know I can't forget about your face**  
**But don't none of that matter I'm about to make your pockets fatter**

**_[Chorus:]_**  
**Girl I just wanna see you strip, right now cause it's late, babe**  
**Girl I just wanna see you strip, girl take your time with it**  
**Girl I just wanna see you strip God damn you're sexy (for melee)**  
**God damn you're sexy! (babbyyy) God damn you're sexy!**  
**Girl I just wanna see you...**

_**I let him pull me closer still, his hands were traveling lower on my back side than they had ever been. His breath was tickling my ear and wetness was starting to pool below.**_

_**The next song came on and he spun me around so that my backside was once again pressed to the front of him. I tilted my head back against his chest. **_

_**KISSES DOWN LOW**_

**_BY: KELLY ROWLAND_**

**_..._I like my kisses down low**  
**Makes me arch my back**  
**When you give it to me slow**  
**Baby just like that …**

**… Yeah, baby get a little rough that's okay**  
**Baby go ahead do your thang, ride on away**  
**And I love it when we misbehave**  
**Me and you together babe, we can do everything**  
**Boy, if somebody could see the way you kiss on me**  
**Oh they won't believe it, cause even I don't believe it but I love the way I'm feeling**

_**I felt Patch's lips moving softly along the column of my neck where he swept my curls away. The slow burning fire was quickly turning into a blaze as his lips stoked the fire every place they touched. Any hopes of common sense or danger were obliterated to ash when he nipped my earlobe gently before soothing it with his tongue. I moaned softly, arching into him. What was he doing to me? Never mind, I didn't even care, I just never wanted it to stop. His hands gripped me a little rougher, when I turned my head his lips crashed into mine. They were firm, but soft, rough but gentle. They were passionate and tender all at once. He tasted so different from Scott, so completely Patch. No words could ever encompass a guy like him and no words could describe his taste. He smelled of mint, earth, leather and spice. **_

_**The notes drifted away and new ones started. **_

**_MOTIVATION_**

**_BY: KELLY ROWLAND FT LIL WAYNE_**

**… I just wanna feel your hands all over me, baby**  
**but you can't stop there, music still playing in the background**  
**And you're almost there**  
**You can do it, I believe in you, baby**  
**So close from here**

**Baby I'ma be your motivation**  
**Go, go, go, go**  
**Motivation**  
**Go, go, go, go**

_**The wildfire went from an inferno to a volcano when his hands glided up and down my sides, tracing his fingers along each of my ribs, down to my hips where he pulled me roughly back into him so that there was no escaping the impact the music and our movements were having on him. I was coming undone again, only this time we were both wide awake. **_

"_**Wanna get out of here?" I heard him say in a low, husky voice.**_

_**Oh God yes did I ever. "Yes." My voice was more breath than sound.**_

_**He grabbed my hand and after speaking a few words in Rixon's ear that I could only gather was to let him know we were taking off and Vee was in his care before we were headed out the door. **_

_**He still had a hold on my hand and his keys were in the other. Patch quickly unlocked the door, but before he opened it to let me in he shoved me gently so my back was pressed against the shiny black jeep. His arms effectively caging me in so similar to what he had done on New Years before everything had turned so...awkward. This time, this time there was no blonde, no Scott, no hidden fantasies and dreams. There was only us, our lust, our desire. He captured my lips in another heated kiss as my fingers wound themselves around his neck raking through his hair, tugging him closer so my lips could devour his. It felt so good. So right. Red flares warning of danger should have gone off, but all I felt was thirst and Patch was the water in my desert oasis. I **__needed __**him. All fear of my first time had evaporated with the heat he was bathing me in. **_

_**I pulled back to catch my breath. The moon cast an eery glow over his face, lighting it just enough for me to see his dark eyes black with desire. Desire for me.**_

_**Patch opened the door, waiting for me to slide in and fasten up before closing it and climbing in the driver's seat. Without a word he turned it on and backed out, heading to his house in silence, each of us lost in thought, or better, lack of thought.**_

_**When we pulled into his garage he was out and at my door before I could blink. He held his hand out to help me out of the jeep, then used it to pull me in to him. **_

"_**You're gray eyes have always been surprisingly irresistible, and that killer curvy mouth of yours has begged for me to kiss it." Patch's voice was gravely.**_

_**Without warning, I flung myself into his arms. He pressed me back against the wall with the force of his kiss. A shudder of relief rippled through both of us, and I sank my fingers into his shirt, dragging him against me, needing him close in a way I never had before. His mouth pressed and tasted mine. There was nothing expert about the way he was kissing me now; in the cool darkness of the garage, hot urgency bound us together. I kissed him, frantic and bold, my mouth crushing forcefully to his. I pressed deeper, drowning in his taste. His hands tightened around my back, pulling me closer. I shaped my palms to his shoulders, to his arms, to his thighs, feeling his muscles work, so real and strong, alive with power and energy. His mouth ground against mine, bright with needy pressure.**_

_**When I found myself in need of air again he laid assault on my neck, kissing down to my collar-bone, nibbling just above it before biting into my shoulder with a low growl that had me shivering in a way far from being cold. I whimpered in response and hooked my right leg around his, using it to pull his lower body into mine. He responded by sliding his hands down, cupping my ass and lifting me to wrap my legs around his waist.**_

"_**Please..." I moaned. "Please." He knew what I wanted, I didn't fully understand, but I knew that I was a wet and trembling mess and he was the cure. I was more than ready for him. **_

_**He closed his eyes and seemed to inhale like he was capturing my scent. I used my tongue to play with his earlobe, slowly tracing the contour of it."Please." I whispered, and I felt his body shiver at my words.**_

_**With my legs wrapped around him I ground into him. Just like he had in my bed a month ago he pushed back into me. It was like a ball of fire was circulating inside of my body.**_

"_**You're so perfect...so perfect, Angel." He mumbled softly, making me smile, even as a whimper escaped me. **_

_**My nails were digging into his shoulders, I couldn't stop; it was like I had no control over my body. Our hands were making hasty work of learning each others topography. We were everywhere on each other touching and teasing. I could feel his prominent erection straining against the confines of his jeans, pulsing against me with need. His hands had untied the knot on my blouse and was sliding along the sensitive skin of my stomach and chest as they sought out my breasts that were heaving against his chest. The thumb on his right hand brushed against my hardened nipple making me cry out...then his cell phone rang and our world shattered...**_

_**Patch's parents had just been killed in a head on collision when a drunk driver had crossed the medium when they were on their way back to their hotel. **_

_**The high we had been riding screeched to a halt as time stopped. Somewhere in the distance I heard screaming...**_


	11. Chapter 11 - GRIEF

**I'm working on trying to get these lines spaced, font size, paragraph breaks to read better. My original doc is double spaced with large print ect, that's not how it's turning out. I'm working on it though for you, please be patient while I learn the ropes :) Thank-you!**

****If you were a little upset by the end of the last chapter or this one rest assured things are not over for these two, I'm a sucker for a happy ending. :D**

* * *

**CHAPTER 11**

**GRIEF**

_**PATCH**_

**I don't remember much from the night I was told my parents were killed. I know that I had been on the verge of making a life altering change with Nora when reality hit me with a different kind of life altering impact.**

**I remember thinking it couldn't be real, don't all people in my situation think that? I remember feeling like I was being split into two people at the same time; one would take care of Nora who was screaming and crying at my feet. She needed me strong, I needed to be strong for her. My parents, **_**our **_**would expect that of me. I think I knelt next to her on the cold damp concrete floor of my garage, I think I did because honestly, I might have just collapsed there. I do know that she ended up back in my arms, maybe she flew into them again like she had earlier, before the nightmare began only with an entirely different need. Or I might have pulled her to me, clinging to her in the hope that none of this was real, that she was real, not this, not the voice on the other end of the phone telling me that two hours after my birthday had officially ended (they were pronounced dead at 2:21 am) my parents were stolen from me, robbed of their lives together, of watching Nora and I get a grip on whatever the hell we were thinking when we almost had sex while they tried to guide us in a way that wouldn't leave our friendship in ruins, watching Nora and I graduate from high-school, watching me almost screw up my chance at college with my reckless behavior that would likely involve Scott or some other idiot foolish enough to break Nora's heart, them dropping us off at our first day of college, visits for the holidays, marriage- her's not mine, grandchildren-her kids not mine, the list went on. All of that gone. Gone in an instant were their lives, but I knew even in that fractured moment that unlike them, the grief would never be gone. When that wretched guy decided he was okay to still drive after a night of drinking he might as well have chained me in hell while he was at it. I cursed him for drinking, something I had done that night -the irony didn't miss me, I cursed him for driving, I cursed his car for starting, I cursed his friends for letting him leave behind the wheel like that, I cursed the bartender for serving him and not cutting him off or at least calling him a cab. **_**Protect Nora, keep Nora safe, protect Nora, keep Nora safe... **_**I started repeating the mantra in my head, rocking her back and forth in my arms pressed firmly to me as I stroked her long hair. This wasn't how this night was supposed to end, we should be doing what teenagers do best, what **_**I **_**do best, make irrational hasty decisions that teach us to not make hasty irrational decisions from the school of hard knocks. We should be in my bed, surrounded by the comfort of my room, feeling the silk sheets slide against our skin, not here on this dirty floor in the eery dim glow of a single light bulb hung outside the door leading into our house.**

**The other part of me heard the air whoosh around me and sounds blend until I couldn't make out the voice on the phone from Nora's voice, or even mine for that matter. The room was spinning, then tilting, then ****falling away before the floor swallowed me up. Nothing made sense, time, space, reality, I couldn't get a handle on any of it. Sounds would hit me suddenly then fade away, crying? Screaming? Yelling? Sobbing? Panic? Anger? It all became one and yet separate. I couldn't think, I wanted to throw things, hit things, kick things, I wanted to yell until my voice gave away and I wanted to run, more than anything I wanted to run, run from all of it, run from the sounds, the feelings, the news...run from the reality the stranger's voice on the other end of my cell was trying to convince me was true. I felt torn, torn in every direction at once. What do I do now?**

**A few summers back I had been in our backyard with my parents helping them pull weeds in one of my mom's countless flower beds as we visited. I didn't get as much time as I wanted with them so these times were special. I was taking advantage of it by asking them about their jobs, both worked in fields they loved, but both required dealing with massive amounts of stress and pressure and rapid responses that held other people's lives at stake: my dad through his legal representation, if he didn't get it right people could lose their lives by losing their jobs, houses, cars, family's. My mom had to make split second decisions that could literally cost someone their lives. I asked them in those seconds that everything was riding on them knowing what to do how they handled it, how they kept sane instead of losing their mind. They looked at me and smiled, "good question" they had said, you find one thing to grasp, one thing that's real and you cling to that and you don't let it go. My mom said for her an example would be someone coming in with a gunshot wound, monitors are going off, blood pressure is unstable, heart rate is eradic, their bleeding, people are running everywhere shouting directions, she said in that split second she looks for the one thing that makes the most sense, the one thing that will make or break whatever happens, she'd stop the bleeding and deal with the rest later. She practiced blocking out her surroundings just enough to focus on the most important thing, stop the bleeding-save the life.**

**So that's what I did. I stopped my bleeding, covering the hole in my chest with a bandage so I could take care of Nora. **_**Protect Nora, keep Nora safe...**_**The problem with bandages... eventually they soak through and need to be changed so injury's can heal and scars form where the open wounds once were. If you don't change the bandages infection spreads through every part of your body/life until you take care of them or it kills you...**

**I don't know how or when but at some point I stood up on shaky legs and helped Nora to her feet before guiding our stumbling limbs up the two steps, into the house, across the house, down the hall, and through my door before we numbly fell in an exhausted heap of misery on my bed. All thoughts and desires before that call...vanished.**

**It was always quieter in my room than the rest of the house. Now more than ever it sounds like an echo chamber that mimicked every whimper of sound that came from movements, eerie objects, my breaths, my heartbeats. Everything seems to come together in unison like a symphony of noises that run through my mind like the lessons I should be learning instead of sitting here contemplating the sounds of silence. Three months have passed since the accident, and I still don't know how to heal. It's not a physical injury I can see, stitch, put antibiotic ointment on so it doesn't fester before putting a bandage on it that will fix me good as new. No, this is emotional and there isn't a bandage big enough or strong enough to mend what's broken inside of me. I still can't come to terms with the events of that night. Day by day, night by night, the fuzz surrounding the moments leading up to it cloud my every last thought. Was this karma? Had I somehow caused this by my stupidity and reckless behavior? Was this God's way of punishing me for thinking things about Nora that I shouldn't have been, hell, **_**doing **_**things with Nora I had no right to do. The pain lingers in me, but there is no one home to comfort me.**

_**They're dead. Both are dead. My mom, my dad, gone, never coming back.**_

**That's what I have to remind myself every time I call for my mom when I wake up screaming at night. Ironic since I was the one who had covered nightmare duty for Nora since we were tiny kids. Whenever I make myself meals, I ask my parents if they want something, knowing I'll never have the satisfaction of a reply ever again. Now it's just me, sixteen years old, old enough to own the house that still holds the smells of my family. My grandparents showed up at the funeral services but they had no intentions of sticking around. They refused to live in or have any part in a house where their children had once lived, laughed and loved. They wanted no part in the only child that reminded them of their loss every time they saw him. I don't even know how or why I'm still living in this house. Perhaps some sick twisted apprehension is keeping me here, maybe it's my way of punishing myself for still being here to make mistakes when they're not. Truthfully though, it's both with a large sum of feeling responsible for the girl next door. I had to know that when my parents weren't okay, that I wasn't okay, that Nora was.**

**I had other opportunities in other cities and states. I even had the once in a lifetime opportunity to live in a orphanage in downtown Los Angelo's. How could I refuse such a promised life in the foster system? It was hard. No, I remained in my house where the memories pang me. The pictures on the wall stare at me with their silent words that send shivers up and down my spine.**

**I remember people stopping by to check on me to begin with, people my parents worked with. Their faces wore masks of sympathy, their voices dripped heavy in pity, pity I didn't want or need. The murmurs of their voices plagued me as I tossed and turned in my bed questioning what was real and what was fake. On the nights I wasn't plagued I was void of emotion wondering if perhaps it had never happened. I just don't know anymore.**

**I'd like to believe that day-and every other since was simply a recurring nightmare. I'd just wake up and everything would be fine. I'd wake up at 7:33 on the dot. The smell of mom and dad's cooking filling my nose with the pleasant anticipation that had my mouth-watering. I'd bicker with my dad over who got the last sausage link as he opened the freshly thrown newspaper, laughing almost instantaneously at the stupid criminals in the community crime section that he would never have to try to defend. I remember one morning when he read a report to us about a guy who drove his truck into an adult store to steal a blow up doll, they had it on camera and he had taken his time going through the boxes looking for the exact one he wanted. We had almost been in tears we were laughing so hard. We'd clear our plates from the table and make an assembly line at the kitchen counter as we each made our lunch for the day, take two slices of bread, pass the loaf on and down the line of ingredients until all three of us finished, then I'd grab my books, they'd grab their stuff for work and we'd hug, say our good-bye's and I love you's for the day. I'd be happy.**

**Instead, I wake up to the suddenly mostly colorless world I live in. The glumly gray mist that seemed to have taken residence in my house cast an eery glow around my room that my mom had helped me decorate with chromatic shades of navy, gray and black, my three favorite colors. My furniture was sparse and we had chosen the pieces I had because they were sleek and contemporary, with clean lines I liked and artistic appeal my mom loved. Now it just made the room seem even more vacant. The fog that had taken up ownership in my head now filled my home as well with every sight that greeted me. Everything had been flushed of every tint and tinge. An abundance of melancholy grays and blues that would only linger to remind me it was all real. No smell but the crisp, almost sour, smells of the winters running heater. No noises only the loudness of more silence.**

**Someone had given me a pamphlet about grief and the stages of it that supposedly mapped out how my emotions should work. It was okay to be angry they all tried to reassure me. Under the safety of the mask I had perfected long before I needed it I cursed in disagreement with how they thought grief worked. I figured I'd be sad for months, maybe years, then I'd wake up one day and just be happy. At least that's how I hope it works. I don't want anything to do with "stages" dictating how my emotions will play out. I know that how I hoped things would work out and how they will are not realistic or in-line with each other. But that's what I hope for and now, hope was pretty much all I had besides Nora, and sometimes I only had Nora.**

**Six months have passed since life ended for me. I'd like to say that I'm doing a little better day by day, truth is, I'm not. I'd like to say that I'm doing what I should, taking care of Nora, but I'm not.**

**Most days I don't make it to school, the days I do the school wishes I didn't. When you've got nothing you've got nothing to lose. I do what I want when I want. I've always had a reputation for trouble, for fighting, hence the name Patch, my real name is Jev. No one calls me Jev. The annoying group of followers I had before my parents death have all disappeared. Kids still clear the way for me when I walk down the hall, but now it's with eyes averted looking anywhere but at me with fear of being hit if they look at me wrong or say something wrong to piss me off. They have a right to avoid me, hell, I'd avoid me if I could. I really just don't give a fuck anymore. It's ironic, alcohol basically killed my parents so how do I cope? I drink. When I drink I do stupid things, things like breaking and entering, vandalizing. One night I threw red paint all over the halls of the school, another night I took my jeep and tore up the football field. I stole all the team uniforms right before a big game and I woke up in more strange women's bed then I probably woke in my own. I didn't care that many were older or just using me for sex, I wasn't looking for love, love hurt, when you love somebody you could lose them, it was safer not to love. Anything to avoid my house. It was just a house now, not a home, I doubt it will ever be a home again since a home imply's a family lives there. My arrest record was adding up and my chances of college were quickly slipping away. Any hopes my parents might have had for me were evaporating faster than dew on a hot summers morning.**

**Nora was trying her hardest to be there for me, but I could see the pain and grief on her face and in her eyes. I wanted to make it go away, I wanted to make her feel better but I couldn't even make mine go away let alone hers. She'd sneak out like she always had and on the nights I was in my bed I'd feel her crawl under my blankets and curl up next to me, both of us crying silent tears until she fell to sleep in my arms. She'd be gone before I woke. Nora never mentioned the tears I shed, never made me feel like less a man because of them.**

**When I didn't show up for school she'd come straight to my house, make me something to eat and drag my ass out of bed insisting I shower. I had promised to always care for her, to protect her and I had failed her, failed my parents.**

**I came home tonight ready to collapse in my normal alcohol induced haze when I noticed the door on my parents bedroom was open. Anger coursed through me, if anyone had dared violate their sanctuary I would kill them, literally. I crept down the hall, no need for a weapon I had enough experience to be deadly on my own, pushed the door open and...my heart caught in my throat. Nora was curled up on my parents bed with their wedding album and our vacation albums open around her, she had a couple of the shoe-boxes of letters my mom and dad had saved that they had written to each other before and after they married. They'd saved them all, everything from their first love letters to a yellow sticky that simply said 'I love you today and everyday' that my dad had left on my mom's rear-view mirror of her car the day before they were killed. Then I spotted something I had never seen before, something I didn't recognize as theirs. It was a small leather book laid open like the others with a pen laying nearby it. Nora's hand was loosely laying over it so I carefully moved her arm and took a peak at what it was.**

_Dear Mom and Dad,_

_He's out again tonight, I'm trying to take care of him for you, but I'm not doing a very good job of it. Taking care of someone is a lot harder than you guys made it look. I miss you both so much and I know he does too, he just doesn't know how to deal with it. _

_Sometimes I feel you are both everywhere I look and no where at all. I know that doesn't really make sense, but it's how I feel. I see you in every item and every color in this house, I see you in Patch and then suddenly the void comes that you left and swallows me. I think that's how he must feel too. He's gone so much now I think he wants to escape the house he's afraid to leave. I'm here almost every night, Patch doesn't know that, I just wait for him. I used to spend the night here all the time with him when I needed to escape my home, now it's him escaping his. I try to stay at my house but I can't sleep unless I know he's safe so I sit on my window seat waiting to see the lights come on to know he made it home, most nights he doesn't and I worry myself sick, if anything happens to him...When he does come home I'm so relieved, but sleep still doesn't find me. I need to see him, feel him, know that it's real, that he's okay when your not so I find myself walking that worn path between my house and yours, slipping through his window when I could just use the door now, and crawling under the covers so I can feel the solidity that is Patch, the security that was there before this emptiness took over. _

_Do you know he cries? I know, it's hard to believe. The first few times it happened I thought it was just my tears sliding down my face and my body shaking against his, now I know that it's not just me. We both miss you so much. I don't know what to do, he's ruining his life, throwing away everything and I can't be mad at him for that because I understand, I do. I try to be strong for him, I'm not though. I'm not helping him at all, sometimes I think I make it worse. _

_I was looking at your pictures and letters again tonight, you guys loved each other so so much. I always thought I'd have a love like yours, now I know that love isn't always enough. It doesn't keep the people you love close to you, they still die or leave or simply just fade away. Losing my mom is different from losing you guys, I never knew her, I miss her in theory but I knew you guys, I know everything I'm missing and everything Patch is missing too. I just want you to come back, come home, come take care of him because as selfish as it is I need him to take care of me..._

**I couldn't read anymore, it wasn't just me who had lost them, it wasn't just me who was in pain and grieving. I had wallowed in my loneliness so much that I didn't even notice that she hadn't just lost them...in my grief, she'd lost me as well.**

**I slid the journal back under her hand where it had been, pulled a blanket over her and shut off the light before retreating to my room to think.**

…**...**

* * *

_**NORA**_

**I woke up today with the sun shining into my eyes. My eyes were still scratchy and swollen from crying the night before, making them even more sensitive to the bright light. It took me a few moments to orient my thoughts enough to realize where I was. I must have fallen asleep in Patch's parents room. I hope if he came home that he wasn't too mad at me for trespassing in here. We didn't go in this room anymore, it sort of felt like holy ground. Sometimes when I'm here alone though I feel safer in here, it doesn't feel quite so lonely as the rest of this big house. This room has held more love than a Valentines Day card...Valentines Day...I feel the tale-tell pricking of tears start to burn the corners of my eyes all over again at the thought. Six months, it had only been six months and yet somehow it felt like an eternity. One moment I was caught up in teenage drama, fighting with my ex boyfriend, celebrating with my best friend, partying with my closest friends, dancing, almost sleeping with my best friend...I shook my head, best to not even think about that part, and then the nightmare had begun. Two more minutes, two more and Patch and I would have had a whole other situation we'd be dealing with, but that would've been far better than what we were going through now.**

**That night when the police had called to tell Patch his parents were dead, **_**our **_**parents were dead they were the only 'real' parents I'd ever had, the guys voice had been so loud I'd heard it the same second Patch did. One minute I was in his arms, ankles locked around his waist and the next I was in a heap on the floor. I think I must have passed out for a couple of minutes, I woke to yelling and crying. Eventually I figured out it was Patch that was yelling and me that was crying. All I could think and he was saying was one syllable...no. No, no, no, no, no, no this can't be happening, no this isn't real, just...NO, no I don't accept it, if I don't accept it it can't be real. I remember feeling like I couldn't breathe I was gasping uncontrollably, that must have broke through all the things going on in Patch's private hell because he nearly crushed me to his chest, pressing my cheek against his heart as he rocked me back and forth, stroking my hair. I couldn't concentrate on breathing so I concentrated on the only thing I could, the only thing that made sense. His heartbeat. If I could hear his heartbeat he was safe, if he was safe I was safe. **_Thump thump thump thump..._

**The next day was a blur of people in and out of Patch's home, the police, neighbors, his parents co-workers. Over and over people would say they were sorry, give their condolences, but let's be honest, all the pity in the world wasn't going to bring our parents back and they were only saying what they felt they had to, going through the movements that society taught them was 'the right thing to do'. What were they sorry for? It wasn't their fault, did they serve that idiot alcohol? Did they put the keys in his hand, let him walk out the door and get behind the wheel? Did they cause him to lose control, cross the divide and obliterated Patch's parents car? Or were they apologizing knowing that he'd never see or hear from them again? That after a week I guess your time is up and you're forgotten about because as soon as the last shovel of dirt was on their caskets people split from our lives.**

**Hank, my so-called dad, made his obligatory appearance at the service, it's important to give the impression you care, other than that the only thing he said to me is, "Are you going to cry all day? I can't have you falling apart when I have company coming over." Marcy and her mom let me know that even though his parents weren't there anymore they didn't want me moping around 'their' house so I should just go there where there was no one to bother. So I did, I spent most my time here in this house haunted with memories, or at Vee's when her mom would let me stay there.**

**There was a lot of confusion over what Patch's parents had left behind, namely him and a wealth of money and property. The confusion part being what to do with Patch. No one wanted him, he was too painful a reminder of their loss, as if looking in the mirror wasn't a painful reminder to him of HIS loss. He had his mom's midnight raven hair and his dad's eyes that took in everything and gave nothing away, which incidentally, was very helpful when you were in court and needing to not give anything away. He had his dad's Italian skin and his mom's soft curls that would show when his hair was a little longer at the base of his neck. His facial structure was a sculptors dream, much like mom's and his body was strong, lean, tall and had muscle that almost rippled with power that you could feel in the air around him just like his dad. In the end he was emancipated and given everything, even the opportunity to live in an orphanage clear across the country in a poverty-stricken area of Los Angelo's, California. I was so relieved when his emancipation papers came in that day and he didn't have to leave.**

**Of course all of this changed Patch, how could it not? It changed me too. We had a sweet deal going: Patch's dad took care of his mom, his mom took care of his dad, they both took care of Patch together (and me), and then Patch took care of me. It worked for everyone and it never occurred to me that it could ever be different. I was living the normal teenage life with just a little taste of tragedy, you know, dad cheats knocks up mistress mom loses her mind dad blames you dad beats you you run to your best friend who comforts and protects you from all bad things...I thought that sucked at the time, it's nothing compared to this.**

**Patch got in trouble growing up...a lot, but he never got in trouble like this. He beat a kid within an inch of his life for saying that it must be nice to lose your parents and be left alone with all that money to blow and do whatever you want. Then he spray painted WHORE on Marcie's Toyota four runner...okay, THAT was funny. A week later he Saran wrapped the principles car which apparently wasn't enough to torture him because two weeks later he painted the floors of the high-school and parts of the walls with gallons of paint that he threw everywhere randomly. He was even arrested for stealing a car when he was drunk of all things. I worry non-stop about him. I can talk to Vee, I know I can and she listens to me like she always has, but there are things I can't tell her, things I can't talk to her about because they involve Patch and while she feels bad for him she doesn't understand, they're two different types of people.**

**For a months before that awful call my biggest worry was how to be around my best friend and not want to do unmentionable things to him, now my biggest concern with being around him is getting him to eat and clean up. He's lost a bunch of weight, he often has a five o'clock shadow, bags under his eyes making him look as vacant as we both feel and his eyes and mouth are tight. He pinches the bridge of his nose a lot like he does when he's upset and fighting a headache and his jaw clenches so often I'm beginning to wonder if it's a tick and if he's going to break his teeth off someday. He's so different I almost don't recognize him anymore. The boy who was always there for me has vanished and I am left alone in a way I'd never thought I'd be.**

**The loneliness was so consuming I had to find an outlet or I'd be losing my mind like my mom and find myself contemplating suicide and that just wasn't me. I got scared sometimes and had times of self-doubt and general lack of confidence but I wasn't a quitter. I'm not judging anyone, people do what they think they need to do and it isn't my place to judge them, but for me it wasn't an answer. I needed someone to talk to that I could trust, someone who loved me and accepted me, someone I could spill my guts to, every hope every dream, every fear, every anger, every tear...Patch's parents. That's how the letters had begun. I told them how Patch was doing, what he was up to, what I was up to, what I was worried about, the things I missed and the things they were missing. I poured everything into my little purple journal. I didn't care about what 'stages' people thought I'd go through or how I should grieve or even if I should since they weren't 'my' parents, something Marcie and a her friends agreed with and voiced vocally to anyone and everyone, especially in my presence. I couldn't talk to Patch, couldn't expect him to deal with my grief and his too so I vented to them.**

**I pulled myself slowly up to lean against the headboard, it was black lacquer like the rest of the furniture in the room. It had a fancy design that's centerpiece was a red rose with an almost Oriental look to it. The bed was huge with a custom fit mattress that was like sleeping on air and the red silk sheets reminded me of Patch's bed, they even had the same black comforter that was somehow thick and fluffy like the highest grade down comforter only it was encased in the finest of silks. They had throw pillows in different shapes and sizes like Vee had, but theirs were in the matching red and black. On his mom's chest dresser sat a red glass vase on each side of the mirror, silver picture frames with her favorite pictures of her and Patch's dad throughout the years. She had a black jewelry box that he had given her that played 'You Light Up My Life' when you opened it that was heart-shaped with a rose design similar to the headboard and sides of the dresser. I had often wondered if it hadn't been handmade for him to give to her, I had never gotten around to asking. Now it was too late. On the walls hung black and white images of couples in love, caught kissing or hugging or just curled up with each other. They were adult, but not pornographic. If I was asked to give a one word description of what the room looked like or felt like it would be LOVE. The room was rich with romance and passion, for each other, for life. The rest of the house was a testament of their love as a family, their love for Patch, even their love for me with the photo's, keepsakes and memorabilia that they'd/we'd collected and displayed, that's a large part of why the rest of the house felt so empty, so sad, it had reminders everywhere of what was now missing.**

**I put everything back that I had dug out the night before into their proper places making sure to leave things exactly as they were the last time his parents were in here. I gathered my book and pen, reached for the light switch to shut off the light, I always fell asleep before I remembered to flip the switch, only this time it was already off. Patch. He must have caught me in here which was how I ended up covered with a blanket I didn't remember having. It hurt me to think about him finding me in there. I had so many thoughts, feelings, emotions in that room that I couldn't imagine what he felt like being in there. Would he be mad at me for going through their things, pulling out the photo albums and their letters? He was always unpredictable, but now, now he was a whole new level of unpredictable. I sighed and shut the door softly behind me. I guess I'd find out soon enough.**

**Had I known what was coming next I would have stayed in that bed, hid my head under the blankets and never came back out. Just when I thought life couldn't get much worse...it did. Sometimes things have to get worse before they get better, at least I hope that's true.**


	12. Chapter 12 - LEARNING HOW TO FEEL AGAIN

_**CHAPTER 12**_

_**LEARNING HOW TO FEEL AGAIN**_

_**PATCH**_

**I spent the night deciding what I should do. I couldn't take care of Nora if I couldn't take care of myself and the road I was on was leading me to jail, prison, and or rehab. That wouldn't provide a life for either of us, at least not the life my parents would want for us. Seeing Nora like that... I knew she was hurting as much as I was from our parents death, I hadn't wanted to face that she was hurting because of me too. I didn't want to feel, feeling hurt so I was numbing everything out. It wasn't that I had a drinking problem, not yet anyhow, I could go without drinking and never give a thought to it, I could be around it and never think once about having it. It was only there when nothing else was working and I felt like I needed it. I needed a way to feel again, not just my grief or what I felt for Nora, I needed to start feeling again period. The only person I can think to talk to that didn't act like they pity me or wanted to throw me in a mental hospital or worse was the officer who told me about my parents and the one who surprisingly has been taking the time out of his off duty hours to talk to me when I get in trouble or to call and check up on me. He's the only one who does that, checks on Nora and I. It's easy to remember his name because he has the same last name as Nora, it's Grey. Officer Harrison Grey. It's weird, as soon as he asked Nora's information that night he stared at her for a long time like he was searching her for something, I don't know what it could have been, it's all so hazy. I would have confronted him about it any other time, but it doesn't seem that important in the grand scheme of things and he's been nothing but supportive and understanding, even when I screw up BIG time. He's even testified on my behalf at my appearance in court for theft. Maybe he'll have some advice. **

**I'm going to make Nora breakfast, she's lost a considerable amount of weight like I have, and then I'll go speak with Officer Grey. Nora prefers to eat organic food so I make a run to the store to grab a few things, the house is pretty bare in the kitchen since I rarely feel like eating anymore. I guess I've neglected Nora that way too. She always came here to eat, with no money really of her own and my house not being stocked I'd bet she's not eating anymore than me. That thought makes me feel worse yet.**

**Breakfast was a quiet affair. Without my parents here to tease us and laugh with us it just seems so...depressing. I could tell Nora wanted to hang out with me today since it's the weekend, but I really need to go to the station since I happen to know he's on shift this afternoon. I don't want to tell Nora where I'm going unless she asks me directly. I won't lie to her, but until I have some answers or something I'd rather not go there. **

**I wanted to ask her what she was looking at the wedding album and love notes for. I mean, I know that girls have that hearts and flowers romantic stuff going on in their heads all the time, but I didn't think that was what that was all about. Nora wanted to go to college, marry, have a family, have grand kids, two rocking chairs... She'd never been the real mushy type though. I don't recall her ever having a lot of heart to hearts with my mom about that stuff at least, and I've never known her to sit and watch love-a-thons...that's what I call it when girls sit on the couch with a box of Kleenex, a blanket with ice cream and junk food to watch hour after hour of drama about who did who wrong or who fell in love with who and they die or something else tragic happens. I don't know what's worse, those are the 'fairy-tale' ending ones. Look girls, hate to break it to you, but he's not Prince Charming, no guy is that perfect and if he wants you to believe that he's a lying sack of shit, plus, if he was Prince Charming hate to be the bearer of bad news, but odds are he's not falling in love with anyone here in Coldwater Creek. I think that Nora knows better than to believe in that stuff, real love takes work from both people every second of everyday. You have to love them in the moments you hate them and that's not easy. Many try, most fail. You either travel side by side down the highway of life, helping each other maneuver through the obstacles and whether breakdowns and repairs together or your headed in opposite directions on the same road and there's going to come a time when you collide head on and it won't be pretty. I prefer to avoid head on collisions now, especially since one killed my parents, so I plan to travel the highway solo. Yep, that's me, riding solo... Nora is a passenger, my road trip buddy, no worry of a head on with her next to me in the passenger's seat. We can both admire the scenery out our windows and have each other for companionship. **

**We never did talk about what happened New Years, or about what we were doing when we got the call that ended life as we knew it. Temporary insanity for both of us I guess. I haven't been plagued by any more dreams. Of course I don't sleep so an ounce of prevention, right? Let's face it, Nora is a pretty girl, beautiful even so what guy wouldn't think of her that way at least once...or more... Could you blame me? She was just caught up in the moment with me, it wasn't really about **_me_** and had we not been away from each other for a month and the music being more than suggestive sex songs, along with it being Valentines Day and my birthday, well, the cards were stacked against us when you threw in teenage hormones, plus, I'm a hot guy, I would want me if I was her. I haven't met a girl yet that could resist me, hell, I've had to beat a few asses when some guy get's it stuck in his head that if I'd try gay there'd be no other way. I take no issue with their choices, but it's NOT mine. I like my happy meals to have killer legs and curvaceous lips to devour. Right now though, not even sex was distracting me.**

"**Hello, I'm here to see Officer Grey." I told the lady at the police station counter. **

"**Is he expecting you Mr...?"**

"**Cipriano, Patch Cipriano, and yes he is I called and spoke with him earlier." The little red-head with the bouncing curls nodded before shuffling off to let him know I had arrived.**

**I hated police stations, nothing good happens for the people in them. You're either there because you got in trouble and you got caught, or you're the victim of somebody else bad decision. It wasn't the kind of place you went to sit and relax or visit. Appointments here weren't happy occasions so I hoped this didn't turn out to be a mistake. I was out of options, there really wasn't anyone else to turn to.**

"**Mr. Grey will see you now. Down the hall, take a left and it's your first door on the right." She gave me a curt smile, probably trying to guess if I was here because I was a troublemaker, I more than looked the part, hell, I'd been playing the part, or if I was the victim. I was both.**

"**Mr. Cipriano! Good to see you son, how have you been?" Officer Grey was a tall man, broad shoulders and a muscular build. He was fit, with bright gray-blue eyes that could go from warm and kind to hard as ice in two seconds flat. His voice was as firm as his handshake, unwavering. He was a man who took a direct approach, no beating around the bush and I respected that. He didn't coddle me. His hair was reddish-brown, similar to Nora's though hers had more red in it then his, his was starting to turn gray on the sides I thought. It was hard to tell because he kept it very short, a little longer on the top and short on the sides. The gray was giving him a distinguished look, it fit with the wisdom he spoke with when we would talk.**

"**I need some help." He looked at me as if to say 'what did you get yourself into this time', but instead he leaned back in his chair studying me for a second.**

"**Go on." He said when I didn't elaborate.**

"**I'm not doing well coping with losing my parents. I'm screwing up my life, you already know that. The thing is, I know my parents would expect me to take care of my friend, Nora, the girl you met that lives next door to me." I stopped for a moment to collect my thoughts so I could put into words what it was I was needing from him.**

"**How is Nora?" I looked up from where I had been picking invisible lint off my baseball cap. **

"**Nora is not doing so good either." I sighed.**

"**You've lost some more weight. Is she losing weight like you are?" His voice was serious and his face was etched with more concern than I had anticipated.**

"**I'm ashamed to say I hadn't noticed how much she'd lost until this morning, sir." I squirmed a little at the having to admit that. **

"**She's not making herself throw up is she?"**

"**No, Nora isn't that way."**

"**So, she's able to keep food down she's just lost her appetite?" He questioned.**

"**I think she's keeping her food down, I haven't asked. She's never been a big eater and she's always ate most of her meal at my..."**

"**Why did she eat her meals at your house instead of her own?" Okay, what's with the twenty questions about Nora?**

"**She isn't really welcome in her home, she's kind of the black-sheep of the family."**

"**Is she a trouble maker? I didn't see any records on her or complaints."**

"**No, no it's not like that at all. It's.."**

"**It's what?" He leaned forward. I might as well tell him, he'd find out anyways it's part of his job, investigating people.**

"**She's an unwanted child. Her mom isn't in the picture, her dad remarried and has a girl with her that's a few months younger..."**

"**A few months?!" His eyebrows shot up.**

"**Yes a few months younger than Nora, her name is Marcie, Marcie Miller."**

"**Nora's last name is Grey though, why is Marcie's last name Miller if they're sisters from the same father?" This is not what I had expected to talk about, but maybe once these questions were out-of-the-way we could move on to what I was here for. I pinched the bridge of my nose to stave off the headache threatening to build there I answered.**

"**I don't know why her mom gave her that last name. Her dad wasn't there for the delivery, she filled out the information and that's the last name she put on her birth certificate." I really didn't know why Nora had a different last name, I don't think my parents every had the answer for that either. We sure as hell couldn't ask Hank and we knew for sure she was his, she had paternity testing done automatically at birth because of where she was born and under the circumstances. They couldn't just release her to a man claiming to be her father without being sure. I wished he hadn't turned out to be the father.**

"**Where's her mom at now?" **

"**She's in the long-term in-patient psychiatric state hospital a few hours from here. She's been in there since before Nora was born. She kinda lost her marbles when she found out Nora's dad cheated on..."**

"**He cheated on Blythe?!" He burst out. "Can't say I'm all that surprised.." He mumbled somewhat to himself looking lost in thought.**

"**Wait. I didn't tell you Nora's mother's name." I narrowed my eyes at him.**

"**No, I... it was in her file." Hmm...possible sure, did I believe him? No.**

"**I doubt that, you..." He cut me off.**

"**How does Hank feel about Nora's last name?" Now it was getting on my nerves. Nora was my best friend and you don't go along spilling all the goods on your best friends. Why was it any of his business? The only people who knew her legal last name was me, her 'family', Rixon, Vee, her doctors, the school and now him. That's it, Hank makes sure of that.**

"**Look, Officer Grey, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but I didn't come here to swap gossip."**

"**I know, I'm just concerned about both of you and I didn't know she'd..." What is he talking about? Something was up, I'd have to find out what, but now I needed to do what I came here to do. "I know you're having a tough go of it, I can't imagine losing my parents at your age and the lack of support you have makes a tough job tougher. Please keep me posted on how you're doing, ****_BOTH _****of you are doing." I nodded.**

"**Are we done talking about Nora so I can get your advice?" I was polite, but let the tone of my voice say I was done talking about Nora, it was time to talk about other things. Plus, in a way she was why I was here.**

"**Yes, I apologize, go ahead please continue. What is it that you needed to see me for?" I spent the next two hours talking to him and waiting for him to make some phone calls before I left with a plan in hand. A plan Nora was going to hate, and I didn't like it any better, but it was a step in the right direction. If I wanted to move forward, be a good person and a good friend than I needed to take care of myself so I could take care of her. This was a start, she'd understand...eventually, right? God, I hope so...**

…**...**

* * *

_**NORA**_

"**You're leaving me?!" I screeched, the glass of milk I had held slipped through my fingers and hit the floor, shattering into tiny pieces as Patch watched.**

"**It's not forever, Nora, I need to do this." He tried to reason with me.**

"**Not forever! How long is 'not forever'?"**

"**I don't know...just not forever. I won't know more until I get there."**

"**So you're just going to up and leave me. I haven't lost enough?" I screamed.**

"**Calm down, Nora, just..."**

"**Calm down? You want me to calm down?! This is all about you, you don't want to live in this house, fine, I get that, but are you fucking kidding me, leaving me here ****_alone?" _****My voice cracked on the last word. I knew I was being selfish, I just couldn't stop.**

"**Nora, come on... I'm not leaving you alone. I'll be back to visit.."**

"**Oh, you'll visit? How kind of you." I snapped. "Don't do me any favors."**

"**Please don't be this way." He said softly.**

"**Be what way, Patch? Don't love you? Don't care? Don't be afraid? Don't be honest about how I feel? I'm going to be by myself! I just lost your parents, ****_our _****parents, and now you expect me to be okay letting you walk out and leave me too? Well I'm NOT okay with that!" Didn't he see how afraid I was? I'd never been without him. Sure I had Vee and she'd take good care of me, but it wasn't the same, not the same at all.**

"**You won't ever be by yourself, Angel, I'll be a phone call away and it's only an eight-hour drive."**

"**I might as well be alone, that's a quarter of a day, Patch. Eight hours are an eternity in my house."**

"**You can come over here and sleep or hang out anytime you want. You have a key, use it it's your house as much as mine."**

"**It's not though, not with you not here." I started to sob.**

"**Nora, I need to get myself together so that I can help you, so that I don't fuck things up to the point I can't fix them."**

"**I know, Patch, I get that, but..." What was I going to do? I felt like I couldn't breathe. What if something happened to him too? I'd never survive losing him, this was already killing me and he hadn't even left yet.**

"**The longer I stay here the harder it's going to be. This is a good opportunity for me to right some of the wrongs I've done lately. I haven't been a good person, Nora, I'm toxic for you right now. Let me do this, let me help others while I'm helping myself so that I can help you."**

"**I miss them so much Patch, it's not fair! It's not fair! If he hadn't driven, if they hadn't left, if..." I was completely breaking down now. If they were still here he wouldn't be leaving, I wouldn't be alone and I would be happy, loved. I wanted that back, I wanted to turn back the clock where my biggest problem was whether to print page twelve of Marcie's diary in the school newspaper or page one hundred and forty. I wanted to to go to bed at night knowing that Patch was a stone throw away if I needed to be held, that if I was hurt he would be there.**

"**I know, come here, Angel." Patch pulled me to him and I buried my head in his shoulder and cried.**

"**I can't lose you too, Patch." **

"**You won't. You're never going to lose me." He stroked my hair.**

"**What if I need you and you're not here?" I started to panic again.**

"**Then you call me and I'll leave, I'll drive non stop to reach you. In the meantime call Officer Grey, the guy who told us about mom and dad."**

"**The one that calls you and went with you to court?"**

"**Yes, call him."**

"**Why him?" I sniffed.**

"**Because he cares. I don't know why, but he REALLY cares, especially about you, Angel." What? Why?**

"**Why? I mean, why me?"**

"**I don't know yet, I plan on finding out, but first I have to do this. Please understand. Maybe going to help children who are in need will help me put my life in perspective."**

"**I'm in need." I whimpered.**

"**You know what I mean."**

"**I guess. I see what you're saying and why you want to do it..."**

"**Nora, I don't ****_want _****to do it, I ****_need _****to do it."**

"**You really don't know how long you'll be gone?" I sniffed.**

"**No." I heard him sigh softly. "Look, I probably won't be back until after the first of the year. I need to get settled there and have some time to get myself back together, then I'll be back for a visit."**

"**But what if I..."**

"**Nothing will keep me from being here if you need me, Angel. Not even the gates of hell could keep me from you if you call."**

"**Will you promise me a few things?" I looked up at him from under my wet eyelashes.**

"**What kind of things?"**

"**For starters, promise me you'll be back for your birthday, for Valentines Day. Please, please don't make me spend it alone." My voice was cracking on each word as I tried not to start bawling all over again.**

"**That's a promise. I don't want to be alone then either so from now on let's make a pact that we will spend it every year from this year forward together as we've always done. We'll make it a commemorative weekend. Just you and me. Deal?"**

"**It's a start." I gave. I had more promises I would be asking, but that one was the most important next to him promising to come back if I needed him to, no questions asked and immediately.**


	13. Chapter 13 - IT ISN'T ALWAYS EASY, BUT I

_**CHAPTER 13**_

_**IT ISN'T ALWAYS EASY, BUT IS IT WORTH IT?**_

_**PATCH**_

**Leaving Nora was the second hardest day of my life so far. I asked Rixon to drive because I knew if I was behind the wheel I'd never leave, I'd turn around and go right back to her. In the end I was right to have asked. I left bright and early in the morning, that was on purpose, if we spent the last day together I knew it wouldn't be the last day. I'd find some reason to put off leaving until the next day, or the day after that and so on. I also didn't stay the last night at my house, one of us would have ended up in each others bed and that would have made it harder too. I'll never forget the image of her walking behind the jeep waving as we started to pull away, or the heart shattering sound of her screaming my name as she collapsed to the ground in sobs right before I begged Rixon to stop and let me go back to her. He wouldn't. He just kept driving. I hated him almost as much as the drunk who killed my parents in that moment. Later I realized that was exactly why I had to have him drive. I needed someone else to blame for not going back and Rixon did that for me. He's a good guy and aside from Nora, he knows almost everything about me. Almost.**

**Life here is hard everyday. Rarely for the same reasons. Some days it's just getting out of bed that's hard, putting one foot on the ground then the other, one leg in my jeans followed by the next is like moving concrete with a leaf. They started me out taking orientation classes, these are really important because we work with abused kids here and most of us are coming from situations that aren't so bright and cheery either. I sort of guessed that if I saw someone else pain than either I could continue to ignore mine (okay, so that wasn't what this was supposed to be about, it was about facing it, but come on, don't we all want to avoid what hurts us? I know that better now than I did to start with.). I've taken those damn series of classes three times now. I either didn't show up for all of them, I'm surprised they let me stay after that since time is money and they were housing me, taking care of all my basic needs and they could be helping someone more dedicated, but they kept me. The second time I was physically there, hey, it was progress. This is the third time and I'm starting to pay more attention. One thing that stuck with me came from a previous 'camp counselor' who said when they were here one of the most important things they learned was that pain was like water. Some people have an oceans worth, some have a lake and others a raindrop in comparison, but water is still water in ANY form. In other words, it didn't matter how many painful things happened, pain was still pain and as such it was painful. Period. There really isn't a comparison, it all hurts and comparing someone's ocean to your water drop doesn't do either of you any good, and the ocean was built one drop at a time so a water drop person today could be an ocean person tomorrow. That was hefty food for thought. My pain is my pain, no less and no more than someone else.**

**There have been days I've packed up my stuff and collapsed on my bed next to my luggage just done. They push me to talk about things, that's not going to happen, at least not to the degree they want it to. They want all the details of how I feel, what does my anger feel like emotionally, physically, does it build gradually or hit like sudden impact? What am I thinking and feeling right before I try to numb out? What was I thinking in the minutes leading up to whatever got me arrested that time? They wanted to talk about the night my parents died, what was I doing before I got the news...I was sooooo NOT going there. Who was with me and what were the following hours like. That always leads to questions about Nora, questions about our lives together and our friendship. Don't get me wrong, Nora is a sense of pride and joy, I'd be stupid to not only feel good about the friendship I've given her, meeting her needs through the years as best I could, but also in her for surviving some of the things she has to smile at me at the end of the day. Right now though, I'm not proud of myself at all and I know that me being here is destroying her so as much as they'd love to talk about Nora, I just can't. Not yet. They want me to work through some of these things so that I have experience of my own to help the younger one's we help here. 'On the job experience' if you will, I thought grimly. **

**I've actually packed my shit in my car before, even started to drive away before slamming my hand down on the steering wheel in frustration, pain, and submission. I don't submit well. The same thing pushing me to leave is the same thing pulling me back, making me stay. Nora. I know she needs me, needs me back there with her, that's just it though, she needs **_ME _**not this shell of a nobody who's void of anything except self-hate. I'm starting to see that a part of me was doing what I was doing because I had what they want to label as 'survivors guilt'. Putting a fancy label on something doesn't make it better, okay? I didn't give two fucks about your 'diagnosis' or how it makes you feel for me. I still don't care about your 'stages of grief'. What I care about is moving past this shit so I can get on with the tiny shreds of life I still have, if I have any left when I leave here. Meaning, if I stay long enough to pull enough of my crap together to make a life post self-detox. That's pretty much what this is, detoxing myself from myself. Here there aren't many decisions I get to make, sometimes that's good, sometimes that's really bad. Again, I'm not a submission kind of guy, I make my own rules. That doesn't fly here so I have no choice about having a choice if I want to stay here...and I do...part of the time.**

**Now that they're starting to realize that talking won't get me as far as they'd like they have me doing a lot of physical labor. What would have been easy before is a pain in the ass now. Since my mom was in the medical field health was important to our family. We used to go on family runs, went hiking and swimming. Nora and I spent countless days at lakes nearby or at the public pool swimming. When I got older I found that was useful for more reasons than exercise. Girls walked around in bikini's at bodies of water, natural or not and girls in bikini's made for nice viewing and great entertainment since I never fail to draw a crowd of admirers. My dad and I had a home gym and I did weight-lifting with him. It gave us time to talk and do something 'manly' together. Plus, it makes me hot, what girl doesn't appreciate a guy who's 'cut'? I haven't failed once to notice how their eyes rake over the curve of my biceps or the lines in my abdominal muscles. My mom used to tease me about having an unorthodox number of young girls needing heart repair surgery in the local area...I'd smirk and asked what her point was. Cocky? Yes, very much so. I've lost a lot of that now like I lost them. Those activities became haunted with memories of them so I quit doing them, not that I had the energy to anyways, or cared for that matter. My eyes, hair and Italian good looks were more than enough to still lure in ladies to spend a night away when I wanted. I was always careful, careful to not catch anything, careful to not pro-create, and definitely careful with my heart. I don't stay past sex and I **_DON'T _**cuddle, don't even ask I'm not staying for 'post-coital bliss' time. The only people I wanted to see in the morning were my parents, and the only one I ever wanted to wake up next to was Nora. When I woke up to Nora I woke up knowing she was safe, physically and emotionally. I don't know when I'll have that again, or if I ever will after what I'm putting her through...**

**Officer Grey, scratch that, 'Sargent' Grey...how had I missed that and why did he let me just call him 'Officer'? Has continued to take an active interest in both me and Nora. It's surprisingly nice that he takes the time to check in on me with the staff and with me. He comes to visit from time to time and calls at least once a week. I'd never tell him or anyone else what that means to me, but inside I know it matters, it matters a lot. We don't talk much about Nora, the reason I know that he has an interest in both of us is that anytime she does come up and I mention a question or a concern he either has an answer for me already or he jots it down in his little pocket notebook. If he takes as much time with his other 'cases' as he does with us he would be working round the clock. I think there's something more to it, I don't think he's like this with other kids. I bet he does his job to the best of his ability, he isn't a half ass kind of guy, but I have a distinct impression that there's more to it than that when it comes to me. I don't sense pity from him, that's a relief or I'd tell him to piss off. Pity keeps you feeling sorry for yourself and when you feel sorry for yourself you don't grow or learn. I should know. Maybe someday I'll ask him why the special interest in my case, in my life, who knows, at this point maybe I won't it's hard to say what I'll do moment from moment.**

**I hope that this all ends up being worth it, that I wasn't completely off track out of my mind for coming here. If I can get myself together enough to start being of use and doing some good than it could be...I think. I've seen some of the kids around here that we're helping..**_others _**are helping, me, not so much yet. Kids that brought in who were living on the street, kids that were so abused that they have no hope for adoption right now, kids that are socially stunted and need one on one to build skills in social settings and human interaction. Kids that saw horrific things like death of a loved one through murder, or a mother being raped...sick bastards, there isn't enough torture in the world to encompass a kid watching their loving mom get, well, tortured. If I'm ever able to *when* I'm able to work with these kids I might feel I'm accomplishing something. Time will tell.**

…**...**

* * *

_**NORA**_

_**I screamed his name. Screamed. He didn't come back. I was so hurt so angry. I had been there for him, didn't he see that? Didn't it matter? When the world forgot him, I didn't. I was there when his world ended, **__our __**world ended, and I was there to watch him drive away. I don't know who I'm more pissed at, Rixon or Patch. Rixon. Hands down it's Rixon, Patch would have turned around for me, he would have come back. I bet Rixon got some perverse pleasure from my pain. I swear when Patch isn't looking or Vee he gives me a look that sends shivers racing through me. Rixon is a tall guy, a little on the skinny side, especially next to Vee who is a few too many pounds past curvy like I'm sure I've mentioned. She's gorgeous though, if she weren't my best friend, second only to Patch, I'd be more than easily jealous of her. I've probably mentioned that before too. Rixon is sexy, I guess from what Vee says, in a roguish kind of way. She says that's like an Irish word for 'hott'. Who knows where she comes up with half of what she says. Sometimes I think Rixon really is a nice guy, that I'm just paranoid. He's sweet to Vee, we've gone places, Patch and I with him and Vee, like a double date without the date part for us, and he's always been most attentive. We go to the beach in the summer, ALWAYS for the fourth of July fireworks, and he always has his arms around her and they kiss and make-out a lot. That's awkward when Patch and I are sitting there together. It makes me blush and then Patch has ammunition to tease me for the rest of the day. They're all so much more experienced in that way than me, but that's the only way. I've done odd jobs around the neighborhood since I was a kid to earn spending cash. My piggy bank is usually anorexic, but hey, I earned that money it wasn't just given to me to not appreciate like with my greedy sister. I do excel in school, I'm responsible and good at making decisions. I admit my confidence is sometimes shaky and when it comes to boys I struggle a little, I haven't had experience with anyone but Scott. Honestly, boys just weren't on my radar that way. Scott and Patch were my only experiences. Patch was not what I'd call... I don't know what I'd call that... not smart, that's what it was, not smart.**_

_**I had just started to gain some self-confidence, to stand up for myself and hold my own against the spoiled brat when all the shit hit the fan. Sometimes I don't see how we could possibly be related, sad thing is, I know we are. There are times that I wish I could use my legal last name instead of Hanks. Nora Grey is a lot better than Nora Miller, aka big sister of the Coldwater Creek monster, Marcie Miller. I can't believe other people actually like her, maybe they don't, they probably just like our money and her popularity. She doesn't take care of herself, always on a diet or making herself throw up, anything to stay thin. Her thin is like a skeleton with skin, no muscle no fat, just skin on bone. Gross. That's so unhealthy she'll probably die young. As if I could be so lucky. Not that I wish **__real__** death on her, she is my sister (ugh), but why do good people like the Cipriano's die and people like her and my dad and step-mom live? I know I'm not the first person to ask that, still... She's been even worse since the car accident, and when she heard Patch had left she had a field day at my expense. She still is. 'See Nora, no one wants to be around you, you even drove your best friend away. Get it...drove.' She thinks that shit is so funny like cars, driving...Patch, are so funny. My pain is her gain, lately, she's gaining a LOT.**_

_**I've spent a lot of time at the Sky's house, Vee talks so much it keeps me occupied so I don't have to, actually, it just fills the silence so I don't have to listen to that. We talk about things she wants to do, she wants to start applying to colleges next year. She's thinking fashion or journalism. I used to have dreams like that, not anymore, at least...not right now. Patch and I always planned on going to college together, maybe even a coed dorm. We joked that when it came time for us to buy houses we'd probably buy them next door to each other. He'd tease me about how mad my husband would be when he'd wake up and find me in Patch's bed instead of next to him. The thought that at the time we both believed my future husband would be Scott only made his teasing me all that more funny to him. I had to laugh with him though, there probably would have been some truth in that. I didn't share the things with Scott I did with Patch. We didn't exactly have heart to hearts before we broke up. He liked to make fun of me, make jokes at my expense, Patch does too, but they're not the same. Scott did it in a way that could come off mean and would've pissed Patch off had he known. That was one of those things I filed under the 'you didn't ask so I didn't tell you' files. I wasn't lying or hiding anything from him per se, I just didn't mention it. I know it's crazy, but since Patch has left I sometimes think I made a mistake breaking up with Scott. I mean, Patch does have a reputation and we were kind of close and after what almost...**__don't think about that, don't even go there, nothing happened Nora, nothing would have happened, nothing is going to happen, he felt nothing, you felt nothing, it was NOTHING..._** I have to remind myself that what *didn't* happen that fateful night is for the best, what would have happened if *nothing* had turned in to a whole lot of 'something' and then we got the call. Things are bad now, things are really bad now, they would be unbearable then. I'm a complete wreck and I'm totally alone. That's where my thoughts of Scott come in. They say you see the past through rose-tinted glasses when it comes to people you lose or loneliness, I couldn't be more lonely. **

**I stay at Patch's a lot. I just go there and lay in his bed trying to pretend he's there with me. I pretend that he's laying next to me and that we are talking, I tell him about my day, what Marcie did at school to torture me. I tell him about what's going on with my dad. How he talks about me taking over the family business which just makes Marcie hate me all the more. I don't want the family business, I don't want to be a part of his family at all. 'Talking' to Patch I tell him how I've started to think about my mom, my **birth** mom. What is she like? Does she remember having me? Does she ever think of me? What does she look like? Do I really look like her? If she was here would she have taught me how to read? Would she have taught me how to cook, like Patch's parents taught him? Italian's make the best foods. I miss Patch... I wonder what my mom would think about him. Would she help me understand why he had to leave or would she be upset with him like me? I don't know why I'm suddenly thinking so much about her, I guess it's just the loneliness getting to me, seeping into every thought like dampness spreading through my bones.**

**I've talked to Sargent Grey a few times since Patch left. Sometimes I think I see him watching me, but when I look closer no one is there. I think I might be going crazy. I'm talking to my friend who isn't there like a little kid with an imaginary friend, I'm seeing people follow me that aren't, and I'm becoming obsessed with a woman I've never met. Who knows what's next. Maybe I'll run away with the circus, I thought angrily. If I ran away nobody would miss me, Vee would, that would be it. Okay, not true, Patch would, but right now I almost couldn't care less if he did or not...almost. **

**It took me weeks to pick up his calls. He text me fifty times a day checking on me. He wanted to know if I was okay, I gave him detailed accounts of how I was like, 'fine' or 'peachy'. I think he got the hint because he doesn't ask me that anymore. I feel bad at times when he calls about how I'm treating him, I mean they were his parents and he's hurting, I know he is. Silence has never been uncomfortable between us, now though we will be talking somewhat and then we don't know what to say to each other and so we don't say anything, it's then that I feel the worse because I can 'hear' the thoughts going through his head, him questioning if he is doing the right thing, if he should leave and throw in the towel to head home to me. That's it, this isn't 'home' for him right now. He was dying in that house. As much as I want him here with me it's the most selfish of things to ask for, so I don't. I also don't try to ease his mental turmoil, some best friend I am. Hard times can bring out the best and the worst in people, apparently right now it's bringing out the worst in me. I hope that changes.**

** I'm sick of feeling sick. I even look bad, I never looked great, but I never looked like this. My hair is hanging limp and dull, my eyes are flat or cold most of the time, my skin is pale and my mouth is grim, my jaw is tight, I've lost too much weight off my already tiny frame. My once 'bar-stool' legs look like twigs and my eyes have dark circles from too little sleep. Patch has wanted to Skype, no way in hell am I letting him see me like this. I know he wouldn't say anything, scratch that he would have a LOT to say about it, but as much as I wish at times he could see how very much I'm suffering, how much worse it is without him here, I can't bring myself to actually let him see. I hate to admit he's right, he needs to take care of himself, he has no one else left to do it, besides me and I wasn't doing a very good job of it. Neither one of us could take care of the other so I guess he had a valid point.**

…**...**

**Christmas is over thank God. Whoever distributes 'Christmas spirit' skipped me completely. Vee was busy with her family, I could have gone over there I suppose, but I didn't feel like watching a bunch of people all happy and lovey dovey exchanging gifts while I sat there alone in silence like a ghost haunting the holidays. Plus, why go and depress them. The day got a hell of a lot better though when I went to Patch's to cry my eyes out in his bed and there on it right in the center was the most beautiful Sapphire Macaw feather and a gift for me from Patch. He must have had Rixon deliver it. It made me cry, but not for the reason I thought I would be. I had sent him a package too and after seeing his gift I decided to suck it up and Skype with him. His roommate answered the call and said Patch would be right back so I waited, I could see the door to their room from where the camera was angled and when he walked in he looked so sad my tears started all over, the one's I said I wasn't going to cry. When his roommate told him I was online for him though his face lit up and that made my heart swell. He still loved me, he hadn't forgotten me. I knew he hadn't but... We talked for hours, it felt so good. He teased me about being in his bed. I told him I just liked his sheets, he asked me if it was anything else, I said "yes, you're mattress too." That made him laugh. I told him I was thinking about escaping to his bed all day, he said he was thinking about his bed too and I asked if it was his mattress or his sheets or maybe his perfect pillows (that still smell just like him). He said "no, I was thinking about **_you __**in my bed." Of course that made me blush and that lead to him teasing me some more. Towards the end we started talking about his birthday. He had made a pact with me to always spend that time with me and even though he's never broken a promise to me before I was scared this would be a first so I was thrilled when he said he'd already made arrangements for leave so he'd be with me. We're going to plan a weekend away from Coldwater Creek together, we're going to the town his parents were visiting when they were killed, it just happens to be the town his parents are buried in too. We are going to go out for his birthday, just like we did every year, then the next day we will do something together, have lunch and visit their graves before returning to our room to watch movies together and eat ice cream. Movies were his idea, ice-cream was mine. I'm **__NOT __**one of those girls who buries her problems in a gallon of Ben and Jerry's or sits and watches a weekend marathon of sappy movies, but the idea of quiet time, just the two of us sounded really good after being away for so long. We probably would end up talking more than watching movies anyways. The best part is that his birthday is THIS weekend! I know right! I'm so excited I've been shaking for days, I haven't been this happy since before... This time apart hasn't been easy, but maybe, JUST maybe it will be worth it. If this is what he needs than I need to support him like it or not.**_


	14. Chapter 14 - ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY

**DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING, ESPECIALLY THE HUSH HUSH CHARACTERS CREATED BY BECCA FITZPATRICK... IF I DID PATCH WOULD BE NAKED A LOT MORE...PREFERABLY WITH US RIGHT LADIES?**

**I apologize it has been so long since I have updated this story. I'm not totally satisfied with this chapter but you have all waited long enough. There are a lot of things going on here I'm deciding which to explore more such as what is the deal with Sargent Grey... Also, the sexual tension and issues with Patch and Nora...sooooo not over so don't give up there is more to come on that front, in the meantime these two needed some time face to face together before other things (*people* Dabria and maybe somebody else pays them a visit...did you really think there would be a Patch and Nora without Dabria? She'd never allow that!) happen in their lives. Things can never be easy.**

* * *

_**CHAPTER 14**_

_**ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY**_

_**PATCH**_

I was shocked when I came back to my room and my roommate said that Nora was waiting on Skype for me on Christmas. The only one who remembered me this Christmas was Nora, her gifts were what I got. They meant a lot, but Nora meant more. Her video chat was worth more to me than anything anyone could buy. We were both alone for the holiday for the first time. Sargent Grey called to check on us, that was nice of him, but it's not the same as having my parents. The best part of Nora and my conversation came towards the end when I told her I had already requested a home visit and had it approved for my birthday and the anniversary of my parents death. There was no one else I'd rather spend my time away with, especially this weekend. It had been so hard being away from her, I still feel being here might be failing her, but I know that if I don't get my shit together...well things could be a hell of a lot worse. I wouldn't make it through this weekend alone though, Nora was probably the only thing that could pull me through and keep me somewhat distracted so I didn't spend the _whole _time in a dark cloud of anger and misery brooding over what I couldn't change. I just kept telling myself, the past doesn't change but people do and that's why I'm here.

We have some tentative plans and the rest we will wing, whatever we do I know we'll have fun. I haven't been with a girl since being here, _that's_ unheard of and you could say I'm going a little stir crazy in more than one way. What happened last year would have been a colossal mistake so as much as I'm not glad or thankful my parents were killed, I _am _grateful we were interrupted from doing something that would ruin our friendship. Nora and I be devastated without each other and I can't let that happen.

She looked really rough on video chat so I'm anxious to see that she's okay. I know she isn't good, neither of us are, but I don't want her sick. Sargent Grey assured me she wasn't and I got the impression he was watching her almost as closely as I would if I was there. Almost.

My bags are packed and I'm ready to head out. I put some music on in my jeep and didn't look back. It felt good to get out on the interstate and just drive. I love to drive, it reminds me of flying. I've never flown, obviously I don't have wings, but it's how I imagine it to be. The freedom, the acceleration, the twists and turns. You can clear your head a lot by just driving, cliché but becoming one with the road and all. It felt good to put some space and distance between me and the ranch. I'd promised myself I wasn't going to think about the place during my time off. This was about spending time with my best friend who I missed deeply. I needed this, _we _needed this.

It was seven at night when I pulled into the valet parking at our hotel. We were staying at the same place that my parents had stayed their final night together, we were actually staying in the same room they had rented. That may sound a little morbid to others but my parents had loved each other deeply and this room would hold good memories they shared together so it seemed fitting that we would share good memories together here in honor of them and their last moments. I shot Nora a text to let her know I had arrived. I had text her when I was fifteen minutes away and apparently she had checked in and decided to wait in the lobby because I had barely sent the message when she came flying through the doors and launched herself into my arms. Hugging each other and laughing I spun her around and paid no attention to the looks we were getting. Some smiled, beaming at us like they thought we were lovers separated by war or something finally united while others glared at the spectacle we were making. Either way I could care less it just felt good to have her safe in my arms again. I did notice, however, that she was lighter, she'd lost more weight and the sadness inside of me got a little heavier.

I sat her down but kept my arm around her as I guided her back into the hotel letting her lead me to our room as we talked.

"I missed you, Patch."

"I missed you too, Angel. You look good." Well...It was the right thing to say

"You've never lied to me before don't start now, Cipriano." She elbowed me in the ribs.

"Would you have rather I said 'hey Grey, you look like shit, you've lost too much weight and you're looking pale like you saw a ghost.'" I smirked at her.

"At least it would've been honest." She mock glared at me.

"Nora, you will always be pretty in my eyes, but you're right I don't like the way you look. You need to start eating, get some sun when it comes out again. In fact, let me set my bags down and we're going to start you eating right now. Come on." We'd reached the room we were sharing and I unlocked the door. I set my bag down on the only bed in the room and without bothering to unpack I grabbed her hand and started dragging her back out the door.

"I..I meant to warn you that there was only one bed in the room. I didn't ask when I booked it and I just got here when you..." I rolled my eyes and gave her a pointed look.

"Since when do you sleep in your own bed and not mine anyways? We both know you would have been in mine within thirty minutes of lights out if not before. Plus, since it was only my parents staying here and it was Valentines Day AND it's the honeymoon suite it was fairly easy to deduce that it would have one bed." I smirked.

"True, now that you mention it." She laughed.

"What do you want for dinner?" I opened the door on my jeep for her. No way in hell I'd be riding in her car, I didn't even like the thought of her riding in that thing. It was a year old and already she had to bang on the dash to get it to start and even before I left it had been so gutless she'd have been faster flint-stoning the damn thing. I'd buy her a car but she'd never accept it, Nora's stubborn that way.

"I'm not that hungry we could just grab a..."

"If you say a burger at a fast food joint I'm going to pull over and spank you, Nora Grey." I gave her my best glare and laced my voice with menace.

"Are you threatening me with a good time, Cipriano?" She laughed, apparently my menace wasn't menacing enough.

"Oh, so you're into the kinky stuff...Naughty Nora, I'll have to remember that." I winked at her and reached over to poke her in the ribs making her squeal. It was so good to see her smile and hear her laugh.

"Don't you DARE call me that...Jev."

"We don't use my real name unless I'm in serious trouble, you and I had that talk when we were five." I glared at her before turning back to the road having decided we would go for taco's.

"If you call me naughty Nora again you will be in a world of trouble." She punched me in the arm.

"Stop, you're turning me on you know I like it rough." I teased her and watched her blush creep up her face. "You look good in that shade of pink, you should wear it more often."

"If you keep this up I'm going home."

"You know you love me."

"It's a tough job but somebody has to do it, nobody else will. I consider it my cross to bare, we all have one and you're mine."

"Gee..thanks." I deadpanned. I pulled into the parking lot and went around to open the door her and help her out.

The interior of the restaurant was an eclectic mix of orange, yellow, blue, pink, turquoise, red and purple. It was bright and cheery and smelled delicious. A young woman I would guess around the age of twenty by the name of Maria greeted us. I couldn't help but notice that she had more sway in her walk after spotting me than before, or the way she leaned towards me her cleavage on full display after asking if my girlfriend would like anything to drink and I had corrected her. I was about to say something to "Maria" when I caught sight of Nora's face. It was not looking happy or carefree like it had been before we came in. I couldn't tell if it was because "Maria" was practically bent over with her ass in Nora's face or if it was sheer annoyance at having our time interrupted. Either way I thought it better to keep the flirting with the hostess to a minimum even if another part of me was telling me not too. That part was below my belt and letting me know without a doubt how unhappy 'he' was.

"Maybe next time she'll bring a pen so you can sign her boobs." Nora snapped.

"Wow, spoken like a true jealous girlfriend." I joked.

"Don't flatter yourself, there are plenty of others doing it for you." I couldn't help but notice that even though she put me in my place like she always did she avoided my eyes and was worrying her lip. I didn't like the avoiding part and the lip..._best to not go there Patch_.

"Ouch." I feigned hurt.

"Whatever. What is it about you that brings out the desperation in women?"

"Are you saying that women have to be desperate to want me?" I raised my eyebrow at her.

"No, and you know that's not what I meant. Why do they think the only way to get your attention is to shove their half-naked bodies in your face?"

"Because for one, it works. Don't give me that look I'm just being honest, it only works for twenty minutes of fun though and then guys like me dispose of them because we're looking for good girls like you to settle down with." I was half-joking half serious. Girls like Nora were the one's guy's looking to settle down would want, not me, but any other smart guy.

"I'm not getting married, I'm going to die alone."

"You're not going to die alone because you're always going to have me."

"True, your like a rash I can't get rid of."

"Right back at you, Grey." We laughed.

Our food came and I kept Nora smiling and laughing enough that she didn't even notice that her 'not very hungry' stomach had consumed her meal and half of mine just as I had hoped. It was good that I ordered extra since my non-existent appetite made an appearance with hers.

After dinner we drove back to the hotel. I held Nora's hand like we had done since we were kids, it wasn't a gesture of romance it was a reassurance of safety, the motto 'hold hands when you cross the street' never wore off when my mom quit saying it to us. We were in the elevator with an elderly couple when the woman turned to her husband.

"Just look at them dear. Don't they just remind you so much of us at their age?" I heard her say.

"You were a beautiful young thing, you still are dear." He smiled at his wife.

"To be young and in love.." She sighed and smiled at us.

"Oh, we're not together, not like that, I mean, we're not in love she's my best friend." I explained and Nora blushed.

"If you're not in love you will be. I can see it already, you two were meant to be." She patted my cheek and her husband patted me on my shoulder on their way out of the elevator. He stopped and turned around right before the door shut. "You'd be wise to listen to my wife, she hasn't been wrong yet on matters of the heart and you got a keeper there son." With that they shuffled away together her hand holding his arm.

He was right about one thing at least, Nora was a keeper, only she wasn't mine to keep. For just a moment I allowed myself to consider what life would be like if she was. I pictured us buying our first car and our first house together near wherever we decided to go to college, maybe get a dog or a cat eventually. We looked happy together.

"This is our floor, you going to sleep in the elevator?" Nora's voice snapped me out of thoughts and the spell was broke.

I slid the key card into the slot on our door and opened it. The room was black lacquer with ruby-red and gold accents. On the wall in front of the large bed was a big black granite gas fireplace, above that was a sixty inch plasma TV. Along the wall behind the bed and on the ceiling directly above was mirrored. There was a sitting area with black micro-suede couches and chairs facing a matching fireplace. The opposite side had an in-room jacuzzi tub and the bathroom was finished in black granite with a makeup vanity and a large three-way glass shower. The carpeting throughout was a deep ruby-red plush that felt like you were walking on air.

I headed to the bathroom for a shower needing to cleanup after the drive.

When I come out of the bathroom to grab my lounge pants I can't help but stop and stare a moment. Nora is sitting in the big bed, right in the middle watching the fire blaze and it's casting moving shadows and light over her, catching the red in her hair and the creaminess of her skin. She's definitely lost weight but her beauty is still there and for a moment my breath catches in my throat and I have to swallow. She looked so sad though.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

"They're not worth a penny."

"Sure they are." I really want to know what was making her look that way, was something more going on at home I wasn't aware of?

"Sometimes I feel like there's something big I'm meant to do, something great and I feel so empowered, but most the time now I just feel lost." Her voice was so sad and barely above a whisper.

"I know what you mean, not exactly, but close. I'm always here to listen, Nora, all you have to do is call and I'll make time for you no matter what. You know that don't you, you're never going to be alone." I bent over and kissed the top of her head. "This weekend we are going to have fun, okay?"

"Okay." When she turns to smile up at me I can't help but feel a jolt of electricity shoot straight to my groin as her eyes darken to a smoky gray when she notices for the first time I'm still wet and wrapped in a towel. She's seen me millions of times like this so I convince myself it's all in my head, but I could have sworn she licked her bottom lip because my eyes followed it and my tongue wanted a piece of the action. Before I let my temporary insanity get the best of me I grabbed my pants and darted back to the bathroom coming out when I was dressed.

"Is the bed comfortable?" I asked her when I reemerge.

"It doesn't have your silk sheets." She gave a pout that made me laugh.

"Not everyone can have my taste in bedding."

"It's a big bed and as comfortable as yours but it's missing the cool silk sheets and that's like your bed without you in it, it just feels wrong."

"Next year you can pack a set of my sheets, deal? I'll even help you remake the bed so you can sleep on them."

"I do sleep on them, every night almost." I was a little shocked by that, I knew she spent time there I just didn't know it was that much.

"What's going on? Is something happening at home you haven't told me?" If her dad was hurting her I was going to kill him, he'd need an army to protect him from me.

"They're still involved in that club or whatever it is. I don't think I want to know anything about it. They wear these rings and it's like everybody that stops by the house male or female from the club is extremely tall and just big like strong-looking. They give me the creeps. Sometimes I swear someone's following me, but when I look no one is there. I asked Vee to check a few times, now I think she thinks I'm just paranoid, maybe I am. I feel safer at your place, and Hank started opening my door at night to 'check on me' and it creeps me out. We had a big fight the first time he found out I was sneaking over to your place but since you're not there he can't really say much."

"I don't like the idea of anyone following you, you're right, you might just be being paranoid but better safe than sorry I'm going to talk to the Sargent about it."

"It's no big deal I'm sure it's nothing."

"When it comes to you it is a big deal. We better get some sleep so we have energy for tomorrow."

"Shopping, picnic and dancing."

"Do we still have to shop? I hate shopping."

"Suck it up Cipriano, I need a new outfit for the club."

"Fine." I grumbled. "Anything for you, but I think you're taking advantage of your best friend privileges for the record."

"Notation made. Good night Patch."

"Good night Nora." I pulled her in close to me nuzzling my nose into her hair and unconsciously pulling in her scent. It felt good again to hold her and I could already feel myself falling into a better sleep than I had since I'd left home.

* * *

_**NORA**_

_Slowly my brain started to wake. I was pressed up against something like my back was up against a wall only the wall was...Patch, that's right! He's here! His arm is around me and his nose is buried in my neck, his breathing is soft and steady. He's still asleep. Instead of jumping up and pouncing on him like I want to so we can talk more and get started with our day I take a breath letting it circulate through my body to calm me and I focus on the way I feel right _now _in this moment. I feel warm, safe, secure...happy. I'm laying on my right side and his right arm is tucked under my waist wrapped protectively around my stomach and his left arm is over my waist laying diagonally up between my breasts to rest his hand on my right shoulder. As soon as I took the deep breath he nuzzled deeper into my hair and his grip tightened around me. I wonder if this is what it feel like for couples when they wake up together, if this is how his dad held his mom their last morning together. _

_All you hear anymore is divorce rates, who left who for who to screw who, who wanted only money or sex or didn't want kids or wanted to many. Why didn't couples talk about these things ahead of times? I never understood that. Patch's parents talked about anything and everything and him and I talk that way too so why don't people who are thinking about getting married? Maybe they do and one or both just aren't honest. Then again, what's the point of marrying someone if you're not comfortable being honest with them? I used to think that Scott and I were meant to be, that we would graduate, go to college, get engaged, finish college, marry, have great careers, have kids...the works. Now I don't think I want to ever get married, I think I'm going to live my life single like Patch. I hate the way people assume if you're a girl you want to get married and have kids, that you need a man to complete you, well you don't. I need Patch as a person, not as a man. I'd be just as happy having him as my best friend if he was a girl, it would change certain things, I don't see myself curled up in the arms of another girl quite like this. I mean, Vee and I are close, like really close, she's my 'untwin', but I'd be a little more than freaked out if her arm was draped through the valley of my breasts and she was... _Oh no, we are not starting that again! _I don't know which of us started with the hip thrusting first but it was impacting both of us._

"_Patch?" I hear him mumble something incoherently. "Are you awake?" I knew he wasn't but I needed him to be, evidence of our more than friendly bodily greeting was very present and it was ushering in a slew of thoughts of him, me and a silk necktie that didn't need to be exist in my head..._

"_No." He groaned, pulling me tighter._

"_As comfortable as this is and as much as I've missed this, I need to move." To make my point I bumped him ever so lightly and he jolted back. _

"_I swear I didn't mean anything from it I wasn't doing anything I..." He looked like I was about to accuse him of rape. I had to laugh._

"_Patch, chill, it's no big deal you didn't do anything, you were sound asleep and I just woke up. I just thought I'd prevent anything from becoming...uncomfortable later you know. It's nice to know some part of you reacts to the fact that I am a girl." I teased him. Well, partly, because sometimes there was a piece of me that felt like he didn't notice that I wasn't just another guy like Rixon, except for last year on his birthday and that was...a freak thing he was just buzzed and I took advantage of that to work out some of those frustrating fantasies I had had about him. I know he wouldn't hold another guy like he does me, but I think for him I'm more of a sister. I don't know why that sort of bugs me now. I don't want things to change between us or be weird. I'm not in love with him and I know he's not in love with me. I don't want be another one of his bed buddies, sexually I mean, since I'm really his only __**real**__ bed buddy. To have someone who looks like Patch look at you the way he did that slut "Maria" last night at dinner, like she's the last lollipop in the candy store and he wants to lick her would be...nice, I mean it has to feel good to capture the attention of someone like him when you know could have anyone they want. Not that I'd know, I'm plain ol Nora, jeans, t-shirt, tennis shoes most days Nora, not 'you got what I need Maria'. I guess it's not really about Patch per se it's just feeling sexy like that. Desirable, that's what I want to feel, desirable._

"_Okay, well, um, I'm going to go hop in the shower now so we can get ready to leave." Patch never stutters. Ever. _

"_You're not going to get all Junior High shy on me are you?" I teased. I don't know why I'm so comfortable with this morning, normally I'm the one whose ten shades of red with no words. _

"_No." He laughed. "It's just that after last year I..." I knew what he wanted to say, we came really close to doing something we'd never done that we couldn't ever take back and he didn't want to lose me any more than I wanted to lose him._

"_I know. Now go shower so I can take one after you."_

"_Ladies first." I rolled my eyes knowing better than to argue...this time...and went to take my shower._

_An hour later he was helping me across the ice to the jeep._

"_Where do you want to go first?" He asked me._

"_Let's just hit the mall, that way there will be a lot of stores to choose from if I don't find what I need in the first one."_

"_Now you sound like a girl."_

"_I am a girl." I glared at him._

"_Yes, but you're a girl who hates shopping."_

"_So. Maybe I want to look nice." I sniffed._

"_You always look nice."_

"_Dammit, Patch, can you just take me to the mall please?" Okay, that was a little harsher than I'd meant it to be._

"_You're really tense, are you okay?" He reached his right hand over, steering with only his left hand and started rubbing soothing patterns into my thigh with his thumb. Honestly, I wasn't okay, ever since I had thought of that hostess again my insides were churning in something waaaay to close to jealousy for my liking._

"_I'm fine."_

"_When a woman says she's fine she's **never** fine." I didn't respond so when we stopped at a light he locked his midnight eyes on me and searched my face until I looked away._

"_This is about that girl at the restaurant last night." It was a statement, not a question. Damn him. I swear he can read my thoughts sometimes._

"_I don't want to talk about it." Why were my eyes starting to sting a little like I was going to cry? I swallowed and continued to look out the window until I felt Patch look away and start to drive again._

"_Okay." That's all he said._

"_Okay?" He never let things drop like that._

"_Okay. If you don't want to talk about it then we won't."_

"_Wow."_

"_Wow what?" He raised a questioning eyebrow at me._

"_I never pictured you as a quitter."_

"_I didn't quit."_

"_You rolled over on your belly and gave up without a fight."_

"_I did not! You didn't want to talk so I'm not making you!"_

"_Since when do you ever give me a choice?" Why was I so irritable?_

"_Remember earlier when I said you were being a girl?"_

"_Yeah."_

"_I was wrong. __**Now**__ you're being a girl." _

"_Oh god, I am." I groaned after thinking over the last several minutes conversation. "Forgive me?"_

"_Always, Angel." He smiled and squeezed my thigh before pulling into a parking space in front of the mall._

_We finished our shopping, I had found an outfit I liked and Patch got something after I insisted, then we went for a picnic, yes it was cold but when you grow up in a cold climate you learn how to adjust. In other words, we bundled up and took a blankets with us, one to sit on and another to wrap around us then we sat on the beach eating hot clam chowder together and talking. Now we were back at the hotel and getting ready to go out._

_I slip into the light-colored jeans I bought that fit so good I can't believe I found a pair I actually like. Most jeans either don't fit right or they don't look right or both, but these are perfect. They have decorated pockets that will reflect the light at the club and I found the perfect top to go with it, it's violet and it's made with a spandex blend so it hugs my body and looks great with the wide belt that goes with my low slung jeans. It's lightweight so it won't be so hot with all the heat the bodies in the club put off. When I finish buckling my belt I pull on my black boots and after trying a few unsuccessful up-dos with my hair I give up and do the little finger twist curls to frame my face that I learned and spritz a light mist of body spray and step out to meet Patch._

"_You look great, Angel." Patch reached for my hand and kissed the back of it, bowing his head like a gentleman he most definitely is not, at least not to others._

"_You don't look too bad yourself." I winked at him taking in his dark blue jeans and navy t-shirt that was hugging all of his muscles like a second skin. Of course he had his black motorcycle boots on and we both had our leather jackets with us._

"_So where are we going?" I asked him as he fastened in the driver's seat._

"_A little club I found that is playing music from my parents teenage years tonight like Aerosmith, Guns n Roses, Bon Jovi, that sort of stuff. It seemed fitting if that's okay with you?"_

"_Sounds great." I smiled feeling really good about the evening._

_The night passed by fast, we had a lot of fun dancing and talking. _

"_Are you ready to go? I have a place I want to stop if you don't mind when we're done here."_

"_One last dance and then we can go. This place you want to go is still open at this hour?" He asked me with his eyebrow raised._

"_Yes it is, it's sort of a birthday idea that I came up with, I don't want to tell you yet." I said kind of shyly. I really wanted to get a tattoo with him, I had an idea but I'd never talked to him about tattoo's so I didn't know how he'd feel. He looked like the type of guy that would have several so maybe he wouldn't be too opposed.._

"_Alright. One last song." He grinned and led me to the crowded dance floor._

_The song started to play and Patch pulled me into his arms._

"_I know this song." He told me._

"_Did your parents play it?"_

"_Yes and I have it on my iPod, it reminds me of you."_

"_Of me?" I laughed._

"_Just listen." So I did, I listened to it as he held me and sang along with it softly in my ear._

_**Sweet Child O' Mine**_

_**BY GUNS N ROSES**_

_**SHE'S GOT A SMILE THAT IT SEEMS TO ME**_

_**REMINDS ME OF CHILDHOOD MEMORIES**_

_**WHERE EVERYTHING**_

_**WAS AS FRESH AS THE BRIGHT BLUE SKY**_

_**NOW AND THEN WHEN I SEE HER FACE**_

_**SHE TAKES ME AWAY TO THAT SPECIAL PLACE**_

_**AND IF I STARED TOO LONG**_

_**I'D PROBABLY BREAK DOWN AND CRY**_

_**SWEET CHILD O' MINE**_

_**SWEET CHILD O' MINE**_

_**SHE'S GOT EYES OF THE BLUEST SKIES**_

_**AS IF THEY THOUGHT OF RAIN**_

_**I'D HATE TO LOOK INTO THOSE EYES**_

_**AND SEE AN OUNCE OF PAIN**_

_**HER HAIR REMINDS ME OF A WARM SAFE PLACE**_

_**WHERE AS A CHILD I'D HIDE**_

_**AND PRAY FOR THE THUNDER AND THE RAIN**_

_**TO QUIETLY PASS ME BY**_

_**SWEET CHILD O' MINE**_

_My heart melted and tears started to sting my eyes. He really felt that way about me? I know I'm important to him, it's just that I don't hear it from people really, only him and Vee so when I do hear it it's emotional. To think __**I**__ made someone else happy felt really good._

"_Hey...you're not supposed to cry." He wiped a tear away that had somehow managed to escape._

"_I'm not, I was simply doing my weekly tear-duct cleaning." I laughed and sniffled a little._

"_Your weekly tear-duct cleaning? Is that like your annual spring cleaning?" He teased me._

"_Yeah, something like that. Come on I have an idea for your birthday and the first anniversary memorial all in one."_

"_Hmmm...A birthday gift and it's a memorial?" I could see his brain at work trying to figure me out._

"_If you wanted, I mean, you might not when you find out what it is and that's okay it's just an idea."_

"_This." I stopped in front of a shop that I had tugged him along the sidewalk to and watched as he looked up to read the sign._

"_A tattoo shop? You want to get a tattoo?" He looked at me skeptically._

"_Yes, but only if you do. I dropped off a design idea earlier if you want to look at it?"_

"_Of course, Angel, lead the way. You just never struck me like a tattoo kind of girl."_

"_I'm not, I'm more of a 'your kind of girl'" Patch gave me one of his lazy grins that looked so sexy it could melt your panties off you...if I was in to him that way, which of course I'm not._

"_So tell me about this design." I had the man at the counter pull out the art I had ordered created and Patch whistled under his breath. That was a good sign._

"_Half goes on your right hip, the rest goes on my left, that way when we face each other it makes a full tattoo design. The feather is obviously our symbol, the black one forming the half heart on my side is symbolic of the black one mom gave you and the white feather forming the other half of the heart on you is her representation of me. On the inside of my half is your name because you'll always be in my heart. My name goes on the inside of yours because..."_

"_You'll always be in my heart. The Cipriano is split in two because my family, represented by my surname, is in both our hearts..."_

"_...and surrounds us with love. Do you like it? We don't have to do it, I know it's a tattoo and they're permanent and..."_

"_I love it. Let's do it, but we have to make a pact, renew our vow when it's over. Deal?"_

"_Deal!" I was really nervous about the tattoo yet extremely excited. _

_It didn't hurt as bad as I thought, it didn't hurt Patch at all. Sometimes I swear he doesn't feel anything. I've seen him get hurt and not react at all._

"_Tattoo's done...now for the pact." Patch softly traced the still red outline of my fresh tattoo. They looked really good and I could tell that they meant a lot to him. I was happy that he had liked my idea, now we would carry a part of each other on us always. We'd always been in each others hearts where we could feel it now we could visually see it._

_"I promise you can count on me when you need a shoulder to lean on. I promise to be here, when you're alone. I promise I'll be there when you need somebody to talk to. I know you feel the same about me as I do about you because you put up with all the stupid things I do and I hope that never changes. You know I love you and I'll never put no one else above you. We are the only family we have left, you're my only family, Angel, so I vow to stand by your side guarding you, loving you, protecting you, being your friend, your family, whatever you need me to be. I promise to spend my birthday and the anniversary of my parents death with you each year..."_

_We finished exchanging our vows and promises and laid in bed talking for hours. The sun was almost coming up when we finally fell asleep._

_We woke up and went for breakfast together then to the spot his parents lost their lives before going to their graves where we both took turns speaking to them. This would become our annual routine and the hardest part of the trip._

"Hi mom. Hi dad. I can't believe it's been a year since I got to see you. I'm glad that I made it over for Patch's gifts last year so I got to be apart of your final happy moments together. I could've missed it since Patch and I hadn't been talking. That was my fault, I let something really stupid come between us and I promise to try to not do that again. It's been so rough this year without you guys. Patch left, can you believe that? He left me, not like I blame him, I wasn't doing a very good job of taking care of him like you guys did. Caring for someone is hard work when you're a mess yourself. I didn't get it to begin with, how he could walk away from me like that. I kind of get it now though, he wants to be strong for me and to do that he needs to be strong for him. I was doing better than him, he really fell apart. He was drinking all the time and getting arrested, it wasn't just school suspensions this time. You guys would've been so mad you would've taken his motorcycle back from him. He wouldn't have been this way if you were still alive though. I couldn't face him after he left, this is the first time I've seen him since and I'm terrified of having to watch him leave again. This time I know it's for the best, he's slowly starting to get better. I have to remind myself it's better that he's there and not dead or in prison. I promise I will stay in better touch with him and I won't leave him like everyone else did. Did you know that the only people who still talk to him really are me, Rixon and the Sargent that told him about you guys? I won't ever turn my back on him or walk away from him like your parents did. Nothing he could do could make me turn my back on him..." _I finished my conversation with Patch's parents and rejoined him in the car._

_The next morning I woke up to Patch tracing my tattoo again._

"_What ya thinking about?"_

"_I don't want to leave you."_

"_Then don't." I brightened up, then I realized how selfish that was, being there helping others was helping him and I couldn't take that away from him because it was best for me. "You have to go back, you made the right choice even if it nearly killed me and even if it's going to kill me again to say good-bye to you." I traced his outline with my fingertip._

"_I don't know if I can do it again. If I can leave. I wouldn't have left last time if I hadn't made Rixon drive, he refused to turn around. That was the closest I've ever been to killing him."_

"_I figured that was the case. I hated him for so long, I still do. I had dreams of different ways I could kill him for taking you away from me."_

"_You never have really liked him."_

"_No, I do, he's good to Vee, I just...I don't know, sometimes I get these weird feelings when I'm around him."_

"_Maybe he likes you." Patch's eyes were lit in amusement._

"_I'm glad you find it funny." I said dryly._

"_Do you think you'll date again?"_

"_What?"_

"_Do you think you'll date again? Things didn't end so well between you and Scott because of me, now I'm not there to screw things up for you, do you think you'll date someone else?"_

"_Patch, you didn't screw things up for me and I don't know. I'm not really interested in anyone I have enough trouble keeping the little bit of focus I have right now to worry about dating yet." His question kind of threw me, I wasn't entirely sure what had made him ask me that or that the look of relief that flashed through his eyes had really been there at all._

_We were standing outside of my car getting ready to say our good-bye's. The sun was shining off of the snow making it almost blindingly light out and beautiful. As bright as it was outside my insides were dark. I hate this part, I knew it was coming, I'd been preparing myself all day for it but it didn't make it any easier._

"_I had a good time Nora, thank-you. I didn't know if I was going to make it through this and somehow we managed to pull each other through again. The tattoo was the best idea, I'm glad you thought of it. Now I'll have your heart with me wherever I go."_

"_You've always had my heart. Now try picking up girls with my name on you permanently." I teased._

"_I'll let you know if I see any."_

_I rolled my eyes. "Why? Don't they have girls there?"_

"_Yes, I just haven't had time."_

"_Patch Cipriano doesn't have time for girls? Since when?" I scoffed. _

"_Good point well made." He laughed. "I'm going to miss you you know that right?"_

"_Yeah I do, I'm going to miss you too, Patch. God I wish you didn't have to.."_

"_I don't I could..."_

"_You do." I said firmly. "You need to do this so you can get better and come back to me, so we can make mom and dad proud of us. What kind of best friend would I be if I let you give up? The last six months you've been away from me would be for nothing." _

"_If that's really what you want, Angel." He pulled me into a hug._

"_Yes, that's really what I want." Hell no it wasn't what I wanted, but it was what he needed and I couldn't be selfish with him, not after all he had done for me._

"_I love you."_

"_I love you too, Patch. You better get going and text me when you stop for gas and let me know as soon as you get there so I know you're safe."_

"_Yes mom." He laughed before giving me a tighter hug and placing a kiss on my forehead. I closed my eyes tight willing the tears away._

"_No good-bye's, good-bye is permanent so I'll talk to you soon." I squeezed his hand one last time and stood watching him walk away. I watched him get in the jeep and followed him with my eyes, waving as he turned out of the parking lot on to the road. It took every last bit of strength I had left to not collapse or run after him screaming again for him to stop and stay with me..._

* * *

**_Soooo...yet to come. Patch is working on himself, what will Nora do now that she's somewhat committed to the idea he is going to be gone? Patch seems to be side tracked by some thoughts of romance beyond lust, what will that mean for his future and Nora's? Nora seemed a little jealous, but maybe she was just wanted Patch's attention since he'd been gone? Did anyone like the tattoo idea? There's a reason that Sargent Grey is still around, Vee, Scott and Rixon all have a few surprises in store for us and Dabria is hovering like the angel of death looking for an opportunity to show her face so more to come if ya'll are interested let me know...review review review... ;)_**


	15. Chapter 15 - PROM

**DISCLAIMER:**** I DON'T OWN THE CHARACTERS, THEY BELONG TO THE LOVELY AND TALENTED BECCA FITZPATRICK**

**THIS CHAPTER REUNITES PATCH AND NORA ONCE AGAIN...CHANGES ARE ON THE HORIZON AND NEW PLAYERS ARE JOINING THE STORY IN THIS ONE. THERE ARE A LOT OF SONG LYRICS IN THIS ONE TOWARDS THE END. I ADD THEM TO HELP CREATE THE ATMOSPHERE OF THE SITUATION, BECAUSE THEY INSPIRED ME FOR THE SECTION I'M WRITING AT THE TIME AND HELPS SUPPORT THE ARTISTS I ENJOY. I LISTEN TO ALMOST EVERY GENERA OF MUSIC AND A LOT OF THINGS I WRITE ARE INSPIRED BY THE MUSIC I'M LISTENING TO. IF YOU'RE ENJOYING THIS STORY YOU MIGHT WANT TO TAKE A PEAK AT MY NEW ONE 'DAMAGED', THERE ARE A LOT OF SIMILARITIES AND A LOT OF DIFFERENCES. IT'S THE SECOND STORY I'VE DONE AND IT IS PRETTY COMPLETE SO IT WILL BE POSTED LIKELY FASTER THAN CHAPTERS IN THIS ONE SINCE THIS ONE ISN'T ROUGH DRAFTED OR ANYTHING. THIS FANFIC IS COMING TO YOU STRAIGHT OUT OF MY HEAD TO MY KEYBOARD TO THIS SITE AS I WRITE SO IT'S SLOWER. I TEND TO WRITE MORE THAN ONE STORY AT A TIME SO I DON'T GET STUCK, IT KEEPS THINGS FRESH FOR ME. ANYWAYS, ENOUGH RAMBLING ON WITH THE STORY! IT'S THAT TIME OF THE YEAR, PROM AND PATCH HAS SOME ISSUES CONCERNING NORA, A DRESS AND A CERTAIN NEW STUDENT... :) REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! PLZZZZ**

* * *

_**CHAPTER 15**_

_**PROM**_

_**PATCH**_

"Angel?" I answered my cell on the first ring after Nora's name popped up on the screen.

"I have a question for you."

"Hello to you to." I laughed. "Shoot."

"So you know how it's springtime..."

"Yes I did, Captain Obvious, but thank-you for the delayed heads up." I smirked into the phone.

"Can you get a couple of days away?" Nora ignored by jibe.

"Why?" I asked suspiciously.

"Well..."

"Spit it out Grey."

"Fine. I need a date." Now _that _wasn't what I expected.

"I'm not your type. I only go for desperate girls." I teased, remembering our conversation on my birthday weekend at dinner.

"I am desperate, why else do you think I would ask you?"

"Because I'm the hottest thing to fall from heaven."

"I think you hit your head when you fell if that's what you believe." Nora laughed.

"Ouch, your wounding me."

"No I did not."

"You did, I bet I even have scars to prove it!" I teased her.

"Oh yeah? Let me touch them, I want to see."

"You're just looking for any excuse to get your greedy little hands on my hot body. I didn't know you were into the kinky stuff...scars? Really, Nora, I'd never have guessed." I laughed, I could just picture the way she was rolling her eyes as she snickered.

"Oh brother, how is it every time I talk to you you manage to get more and more full of yourself? And scars...I don't know about that."

"You're just jealous because you're not full of me."

"...And that's when I pull the plug on this conversation and get back to my original question..."

"Which was? You never did give me a straight answer."

"You didn't give me chance!"

"I am now so spit it out."

"Fine. I need a date for Prom."

"You're going to Prom? Since when?" Nora hated school dances, something about bad vibes in gymnasiums. She had a dream one time about falling off the rafters and they've creeped her out ever since.

"I told Vee I'd go and Marcie went and put my freaking name on the ballot and had all of her little foot soldiers vote so I HAVE to go. She finds every possible way she can to make my skin crawl. Hey Patch, hold on a minute I have another call."

"You better not keep me waiting." I warned her. I was almost about to hang up when she came back on the line.

"Patch, you still there."

"No." I rolled my eyes.

"Good. You're off the hook."

"What do you mean I'm off the hook?"

"I have a date for the dance now." Now my attention was captivated.

"Who exactly is this date with and do I know him?" My interest was officially piqued. Who was this guy wanting to take _my angel_ to prom? I didn't know there were any guys interested in her. I don't mean like that, she's gorgeous, who wouldn't be interested, but I mean anyone pursuing her or that she would agree to go with. I'm her best friend, I should know all of this stuff.

"His name is Elliot, he's new to our school, he's a transfer from Kinghorn Prep in Portland."

"The rich kids private school?" I didn't like this kid already.

"Yes, but he was there on a scholarship."

"What does this guy look like?"

"He's got blue eyes, stylish shaggy blond hair that kind of sweeps across his forehead. He looks like he works out a lot and he wears designer clothes and he's charming, but formal with an outgoing personality that doesn't exactly fade into the background."

"Sounds like you like this guy." I hated him already and I could tell there was more she wasn't telling me. She sure knew a lot about him, how long had she known him and better yet was he worthy of such a...detailed description?

"I don't really know him. Him and his friend bought Vee and I breakfast one morning..."

"And?" I knew there was more.

"He helped me in gym. We were playing soft-ball and Marcie was pitching, you know how awful I am. I can't believe he even picked me as his first pick, poor guy didn't know any better."

Poor guy my ass. Guys like me invented moves like that, I bet he stepped in nice and close, put his arms around her wrapping his hands flush over hers then told her to 'relax and pivot her hips'- it's all in the hips'. "It's all in the hips." I muttered, irritated by her naivete that I usually found completely adorable.

"That's what he said!" Yep, I officially hate this Elliot. I don't know why, I've never personally met the guy and Nora's not my property, but she is my best friend and I take my job of looking out for her seriously and any guy using smooth moves like that who's formal _and _"charming" is up to no good. It takes a player to know a player and that guy was a player or worse. I was sooo going to that dance, I just wasn't telling Nora.

"Maybe you'll get to meet him sometime. He seems nice, he gave Marcie the cold shoulder even after she flirted with him which is unheard of. Most guys fall on their knees begging and starving for any crumb of attention she might toss at them."

That much was true, and while I appreciated that he'd choose Nora over Marcie I wasn't at all comfortable with this guy. "When are you going shopping for your dress?" All girls need a new one, especially for prom and I fully intended on approving. I told myself it was the responsible best friend/guardian thing to do and that's why I was going to do it...but that may not be the complete and total truth, not that I'm willing to delve into what other motivations I might have lurking in the back of my mind...

"This weekend. Marcie invited me and our parents are making me go with her. Their letting me go to the Silk Garden shop though so I'm sucking it up. I never get to shop at stores like that, Marcie get's the money and I get the anorexic piggy bank." She sighed.

"I wanted to talk to you this weekend so what time do you think you'll go?" I planned on talking alright...face to face.

I left the Ranch early Saturday morning to make it back to Coldwater Creek in time to meet Nora at the store. I know it was a little overbearing, a tad past over-protective, but something didn't set right with me, plus it would be great to see Nora again I really missed her.

When I got to the dress shop I saw Marcie first, watching for a second I grinned. Nora must be in the dressing room. Perfect, I could sneak in there and avoid Marcie. I despised that bitch.

I let myself in fully expecting Nora to freak out but she was lost in some fantasy I'd give a thousand or more dollars to know because she didn't notice and she had the most beautiful smile on her face I'd ever seen. Whatever she was picturing made her _**VERY **_happy, I hoped it wasn't the new guy. She looked gorgeous in the dress she was trying on. It was an all-over green and navy tartan print and a ruche skirt, the only reason I knew all of that was the many long winded conversations I'd had to sit through at the beach and other outings between Vee and Nora. Vee was somewhat of a shopping addict. Anyhow, the dress made her long legs stand out and her full breast looked..._Stop right there! She's your best friend not some girl you're trying to lay._

"I could get you to smile like that, and without the sales tax." I interrupted her dream before my body got too carried away.

I saw her face light up and my smile got bigger as she threw her arms around my neck and squealed my name, but I didn't miss the way she gave me a once over in my snug white tee and jeans as I smiled down at her when she finally pulled back to look at me.

"I could make all kinds of perverted jokes right now." She shot back.

"I could tell you how much I like you in that dress." I meant it, she looked good.

"How did you get in?"

"I move in mysterious ways."

"God moves in mysterious way. You move like lightning—here one moment, gone the next. How long have you been standing there?" I could see her starting to blush, she must have just gotten changed and was envisioning me seeing her in her bra and panties. Would she wear a thong or boy shorts? What color? My mind started to click through possibilities and I almost wished I hadn't waited those first few minutes scoping it out so long before breaking in... I gave her a dangerous smile and she gasped.

"I'm teasing, Nora. I would have knocked, but I didn't want to linger outside with Marcie there. So this is all for..." I motioned to her dress.

"We're just friends." She said firmly, but a little too quickly to not get my suspicions on red alert. Why was this bothering me so damn much?

I tipped her chin up so she would meet my eyes. "Keep it that way. Enjoy your shopping, I should go see Rixon while I'm in town. I'll catch up with you later." I unhooked my aviator sunglasses and slid them on. "Oh and tell Elliot Saunders if he lays a hand on you I'll shoot him myself." With that I left as fast as I came without anyone noticing I'd been there.

That night I had another one of those dreams, the first one I'd had since the year before when I was plagued with thoughts of Nora in.. not so 'just friends' situations... I was back in the dressing room at the Silk Garden only this time I had my fingers hooked in the belt loops of her jeans and her fingers were raking through my hair, our mouths were a whisper apart, our breath mingling.

"I see you got the red dress instead." I heard my dream self whisper.

"Marcie bought it, I wanted the one you saw me try on." Nora gave a little pout. "I think I'm going to look like Jessica Rabbit, minus the D-cups. It's probably a little snug, Marcie tends to buy down when it comes to sizing me. It has a steep slit up the thigh."

My smile deepened at that.

"Try it on." I told her.

She disappeared into her closet and moments later reappeared in the dress.

"Zip it up?" She asked, turning around.

It moved over her every curve like liquid and the slit fell open halfway up her long slender thigh, exposing a good deal of endless leg. She had swept her hair up off her swan like neck, I was practically drooling.

I gave her a slow assessment with my eyes. There was no way in hell she was going unsupervised to that party. My dream self was rock hard and I wouldn't doubt if my real self wasn't having the same reaction. I needed to get laid. Sooner than later I tried to tell myself when I saw Nora's lips crash to mine in a kiss that was quickly building in intensity. Thinking back on the dream it was surreal, I could almost feel her silky lips on my mine and the swollen feeling of being thoroughly kissed. _God, not again!_ I groaned as my fully awake traitorous body took notice instantly of the memory.

Later that day I casually asked Nora which dress she had gotten, a sudden flash of deja vu hit me when she said Marcie had gone behind her back and bought the red dress that was hanging on the dressing room hook when I broke in the stall. _Great._ I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose as my body cheered and my brain screamed _NOOOO_!

A month later I found myself at the most expensive hotel in Coldwater Creek dressed in a black suit with a silver tie asking for directions to where the dance was being held there. How convenient that it would be held at a hotel I growled to myself in silent irritation. What the hell was wrong with these people? Didn't they understand that holding this event here at a hotel could cost _my angel_ her virginity? Forget that it could work out great for me when I found a girl to whisk away for a little bit of playtime fun.

I located the room it was being held in and observed the crowded dance floor before scanning the tables for any signs of Nora or someone fitting the description of 'Elliot'. I was starting to think I'd somehow missed her when she walked in on the arm of a tall blonde. So that was Saunders. He maybe built but he was no match for me. I quickly ducked out of sight, wanting to observe them together before I stepped in.

Suddenly I felt somebody tap me on the shoulder, turning around I saw a blond with fine straight hair that tumbled past her elbows and was parted at the crown of her oval-shaped face, her skin was pale and flawless and she had sea blue eyes and a lush mouth. Her figure was willowy, but elegant. She was very pretty, not Nora, but pretty.

"Hi, I'm Dabria, I don't think I've met you before." She held out her hand like she expected me to kiss the back of it like I was some gentleman from the eighteen hundreds. No thanks. "Nice to meet you Dabria." I wanted to be polite not scare her away since getting laid was a goal long past due, but I didn't want to lead her on thinking I was interested in something I most definitely wasn't.

"I don't attend Coldwater Creek I'm just here to see a friend." I flashed her a smile which she responded to immediately. Yup, worked every time, Dabria was already putty in my hands.

"You wouldn't have seen me there anyways, I graduated four years ago. I'm here with a friend."

"I used to go here so I know most of the kids, who's your friend?" I tried making light conversation while keeping a discreet eye on Nora.

"Rixon."

"You've got to be kidding me, what are the odds of that." I said more to myself than to her. "How do you know Rixon?"

"We go waaaay back, he's almost like family only not, if that makes any sense." She laughed and flicked her hair looking nervous for the first time since she tapped me before she collected herself. "How well do _you_ know him?"

"He's a very close friend. One of the few people I trust."

"So you're here to see him?" Something in her voice made me glance over at her, she was staring at the area where Nora was talking to Vee and I got an eery flash and then it was gone. Her eyes were distant and cold, whatever or whoever she was looking at was not making her happy.

"No, not really." I left my answer brief and vague on purpose. I didn't know her and I didn't need anyone meddling in my business.

We visited for a little while until I saw Scott making his way towards Nora. What the hell was this? I didn't like Elliot or trust him and I _sure as hell_ didn't like or trust Scott. I stopped paying attention to what Debbie was saying...that was her name, right? To be honest I didn't really care, I should have, she was _almost _angelic, but she was no match for Nora's beauty. Why all the sudden was I comparing every girl I met to my best friend? I shook my head trying to clear it of my tangled thoughts.

My vision sharpened and I zoned in on every little body movement as Scott approached Nora, wanting to read their non-verbal language body language. At first Nora looked ready to hit Scott and Elliot narrowed his eyes at him, obviously he considered Scott competition. Then Elliot's phone rang, he answered it and spoke really briefly before making a few nervous glances at Nora and hung up. I saw him touch her arm and whisper something in her ear which she nodded to, looking worried before nudging him away with her hand as if shoving him out the door. What was that all about? Was he leaving her at the Prom all alone? I didn't have too much time to ponder that before I saw Nora give Scott a smile, but still it was a tight smile as she started to follow him out towards the dance floor which told me it was time to make my presence known.

"I have to go." I told whats-her-name and started to walk away, but she called after me.

"I didn't even get your name."

"You can call me Patch." I flashed her a here and gone smile that spoke of all kinds of trouble with a capital T. "I mean it, call me." I walked back to her knowing I had her hook line and sinker as I reached in my suit pocket and grabbed my black pen before writing my cell number on her arm and with another flash of a smile I was gone. She'd be calling by tomorrow afternoon if not before.

I reached Nora and Scott just as he was starting to pull her into his arms and the first notes began to play. I grabbed his arm and spun him around. Nora jumped at my sudden appearance and Scott's face turned cold.

"What do you want, Cipriano? You don't go here anymore." He sneered.

I ignored the last part and answered the first.

"Put so much as one tiny wrinkle on her dress, let your hand or lips stray so much as one degree off and I'll be your every worst nightmare come true." My voice was as black as my eyes with warning and hatred. This punk hurt my Angel and that was unforgivable in my book.

"What's it to you? It's not like you're dating her, you act like a jealous boyfriend, big brother and over-protective father." He glared daggers at me as if that would have any affect.

"I don't have to date her to protect her and try it and you'll find out what it means to me." Scott was a big guy, tough as nails and still no match for me. I knew how to fight and I packed more than a ferocious punch. He may talk a good game and be able to knock other people out with one punch, but I'd figured out last time he knew better than to fight me, at least he did when he was sober. He wouldn't have time to strike before it was lights out in a fight against me.

* * *

_**NORA**_

I had been surprised when Scott had come over to apologize though I wasn't ready to make up just yet. He'd never be more than a friend now, if even that. What shocked the hell out of me though was Patch grabbing his arm and threatening him in a menacing voice that sent chills down my spine. If anyone had the capability and willingness to make good on a promise like that it was Patch. He didn't mess around and when it came to me...well he _REALLY _didn't mess around. I still couldn't believe he was here, he hadn't said anything and I'd told him I had a date. I was more than a little confused.

"That's it, I'm out. Sorry Nora, I owe you a dance but I'm not sticking around to be harassed by your body-guard or whoever/whatever he is to you. I don't know what's going on between you two, but I'm not wasting anymore of my time." With that Scott stormed off.

"Good riddance, half-breed." Patch muttered darkly under his breath.

I cocked an eyebrow at him. "Half-breed?"

"Long story for another time."

"What are you doing here? Besides scaring off my only dance partner?" Not that I minded, I wasn't comfortable with the thought of dancing with Scott, but I hadn't wanted to stand around by myself while Vee was dancing with Rixon until Marcie swooped in to make my life a living hell. If she or her posse spotted me alone that is exactly what she would do. She looked for any and every opportunity, she lived for it.

"I'm here to dance with you."

"Uh huh." No way would he drive that far to attend a school dance that stood for everything he was against without a better reason than that.

"I wanted to make sure you were going to be okay and I did want to dance with you, not to mention I hadn't seen you in this dress yet." He winked at me and gave me a kiss on the head. "You look stunning, Angel."

I blushed a deep red, the warmth spreading through my entire body and it wasn't entirely unpleasant if you know what I mean. "Thank-you. You're not looking so bad yourself, Cipriano." I nudged him playfully with my elbow as my smile grew.

"Would you like to dance?" His dark eyes sparkled with mischief under the colored lights.

"That is the point of a dance isn't it." I teased as he led me back through the throng of students. "After all, you drove all this way." I winked at him and he laughed.

A slow song started and Patch pulled me close in his arms and I had to sigh at the security I found in there as we started moving to the gentle rhythm of the music.

_**So Mo-Ride**_

_[Hook:]__  
_Take off those heels, lay on my bed_  
_Whisper dirty secrets while I'm pulling on your hair_  
_Poison in our veins, but we don't even care_  
_Candles dripping on your body, baby this ain't truth or dare_  
_Everybody wonders where we've run off to_  
_My body on your body, baby sticking like some glue_  
_Naughty, let's get naughty, girl it's only one or two_  
_The fever's fucking running, feel the heat between us two!_[Chorus:]__  
_I'm gon' ride, I'm gon' ride_  
_I'm gon' ride, I'm, I'm gon' ride on you baby_  
_On you lady, all night, all, all night!_  
_I'm gon' take care of your body,_  
_I'll be gentle, don't you scream_  
_It's getting hotter, make it softer,_  
_Feel your chest on top of me._  
_I'm gon' ride, I'm gon' ride_  
_I'm gon' ride, I'm, I'm gon' ride on you baby_  
_On you lady, all night, all night!_  
_I'm gon' make you feel that loving,_  
_Getting weak all in your knees._  
_Kiss your body from the tip-top,_  
_All the way down to your feet!Oh, oh, oh, and we can go slow, slow,_  
_Yeah we can go slow, oh, oh, oh_  
_Lay on your back, you like it right there_  
_Don't have to say it twice_  
_Love, there's nothing here to fear_  
_Taking it back, back to where it's clear_  
_Rolling on and on, sounds of love are in the air!

I'm gon' ride, I'm gon' ride_  
_I'm gon' ride, I'm, I'm gon' ride on you baby_  
_On you lady, all night, all, all night!_  
_I'm gon' take care of your body,_  
_I'll be gentle, don't you scream_  
_It's getting hotter, make it softer,_  
_Feel your chest on top of me._  
_I'm gon' ride, I'm gon' ride_  
_I'm gon' ride, I'm, I'm gon' ride on you baby_  
_On you lady, all night, all night!_  
_I'm gon' make you feel that loving,_  
_Getting weak all in your knees._  
_Kiss your body from the tip-top,_  
_All the way down to your feet!Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh_  
_Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh yeahThe sun's coming up, oh_  
_You're on my side, oh_  
_I rub your thigh, oh_  
_You look in my eyes, oh_  
_And I just see the sky (see the sky)_  
_I'm so high but I ain't smoked yet,_  
_I'm just coming down from this!

I closed my eyes and got lost in the solid feeling of Patch's body pressed to mine. Taking a deep breath I inhaled his delicious scent, he smelled of earth, mint and something spicy and distinctly Patch. Soon enough the song ended and another began, this one a little faster.

_**Good Kisser-Usher**_

_[Refrain:]__  
_See, I told her_  
_The devil is a lie_  
_Them other girls can't compete with mine_  
_You do it so good, you fuck my mind_  
_You pull it out, then you open fire_  
_You make me wanna tap out and retire_  
_Your pretty lips leave me so inspired_[Pre-chorus 1:]__  
_I think that she a winner_  
_She could be a keeper_[Chorus:]__  
_'Cause she's such a good kisser_  
_Got lipstick on my leg_  
_Oh, baby_  
_She's such a good kisser_  
_Imma rain on this parade_  
_Oh, baby

When the song began Patch had spun me out and pulled my back firmly to the front of his body where I could feel every muscle ripple with his every move. He nuzzled his chin gently against my hair moving it out-of-the-way so his lips were almost on my neck and I could feel the heat of his breath. I had to bite back a moan and stop myself from pushing back into him as the lyrics played out and I remembered the heat of his kiss the year before. He could do sinful things with his mouth against my lips. When that song ended Patch spun me out again and turned me to face him as the first bars of 'I Like It by Enrique Iglesias ft Pitbull rang out and a big smile lit up both our faces as the energy in the room sparked and the wicked gleam in Patch's eyes made me laugh.

"God I love that sound." He said when he pulled me in briefly before twirling me.

"This song?"

"No silly, your laugh."

"Oh." I blushed. I always felt so good with him.

The following song was a little more rock and I forgot all about the fact that somewhere in the room was my enemy, my half-sister Marcie. Somehow no matter where we were when I was with Patch he was all that existed.

**"Bad Girlfriend"**

My Girlfriend's a dick magnet My Girlfriend's gotta have it  
She's hot, can't stop, up on stage, doing shots, Tip the man he'll  
Ring the bell, get her drunk she'll scream like hell.  
Dirty girl, gettin' down, dance with guys from outta town.  
Grab her ass, actin' tough. Mess with her, she'll fuck you up.  
No one really knows if she's drunk or if she's stoned, but she's  
Comin' back to my place tonight!

_[Chorus:]_  
She likes to shake her ass she grinds it to the beat  
She likes to pull my hair when I make her grind her teeth  
I like to strip her down she's naughty to the end  
You know what she is, no doubt about it  
She's a bad, bad girlfriend!

Red thong, Party's on, Love this song, sing along.  
Come together, leave alone, see you later back at home  
No one really knows if she's drunk or is she's stoned  
But she's coming back to my place tonight. I say  
No one really knows just how far she's gonna go,  
But I'm gonna find out later tonight

The song Lil' Freak poured through the speakers next and Patch turned me guiding my hips against his and I could feel his body wide awake and responding to mine. This time I heard him growl soft and deep against the shell of my ear as his hands gripped my hips tighter pulling me back into him and I couldn't help but grind against his bulge as my body sought some much needed friction and I couldn't hold back the low moan that slid across my lips.

**"Lil' Freak"**_  
_**(Usher feat. Nicki Minaj)**

Aye girl yeah you da business  
So what the business?  
Don't be shy  
I'm just talkin' to you girl  
Aye ma, yo where yo man at?  
I know you got that  
Cause you too fine to be single out here girl  
Yo buddy done fucked up  
I'll swoop this girl up  
and what I'm bout to do  
He'll feel I did him wrong  
Cause I'm bout go have a ménage  
With this lady and some freaks at the bar  
who like fuckin' with a star  
I told her

If you fuckin' with me  
Really fuckin' with me  
You go get some girls and  
Bring em to me  
If you fuckin' with me  
Really fuckin' with me  
You'll let her put her hands in your pants  
Be my little freak  
Be my little freak  
Be my little freak  
Let her put her hands in your pants  
Be my little freak  
If you fuckin' with me  
Really fuckin' with me  
Let her put her hands in your pants  
Be my little freak

…_..._

_[Nicki Minaj:]__  
_Excuse me little mama_  
_But you could say I'm on duty_  
_I'm lookin' for a cutie_  
_A real big o' ghetto booty_  
_I really like your kitty kat_  
_And if you let me touch her_  
_I know you're not a bluffer_  
_I'll take you to go see Usher_  
_I keep a couple hoes_  
_Like Santa I keep a vixen_  
_Got that dasher, dancer, prancer_  
_Dixen, comet, cupid, Donner, BLITZEN!_  
_I'm hotter than 100 degrees_  
_A lotta bread, no sesame seeds_  
_If I'm in yo city_  
_I'm signin them tig ol bitties_  
_I'm plottin on how I can take Cassie away from Diddy_  
_The girls want a Minaj_  
_Yeah they wetta than a Rainmen_  
_Usher buzz me in,_  
_EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND!If you fuckin' with me_  
_Really fuckin' with me_  
_You go get some girls and_  
_Bring em to me_  
_If you fuckin' with me_  
_Really fuckin' with me_  
_You'll let her put her hands in your pants_  
_Be my little freak_  
_Be my little freak_  
_Be my little freak_  
_Let her put her hands in your pants_  
_Be my little freak_  
_If you fuckin' with me_  
_Really fuckin' with me_  
_Let her put her hands in your pants_  
_Be my little freak

"We need to get out of here. Now." I heard him whispered in a deep husky voice dripping in seduction. _Fuck. My. Life. _I nodded as he briskly led me off the floor through the packed room and out the door to the main part of the hotel. For a minute I thought I saw a blond that had been with Vee and Rixon earlier in the evening watching us and giving me a look made of ice and steel, but when I blinked she was gone so I brushed it off, too distracted by the buzzing bee's swarming through my whole circulatory system courtesy of Patch.

When we were out in the lights away from the throbbing beat, teenage hormones and lyrics meant to energize and...Patch dropped my hand and started pacing furiously before punching the wall.

"Fuck. I'm sorry, I had to get out of there before I did something we'd both regret."

For a minute his words stung. Would having sex with me be so bad? Then reality hit me of what he meant. I was all he really had, he was all I had, without each other we'd be totally alone, was sex worth enough to risk that? No.

"Please say something. Did I already screw this up? I can't lose you, Angel. I'm so sorry. I don't know what the fuck is getting into me, I haven't been with anyone for almost a year, my body is overwhelmed with the build up of..."

"You, _the famous_ Patch Cipriano, haven't had sex in a _**year?!**_" I gasped, my heart skipping a beat, my playboy hadn't gotten any in twelve months?! No wonder he was so aroused, it wasn't me it was just his out of control testosterone!" I closed my eyes for a minute fighting back the swirl of emotions running through me, hurt, understanding, lust, relief we hadn't thrown out seventeen years of friendship for something that..._Damn but it would feel so good, _my body pulsed with need. "I get it, it's fine I was just as much at fault I wasn't exactly not responding." I looked at him and after a brief look of insecurity his normal mask of flirt and danger was back in place.

"Well I can't blame you, look at me!" He chuckled and I rolled my eyes but I had to laugh. He really was the cockiest asshole I'd ever met.

"Careful Cipriano, you and your ego won't fit through the door and you'll be stuck here living in the hotel." I smirked.

"Let's get out of here." He grabbed my arm.

"Where are we going?" I asked as he led me outside into the night.

"I'm thinking breakfast." His eyes danced in the starlight as the moon cast light and shadows against his gorgeous face. He was so handsome in the early hours of dawn it hurt to look at him.

"Sounds good to me." I smiled. "I get the impression I didn't really have a choice anyhow."

"You didn't, but you're okay with that because you love me." He flashed me one of his genuine smiles he reserves only for me looking so happy and relaxed as he pulled me to him and slid his arm around my waist pulling me close again.

"Yeah I do." I sighed, closing my eyes for just a second, face tilted to the sky taking a steadying breath as he guided my feet to his jeep. _Maybe more than is good for me..._

* * *

**THERE SHE IS, WHAT DO YOU THINK GUYS? IT'S JUST A TEASE I KNOW NO REAL LEMONS...YET... POOR PATCH, NO ACTION FOR A YEAR! :O**

**ARE YOU LIKING IT SO FAR? THE REVIEWS AND FEEDBACK ARE GREAT SO TY TY TY TO ALL THAT ARE WRITING THEM AND TO THOSE SIGNED IN UNDER YOUR ACCOUNT I WRITE EVERYONE BACK THAT I CAN BETWEEN STORIES. I LIVE, EAT, BREATH, SLEEP...MY LAPTOP AND WRITING SO THANK YOU AGAIN FOR READING! :)**


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